Consider this my Resignation if this does not stop!

Jem I am so sorry and I so wish that the Ip addresses would stay banned but due to them having Vpn's they bypass the Ip Bans ... there needs to be a way to Block the Vpn's !!

No one should have to tolerate what you have been !! I am so sorry and I hope that this is resolved ASAP

You are so loved here and appreciated and so awesome we do not wanna lose you !

Tye

@Jem7Cups Hi Jem, I am so sorry to hear what you have experianced here. I have enjoyed your helpful forum posts and have attended discussions with you in anxiety which were very helpful also. Thank you for all that you do, it means a lot! You would be missed, but I understand that you have to take care of yourself.

@Jem7Cups (this raised my wolf hairs on my back...you have my sympathy...please do not leave, we need you...)

@Jem7Cups I agree. We should all heed your warning and think about our own safety above everything else.

It's depressing that the Listener Oath contradicts this.

Unfortunately IP bans don't work because for many people it's really simple to change their IP, and besides that, IPs are shared by the innocent.

Potential solutions to the problem of abusive members do exist, but 7 Cups has never shown any interest in implementing them. And discussing issues in the forum like this almost never has any effect at all on 7 Cups itself, which seems resistant to serious problem solving.

Considering yesterday's related post by @Mamabearmedic about Arsenic soup bullying, I wonder if we are now heading for yet another crisis within 7 Cups.

Charlie

@Jem7Cups Hi my friend. I'm so sorry this is happening you. This is unacceptable in my opinion and this is exactly the reason why I stopped taking general requests. This has happened to me too before and I wish it didn't. I'm going to ask around and see if there is anything further we can do about this because I don't want to lose you. You are a very valuable assest to our depression community. PM me anytime if you need to.

@Jem7Cups

Hello!

I'm sorry you went through this. I completely agree with what you're saying. I as a member or a listener (for which I signed up quite recently) have faced similar situations where I find people using this as a cheap substitute to find a date! And it hurts me so much to know that they are taking up time and space from those members who would actually be suffering and would need a listener. And it's not just the members being like this, but also a listener that I came across in my initial few weeks. That guy went on to discuss my mom's "loneliness" in his opinion, when I told him that I had lost my dad. It shook me up so bad that I couldn't even say anything. That too when I was going through a tough time! It's horrible what some people are like, member or Listener. I request all of you to block such people, and continue to block them. This is not a place to get yourself laid. We are trying to support each other, perhaps even save lives. Please understand.

Safety on this website has always been a major issue. Everything has a pro and con to it. Anonymity has the pro of being able to share your feelings and situations without someone knowing who you are, but then you have people who abuse the anonymity available on this site. Everywhere you go there are people who are out to hurt someone else. Some say it's because they go through something awful and the only way they know how to project is by expressing it negatively. Some say there are people who are mean spirited either way. However, everyone is responsible for how they treat others and how they deal with their struggles. I really hate that someone is contacting you and saying such vulgar things like this to you. We have the steps like you mentioned which aren't enough. I really would be sad if things don't change and cause you to leave the community. You are an ASSET here. You can only do so many reports which aren't handled fast enough. You can only change your name, photo, and bio so many times. We shouldn't be the ones who have to keep changing when we're not the problem. Plain and simple. They keep coming back on new accounts and continue to berate and harass. It isn't fair that those working so hard to be a listening ear for others have to put up with people like this. There has to be something done more to implement safety on this site. Other support sites have ways to keep safe and they thrive in it. So what is so different about this place? I wish I had the answers to the questions. WE NEED BETTER SAFETY MEASURES AND WE NEED TO BE BETTER AT HANDLING PEOPLE WHO ARE THREATENING.

My heart goes out to you, @Jem7Cups !! As a Listener who has received toxic messages from members like this— Ive often wondered the same thing. The way you feel as a result is only natural and unfortunately, Im sure we may have lost many astounding listeners, like yourself, due to situations like this. So, thank you for being vulnerable in this space to admit theres an issue that needs to be better addressed.

Its devastating that I can hear the voice of many listeners through yours— including my own— we definitely need to do better. 7Cups is greater because youre here just as there are many powerful and captivating minds that gather here to serve those in our online mental health community who request emotional support during their most trying times— we all deserve to feel protected.

Giving our listeners a space to be safe in is just as crucial as keeping our members safe. I know our admins are doing the best they can to stay on top of issues like this, like they have been in the past— but its clear theres still grounds to improve upon and I hope this brave testimony sparks conversations that lead to more effective resolutions. ♡

Much luv, Jem. ♡ Thank you.

I'm sorry to hear this @Jem7Cups 😟 You have been very valuable and i love your posts. This is actually the reason why i rarely take general request now, and even some of my personal request are still filled with people asking for sx chats or harrassing and i had to block them since they keep messaging back at me (some were even new listeners which is scary in its own way), I have known a few listeners as well who ended up leaving this site for those reasons, especially the sudden increase of them since the epidemic lockdown. It is actually a long known issue when i ask but it seems no one will start taking countermeasures, which is sad since listeners who dedicate their time like you get abused and triggered and scared. Listener still new their space as well as members cause we're all human! Not some unfeeling bot.

We cant do much with IPs and VPNs since its actually a quite open place and how do you actually blocked them?? A suggestion (this is another listener who suggested to me and i think its great) like making a tie in code when creating an account (like contact numbers) to restrict it, since personal info is confidential anyway. 7Cups is a great place to find emotional support with like-minded people but also a gathering place for people to be abused by this if not careful by toxic people, thank you Jem for bringing this up.

I know the admins have been trying to solve this long time issue, and trying their best and im glad for it, but i really hope they really start to take action before all the valuable listeners we have leaves.

- Tea ☕ || Life is not a game of luck. If you wanna win, work hard. – Sora, NGNL

Hi @Jem7Cups, I am really sorry that you have been experiencing this and I hear you, it is frustrating to have to put up with such advances when you are volunteering your time to genuinely support members. Please know that your time and efforts are very much appreciated and we see the work you put in. Thank you for consistently reporting that helps us remove unsupportive people from the platform. I assure you the community team has been more focused than ever on the safety of our users and we are consistently working on removing such people. I have pmd you to get some more information on the matter. Thank you for voicing your concerns.