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What's the best way to stop feeling insecure about yourself?

23 Answers
Last Updated: 01/26/2021 at 10:46pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Tracy-Kate Teleke, PsyD, M.A., LMFT

Marriage & Family Therapist

I assist adults and couples in CA experiencing relationship challenges and interpersonal struggles including anxiety, depression, and a myriad of other life challenges.

Top Rated Answers
Ben1987
June 21st, 2016 12:24pm
For me it´s actually the jump in the cold water. Insecurity is difficult to defeat so a way to handle it is to not let it block your way. I´ve had it often at work that i thought "wow, i´m not sure if i can do this or talk to this person and so on". I took a deep breath and then did it. And sure, there are the times it doesn´t went as expected. But the most time, and believe me, it´s actually the most time, it was amazing to see, that i´m able to do more more, then i thought. And so can you! Stay calm, focus and surprise yourself ;)
Anonymous
February 29th, 2016 9:33pm
Someone out there loves the things you may be insecure about. Loving yourself can take time. :)
Anonymous
January 26th, 2021 10:46pm
Remind yourself that you are not your insecurities. Your insecurities do not define who you are. Remember that everyone has their own personal insecurities, and they are more focused on their own insecurities than the ones you have. Think about the particular insecurity you have and ask yourself these questions. Are you insecure about it because you feel it does not align with what society says is acceptable? Do you feel this is something you should change about yourself because it negatively effects your physical or mental well-being? If your answer is yes, what are some steps you can take to make improvements? What resources are available to help reach your goals? What communities are available to help provide support?
allopic
June 28th, 2018 12:42pm
Try to think about a different thing you can do every day, write it down each day and for a moment focus so hard on that thing. You will feel even a tiny bit better every day and it will contribute to your self esteem. My sister is very secure about her abilities and one day she told me that she could do anything, almost any job, because she is very hard working and always developing different skills, and seeing her so confident about herself was so hard to even consider and so eye-opening as I have been struggling all my life with being insecure. She of course can't really do everything on this planet but the thought of it is enough to boost her self confidence. As for me I'm still trying to be a little less insecure (it depends on the day and situations) but the skill list helps when I feel down.
Rhyly
March 13th, 2018 7:59am
Start hyping yourself up! Don’t focus on the negative, focus on the positive. When you look in the mirror, stop looking for things that are wrong and start pointing out the parts of yourself that you love. In the morning, name at least 3 things you appreciate yourself, then name 1 thing you want to work on. Set goals. Realistic ones. Also, stop letting others tell you what is beautiful and what isn’t. If YOU love YOU, that’s all that matters ✨
infinitetangledthoughts
February 6th, 2018 9:05am
The best way to stop feeling insecure about yourself is to find something you love. Something you're passionate about. Something that's yours and only yours and no one can touch it. Something you can turn to and appreciate; how despite how there might be someone better in the same field, you're the best version of you and that's pretty beautiful in itself. And when you embrace yourself, other people will start to love you too. And that's pretty perfect, after all.
gentlelambslave
January 23rd, 2018 8:47pm
There is not only one way to stop feeling insecure we just have to deal with it as it come I feel that we all feel insecure about oneself at one point or another we just have to take the bad thought and see it in a positive way also we can have people tell us everyday good things about us and we can do the same for them.
Heretolisten5
October 9th, 2017 4:50pm
Just think about your true beauty because it's on the inside that matters and everybody is beautiful in there own unique way!
Anonymous
June 21st, 2016 5:20pm
stop comparing yourself with others.. what you have.. no one has.. just think what makes you YOU.. there is something in all of us.. you're unique. just believe in yourself :)
Abbeyy
March 16th, 2016 10:21pm
Wake up every morning drink some water look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself you're beautiful . Think nothing but happy thoughts
UnknownAngel
March 5th, 2016 7:38pm
Stop thinking about all the negative things about yourself.
blindParadise96
March 4th, 2016 9:32pm
I think we will always feel insecure about anything. We have to. It's human nature. None of us can see ourselves as perfect because we know ourselves too well. But you can always learn to love your insecurities or focus more on your abilities and positive views more.
Deathsnemesis
January 26th, 2015 4:51pm
I laugh at my flaws. I know that sounds ironic and like a bad way to deal with it but it helps. I laugh because I remember they make me who I am and without them I wouldn't even be huma.
Anonymous
September 21st, 2015 12:26am
It's never an easy process. Finding things that you love about yourself and focusing on those aspects can help you gain confidence. Accepting the things that you don't love might help you to think about them less. Overall, be confident in the things you do well and treat yourself with love and respect.
cherishedJet13
August 17th, 2015 8:05am
Just take yourself as a joke once and a while. Laugh at yourself, make fun of yourself. It will show you to just stop caring what others think about you and live the life you want to live without any restrictions.
Anonymous
August 3rd, 2015 2:46pm
There are a few ways, in my experience, that this can be accomplished. Realizing that you are not alone. Insecurity affects many people. Recognizing your personal strengths and learning how to focus on those. Understanding that failure is not a negative thing but more of a mechanism to help us improve. No one is perfect.
cristiana33
July 27th, 2015 8:22pm
The idea itself of suddenly stopping to do something is impossible... From my experience, what is in our best interest is to try to identify what are the issues that make us insecure more... do these issues come from how we deal with ourselves or how we behave in social situations and how we compare ourselves with others? As soon as we identify what is the barrier and how we would like to improve we can try to make everyday small steps into becoming more grateful for how we are and what we are achieving slowly... I think that should be a easy and steady recipe to improve how we see ourselves.
Anonymous
May 28th, 2015 6:41am
You write down things you value and find pretty about yourself and being grateful for it. You're all beautiful
CinnamonLover
May 27th, 2015 9:05am
by focusing on what you r good at , and keep on developing that thing , nobody 8s perfect these days ? Everyone has their flaw and ugly side but the only difference is that some people have more good side than the ugly one , and they didn't get it naturally , they worked on it , they worked on themselves so they can be a better person , and nobody can be like you , in this whole planet / universe , your unique because there is only ONE you
Anonymous
May 3rd, 2015 6:03pm
First you have to recognise what you feel is wrong about yourself and write it down. Then think about why you don't like them parts. Now go out and improve on your faults because if they never change how are your feeling going to change?
Dovah
April 29th, 2015 12:55pm
Surround yourself with people who make you feel good, cut out all toxic people, no matter how hard, itll be better in the long run. Make a schedule or your time, and have time set out for thing you find fun, walks, games, reading, baths. Treat yourself, and cut out toxic people. Life is too short to make war with yourself.
knickknacks
April 22nd, 2015 1:11pm
Just remember always that we were created equal. There are things that you have but others dont. Just be thankful for what you have and being contented is the key to being secure.
Anonymous
March 21st, 2015 9:35pm
Find your strengths and work on them. In time, each strength will lead to something else you feel insecure about and give you the courage to work on those insecurities.