I was sexually abused for a decade. Now trying to enter into a relationship. I can't even hug the guy... What can I do to get through my past so I can enjoy my future?

4 Answers
Last Updated: 08/06/2019 at 5:43pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
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Raifiel Cyril, Masters in Applied Psychology


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Top Rated Answers
February 21st, 2018 12:07am
It will be a long and bumpy road ahead and some days will be worse than others but you need to keep pushing no matter how hard it gets. You mention entering a relationship, if you love and trust your partner and you believe the feelings are mutual, be honest, tell him/her how you feel and if they really care about you they will help you over come this. Just make communication very key in the up coming future let them know when you feel uncomfortable, upset or whatever you may be feeling at this time. Try not to hold in all these emotions that you are feeling as they can boil up and get worse. If you don’t feel comfortable talking about this to them, talk to a love one, family member or friend maybe. Have a positive circle around at all times, people that make you feel good about yourself for who you are. Your Barriers will be up for a period of time and anyone would understand that considering what you have been through, and anyone who cares about will be there for you throughout all the hard times you make encounter.
April 23rd, 2018 5:05pm
I think its really important to let yourself time. You are still healing - and you will be able to accept the past one day, but dont rush into it
August 20th, 2018 10:28am
We can't erase or redo the past, It already happened and I understand what you are feeling now :) but not all people are the same :) and your current is different from the person that sexually abuse you :) try to give a person a chance and start again :) not every one wants to abuse someone, focus on what's good today and prepare for future, nothing will happen if we still choose to ve stuck on the past, Yes it happen and it makes you traumatized but make it as a reference for today and future so that you have to avoid it on present or in future. Again Give another person a chance qnd focus on today and the future.
August 6th, 2019 5:43pm
Did you already tell him? That's the first step I think. If you are ready to talk about it then tell him enough so that he can understand why you are reluctant to be touched. If he does not know the reasons he will maybe misunderstand and this might hurt your new relationship. Telling him will give you (and him) some time to build trust slowly. And when you are read to tell him everything, then do so. Talking about it helps! Good luck for your recovery and All the Best. . . . . . . . . . .