Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav

Why am I not good enough for my family?

20 Answers
Last Updated: 01/21/2020 at 7:14am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Brenda King, PsyD


I treat life changes, women’s issues, and issues of aging using evidence-based treatments with healthy doses of warmth, empathy and humor to enhance healing and growth.

Top Rated Answers
November 26th, 2014 6:08am
If you feel you are never going to be good enough for the people in your life, you need to ask if they are good enough for you. Ask yourself what it means to be a good person. Live by the deals that you set for yourself, not by the expectations (good or bad) of others. You may not be able to be good enough for them, but you can be good enough for you.
April 30th, 2019 12:58pm
You are never not good enough for your family. Please don't ever think that you are not good enough for something or someone. You are an amazing human being and you should know that. Even if your family keeps giving you the vibe that your not good enough, don't listen. You are amazing, never think that please. You are good enough, you are amazing, you are worthy, and you are valid. Please trust me, you are more than good enough for your family. Please trust me on this. Your Friend, LuminousSoul78
November 26th, 2014 6:08am
Your whole personality is based on what you are thinking in your mind, if all you think is negative things you will be perceived as a negative person. Work on loving yourself and creating a better you and those feelings will go away.
October 26th, 2015 10:24am
You are good enough. Your family obviously does not see the value in each and every individual. coming from a challenging childhood with my parents all I can say is that the sooner you learn to live on your own and worry about whats good enough for you is when you will start to see that its not so much whats good for them but whats good for you. It's your life not theirs, so why worry so much what they think?
December 20th, 2014 4:42am
Above everything, the only person you need to worry about being "good enough" for, is yourself. Once you establish the fact that you are, whether or not you are good enough for others becomes irrelevant.
April 17th, 2015 8:31pm
Family have high standards for each other. Plus they are always around and they know who we are and what we do. It is not always that we are not good enough, but that we do more for the family than they, so jealousy may play a role. Before you start judging yourself, try to understand the emotions that are going around the family and why.
Anonymous - Expert in Family Stress
November 12th, 2015 9:49am
You may not feel good enough, they may make you feel inferior, and they may not understand how to support you. But never ever judge yourself on someone's inability to see your value. You don't need confirmation by anyone else, as long as you accept yourself, that's all that matters.
February 1st, 2016 12:49am
You're important, it's just a illusion, you need to know your family love you and care about you ... just need to believe in yourself
November 16th, 2015 10:25am
YOU are good enough...We just don't always fit the molds that our families want us to fit. We come into the world through them, but we are not always like them. Each of us have to follow our own path to find our destiny. Sometimes it does not fit the family plan.
February 25th, 2019 5:31am
Who said you weren't good enough for your family ? In fact, who said you weren't good enough at all ? On which criterias do you consider yourself not good enough ? Let me tell you that there is no such thing as someone who's not good enough. We all matter, and we all have a role in life. I understand if you're finding dificulties with your family, but This is not a reason for you to cast yourself as not good enough. You are good enough, you are good and i am sure you are brave enough to fight back and speak up What you truly feel. Feel free to contact one of the listeners or talk to your surroundings about it.
December 6th, 2014 7:45pm
No one is good no one bad. You can still be good if you want to be good enough for yourself and your family. Don't wait for the right moment to change yourself.
December 31st, 2014 1:53am
No one is ever "good enough" for everyone. You have to keep yourself happy by being good enough for yourself.
November 26th, 2014 1:53am
You will always be good enough. Family can be complicated, just remember you are unique individual.
January 17th, 2017 8:23pm
If someone no matter how close a relation is making you feel that you aren't good enough, then it's not worth the effort. The bottomline is that any feeling of self worth should come from within but as human beings we do need someone to validate our thinking, or our opinion of ourselves. But that is the second step. Why you are looking for others to acknowledge your worth even before you know yours.
January 21st, 2020 7:14am
It is because your family has got some unrealistic expectations of you. They gave birth of you expecting that you will be something different than you are now or you are going to be. Every parent has got an image of their desired child and how they wish their child will grow up and if their expectations aren't met, they can be upset and disappointed over their child when child reaches certain age, but not accomplishes what parents wished. For example, if parents wished to have a child who will be musician, but it later turns out that their child has no interest in music, but has interest in sport, parents' expectations aren't met and parents are disappointed over their child and child senses that they aren't good enough for their parents or family.
December 27th, 2014 3:16am
To anyone who told you you are not good enough, they are no better. Never forget you are worth more than the value you place on yourself and besides life is too short to be small.
April 9th, 2018 2:21am
You are....sorry if they don't show you.... But you are.... You need to look in a mirror .... See the you that you are! And know you matter.... Trust one thing... When your gone.... You still won't know your good enough....cause you won't be around to see their please love yourself...and know your worth .
December 22nd, 2015 12:40am
If you feel you are never going to be good enough for the people in your life, you need to ask if they are good enough for you. Ask yourself what it means to be a good person. Live by the deals that you set for yourself, not by the expectations (good or bad) of others. You may not be able to be good enough for them, but you can be good enough for you.
July 25th, 2016 10:10am
You are you just need to speak to your family about your problem and they will tell you everything you have worried about is not true
July 3rd, 2017 5:50am
Family structures can put pressure on people to succeed, as well as make people vulnerable. Your family probably loves you, sometimes it's just difficult to show it.