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I asked my boy friend does he love me, his response was I don't know. What should I think of that?

3 Answers
Last Updated: 12/22/2020 at 5:03pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
Moderated by

Maria Wasielewski, Master of Arts in Counseling and Guidance, University of Arizona

Licensed Professional Counselor

I am inspired when working with clients, who are facing challenging life experiences, to be able to help them to develop the needed skills to live their best possible life!

Top Rated Answers
May 12th, 2018 5:54am
well for some people the love word is kinda sacred and not at all easy to say, and even though they might be feeling it or at least close to, they'd be very careful with such a word. On any account it's not a thing that can be pushed, he'll say it when he feels ready and he will mean it then, so you better not pressure him. However do try to ask him and understand what are his current feelings for you.
September 10th, 2019 7:54pm
It seems like he isn't sure of his feelings yet, and he may not be able to put how he feels into words. His feelings may show more truly in his actions and attitudes than in his response to you, especially if he wasn't prepared for the question. It can be terrifying to put your heart out there, and it's brave of you to have done so. Sometimes love takes longer to form for some people than for others, but with time and patience and care, you can find the right choices to make and questions to ask as you continue in your relationship.
December 22nd, 2020 5:03pm
Your idea of love and his may be different. Communication is key, and it would be helpful to both of you to sit down and discuss expectations and feelings frankly and openly. It's also important to keep in mind things like age, affection style, romantic expression, and to address any trauma that could possibly be an impediment to understanding feelings or processing them in a healthy way. Likewise, if one or both of you are on the spectrum, picking up on feelings and how things are 'supposed' to be can be especially difficult without very explicit and direct communication. I hope this helps!