Limiting Beliefs
I've been thinking a lot about limiting beliefs recently - like when we tell ourselves "oh, I'm really bad at X," or "I have never been good at Y." It's interesting how much these beliefs can make it harder for us to grow!
The Inner Development Goals course mentions that Optimism is a skill that can be developed for enabling change. It describes Optimism as: "the ability to maintain and convey a sense of hope, a positive attitude, and confidence in the potential for meaningful change."
Something interesting that I think could help with this is the understanding that what we believe about ourselves can either reinforce our bad habits or make behaviour change easier. Our brain is wired to work harder to maintain habits that match our self-image.
As an example, let's look at some possible self-talk that someone who wants to start working out 4x a week could have:
- "I can just never stick to a workout schedule" --> this is a limiting belief that ties our identity to being bad at working out consistently, so we are less likely to achieve this goal.
- "I'm going to try sticking to a workout schedule" --> this is not a limiting belief about ourselves, but it frames working out consistently as something external to us, rather than tying it to who we are. It's more helpful, but we can do better!
- "I'm someone who prioritizes my health and takes the time to exercise regularly" --> this ties the habit we want to develop to our identity, so our brain will work with us to maintain this habit!
It's not about lying to ourselves, but it's about reframing our thoughts to get our brain to work with us as we work to change our behaviour. We all have the capacity to grow and can shape who we are over time. Like Dr. Tracey Marks says, "You're choosing a version of yourself to grow into, and you're reinforcing it with small, consistent actions." (YouTube Video: WhySome People Build Better Habits (and How You Can Too))
So what's one of your limiting beliefs, and what could you tell yourself instead? 🌻
@SilverWhiteWinters
This really spoke to me. One of my limiting beliefs used to be “I’m not confident enough to start something new.” I realised it wasn’t true, I was just afraid of failing. Lately, I’ve been trying to reframe it as “I’m learning and growing every time I try.” It feels lighter that way, and it reminds me that progress doesn’t need perfection, only patience.
@LopaConnect
I love this so much, and choosing to face your fear of failure by trying new things shows so much courage and strength. I can see why your reframe of your old limiting belief made things feel lighter for you - fear of failure can be so heavy and discouraging, but it's so true that every time we try, we are learning and growing! And you've worded that so well - progress doesn't need perfection, only patience indeed! Even baby steps all add up into big progress over time ✨ Thank you for sharing this with us, your story is so encouraging! 🌻
@SilverWhiteWinters I love this! Reframing limiting beliefs really shifts how we approach growth. I’ve found that simply changing my self-talk from “I can’t do this” to “I’m learning to do this” makes challenges feel more manageable and encourages consistency.
@raymaniii
Thank you for your comment! 🌞 You're so right, and that's such a good point - reframing can definitely be so helpful in shifting our approach to growth (it's helped me, too!)! What you've said reminds me of the difference between fixed mindsets (believing skills and intelligence are unchangeable/static) vs growth mindsets (believing they can be developed and worked on). When we fail, having a fixed mindset can be devastating because we can see it as a reflection of who we are (if we believe our skills are fixed and unchangeable), but having a growth mindset can help us pick ourselves back up easier, recognize we are all capable of learning and growing, and try again! I absolutely love hearing about how your shift in your self-talk has helped you feel more capable and encouraged to take consistent steps towards your goals! 🌻
@SilverWhiteWinters
@jibbbie
I love this, thank you so much for sharing 🌻 It's so encouraging to hear about how reframing your thoughts has been changing the way you approach both school and hobbies! It sounds like you've found such a great way to open up more curiosity in yourself, and that's such a beautiful thing 🌞 I wish you well in your learning endeavors!
@SilverWhiteWinters
One of my limiting beliefs is that I can never get anything done because I procrastinate so much. However, I still manage to get things done and do well, so this statement isn't even completely true. I think I would rephrase it into, "I am a hardworking person who gets things done even when it is hard for me to stay focused." This way, it acknowledges the struggle without seeing it as an immovable obstacle. :)
Procrastination can be such a difficult thing, especially in this day and age with all the distractions we face - so thank you so much for sharing this with us!! The reframe of your limiting belief is so beautiful to read 🌻 I love what you've said about acknowledging the struggle, without seeing it as an immovable obstacle. It's so self-compassionate while also tying your identity to being hardworking - I feel optimistic and motivated just reading it to myself! And how true that the difficulty in staying focused doesn't define you, it just shows how even more hardworking you are that you persevere and overcome those challenges to still complete things and do well 🫶 I love this!
In a TEDx talk, Coach Patrick Mouratoglou spoke about the power of our inner words, how what we say to ourselves can either limit us or lift us. This idea has always stayed with me. And from this post also, I would say reframing our self-talk by replacing harsh criticism with kinder, more supportive words it truly transforms how a person sees themselves and what they believe they are capable of. It’s not about ignoring problems, but about choosing to speak to ourselves the way we would speak to someone we care about.
In a TEDx talk, Coach Patrick Mouratoglou spoke about the power of our inner words, how what we say to ourselves can either limit us or lift us. This idea has always stayed with me. And from this post also, I would say reframing our self-talk by replacing harsh criticism with kinder, more supportive words it truly transforms how a person sees themselves and what they believe they are capable of. It’s not about ignoring problems, but about choosing to speak to ourselves the way we would speak to someone we care about.
@BMGSerein
Sorry for the late response, I think my notification for this got lost. But I love what you've written - it's so true that self-compassion, and speaking to ourselves the way we would speak to a friend or loved one, can make life so much better! What you've talked about reminds me of a metaphor I heard once that stayed with me, too: If a friend fell face-first in the mud, we would help them up, not push them down further. Yet sometimes we can be so self-critical that we push ourselves further down, and it only holds us back. Thanks for your wise words 🌻
@SilverWhiteWinters
One of my limiting beliefs is that I need to do more to be enough. Instead, I can remind myself that I am already doing my best, and that steady, gentle progress is enough.
@SimplyCompassionate
That's so true - all we can do is our best, and steady baby steps add up to massive change over time! Also, you are worth so much more than just what you achieve - you're enough because you're you. No one else will ever be as you as you are, and you add a special flavor to this world that no one else can. We're human beings, not human doings 💛
@SilverWhiteWinters
Thank you so much for the motivation 🤗
@SilverWhiteWinters
Discovering my limiting beliefs and working on them, changed my life completely, and brought me, most of all, inner peace. Getting out of fixed thoughts gave me more hope and made me see the world more openly. Going further on this path of challenging my beliefs I have realised that I have also borrowed a lot of limiting beliefs. Still further was to realise how the ones around me tried to convince me of limiting beliefs in real time, and to not assimilate them automatically anymore.
