Part I: The River - Exploring Life as a River
Welcome to part 1 of the Way of the River series.
We are going down the river of life in our kayak. At the start, it may feel unnatural or a little clumsy. Maybe we lose our paddle or get stuck on rocks, but with more experience we gradually learn to read the water.
With a little more experience we can begin to feel the current pulling us. Sometimes we might not want to follow the current. Instead, we might have our eye on a beautiful spot across the water on the side of a river bank. Many of us will work really hard to cross the river to get to that spot. It will require a lot of extra paddling because we are going against the current.
One sad, but instructive experience happens when you finally make it to that hoped for spot and realize it is not as good as you had imagined. You were sure it was going to be beautiful, but somehow it fell short of that beauty. This is frustrating because it took so much energy to get there.
Some of us are stubborn, slow to learn, or both, and we have to make this same mistake many, many, many times.
Eventually, however, we too learn how to read the water and follow the current. Sometimes the current leads us right past the spots we wanted to go and then surprises us around the bend with a far better spot. These are great situations. Oddly, even though we shouldn't, we often give ourselves credit for finding the new spot, when most of the credit should go to the current. Still, these are great times and should be deeply enjoyed because they do not happen all the time.
Other times the current can lead us down more treacherous waters with rocks, eddies, and sticks that can be tough to navigate. Sometimes we lose a paddle, flip the kayak and get wet. In particularly tough times, we may even get injured. We don’t usually take “credit” for our role in these situations and instead happily blame the current.
Why do these more challenging times happen?
I believe they happen so that we can learn. Nobody wants to feel the anxiety, difficulties, and sometimes pain that happens during these times, but these are indeed the times that teach us the most skill. We don’t learn to become master kayakers when the river is smooth. We learn how to be master kayakers on the rapids. Adversity challenges us to overcome.
So, what is the right approach?
The approach is one that goes against our natural impulses. It can sometimes feel like it goes against everything that is within us, especially when it is painful and not what we had hoped for. The stoics were master kayakers and they have a statement, “the problem is the path.” They encourage us to steer into the challenges and to trust the current. Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) encourages us to see the challenge as an opportunity to learn to solve a problem that we’ve been ignoring. These are wise words.
Abraham Maslow, another master kayaker, tells us to go further. He instructs us to see the challenges as a gift, to embrace them like we would a friend, to listen deeply and carefully to what they are telling us, to listen to their whispers. He encourages us to see the challenges as ends in and of themselves; and warns us not to look past them as a means to an end. He wants us to see and appreciate them for what they are – independent, difficult, and beautiful experiences.
The river of life brings us smooth, deep, and troubled waters. Thankfully we do not paddle alone. We find other kayakers on the water that also teach us lessons. Most of the lessons come down to following the current rather than insisting on our own plans. This key lesson is a lifetime lesson.
Reflection question: We have all gone through challenging times, or rough rapids, and overcome them in the past. What would you tell a friend going through difficult waters now?
I’m thankful that I have found all of you on the river. Thank you for paddling alongside me 🙏✨❤️.
This post is part 1 of The Way of the River Series. Find the complete information and all related posts here
Reading the theory is just the map, but the real progress happens in the water. Apply to join the exclusive closed group here and kayak together!
@GlenM
i could tell them: You are strong willed. Look at what you’ve gone through and came out with things you wanted and needed. Each day gets better. It can take time and practice but things do work out. You have the motivation to succeed.
@peachThinker662
That’s a beautifully supportive message. It acknowledges resilience, progress, and the value of persistence without minimizing the difficulty of the journey.
@peachThinker662
Beautifully put 🥰
@peachThinker662 Every single thing you just said here is beautiful! With a response like this to a friend, I can just tell that you make an amazing one. Your love, support, and encouragement here is just so sweet. I hope that whomever needs a reminder and pick me up comes across your post. It's just beautifully sweet. Awwww. ❤️
@peachThinker662 things DO work out! Reminds me of that saying, "everything will be okay in the end. if it isn't okay, then it isn't the end."
@peachThinker662
I love how you focus on using past experiences as proof of inner strength!
Wut a lovely post!!
@adaptableTortoise745 I totally agree! I'm reading soooo many beautiful responses! I ❤️ it!
Haha Ikr…I enjoy reading them as well…
@adaptableTortoise745 Same here! ❤️ I haven't got a chance to go back and seen but since you're here with me now--- I'm curious. What would you tell your friend going through a hardship, Tortoise? 😀 Care to share?
@adaptableTortoise745
I have loved this series 🥰
Haiiii queen!!!
@adaptableTortoise745
Hope you are well 😊
@GlenM
What would you tell a friend going through difficult waters now?
I’d tell them: look how strong you are to have come this far, even when you felt alone. You are strong enough. It’s okay to fall, it’s okay to take things slow and one step at a time. You’re not alone in this, even if it feels like you are right now. I know it’s really hard, but it won’t stay this way forever. It will pass, someday.
@Ailuraphilelove8tear9
What warm encouraging, supportive words for a friend!
@Ailuraphilelove8tear9 Awwww, I can tell this came from the heart! Sooo sweet. Any friend of yours would be lucky to have such a caring, supportive friend like you. ❤️ I'm so glad I read your post, because I'm taking your words with me today. Serves as a wonderful reminder to all. Tysm for this!
@Ailuraphilelove8tear9
A beautiful response 💜 🥰
@Ailuraphilelove8tear9
That’s genuinely beautiful — it’s warm, steady, and honest.
To make your message more focused on providing comfort, explicitly mention that your goal is to support and reassure your friend during this tough time, so they feel your genuine care and understanding.
“I know things feel heavy right now, and I’m really sorry you’re going through this. But look at the strength you’ve shown just by getting to this point — even on the days you felt empty or alone. You don’t have to rush or ‘be okay’ right away. It’s completely alright to slow down, to rest, to fall, and get back up in your own time. I’m here with you, truly. You’re not alone in this, not for a single step. This moment won’t last forever, even if it feels endless now. There will be steadier days again.”
@GlenM I seemed to have cried while reading this profoundly moving piece. I, too, have stood on a paddle boat and felt the meaning behind every subtle, thoughtful line. Thank you so much to the author — this writing reminds me of many things I need to reflect on
@considerateHemlock4227
It's really great that you resonated so much with this! The paddle was also a strong symbol for me. It represented times in my life where I felt I were drowning, in life, in chaos, in grief and I reached out for a paddle, a paddle was my family, my friends, counselling! Best decision I ever made. Life is like the river, it ebbs and flows,bits deep but we can paddle through it, one day at a time 🥰
@Amanda84 It seems we were born to eventually take firm hold of our own lives, with our own paddle. I wish you strength and steadiness always!!
@considerateHemlock4227
Thank you.
I appreciate it and express the same sentiment for you 💜
@Amanda84 ohhhh how cute! I love it!
@MistyMagic
🥰😁
@considerateHemlock4227 this is so true...taking our own paddle is so scary but also so liberating at the same time.
@GlenM I am a fan of Abraham Maslow, his pyramid I refer to many times, it reassures me, supports me and makes me understand to get my ducks in a row before I can build up the pyramid. But, I could never truly believe that some events that caused turbulence in the river were beautiful experiences. Maybe one day!
Thanks for the opportunity to flow along your river! ❤️
Abraham Maslow, another master kayaker, tells us to go further. He instructs us to see the challenges as a gift, to embrace them like we would a friend, to listen deeply and carefully to what they are telling us, to listen to their whispers. He encourages us to see the challenges as ends in and of themselves; and warns us not to look past them as a means to an end. He wants us to see and appreciate them for what they are – independent, difficult, and beautiful experiences.
@MistyMagic
Thank you for the reference to Abraham Maslow 🥰
@Amanda84
@MistyMagic
Such a helpful graphic, thank you 😊
@GlenM
The analogy I'd use regarding a river for my life at this moment is a slow but calm current. It had been hard to get across until I dropped stepping stones and learnt how to Cross with help 🥰
@Amanda84 what a beautiful and deep image. I love this!!
@GlenM
Thank you 😊
@Amanda84
I see you. You reply to seemingly everyone under the sun. You are ever present and positive. My goodness, how do you do this? What an energetic force of nature you are.
Here’s a Rose of Appreciation for you!
@CalmRosebud
That's beautiful. Thank you for your kind words! I just try my best to let people feel heard 💕🌹
@CalmRosebud well said! I see you too CR! Bringing your roses and light to us. Reminding us of the beauty of nature 🙏
@GlenM I would say to a friend, Some days are going to be good or even great, and other days are going to be really hard. On those hard days, you just have to tell yourself to keep going until you see the light at the end of the tunnel because this too shall pass. It is okay to not be okay. It is okay if some days your best is getting out of bed just to move to the couch or brush your teeth and go back to bed. It is okay. And trust the process. I'm not sure about you, but I believe there is a reason and/or a lesson in everything. Trust in the universe's divine plan because you never know what kinds of opportunities are being opened up for you in any given moment. The universe has your back. Trust the process.
@enlightenedRiver2413
Trust the process!
Wise words 💜
@SelfCareJourney
@CalmRosebud
So calming 🥰
@SelfCareJourney
That’s a really comforting message — gentle, real, and full of hope.
@SelfCareJourney love this: Trust in the universe's divine plan because you never know what kinds of opportunities are being opened up for you in any given moment. The universe has your back. Trust the process. -- a great way of capturing WotR!
Sometimes it helps to visualize...
@Spiritriver I was just telling H that I'm loving these images you all are sharing. They feel like little breaks for my soul. Thank you 🙏
@GlenM
What would you tell a friend going through difficult waters now? I would say: "Just hang on there. Believe that God/Jesus Christ will help you.
My story on the river: Well, lol, I don't paddle anymore. With severe CFS/ME (cronic fatigue syndrome) I just have to stay in the boat without paddling where the current (my energy) leads. What I can do is to ask God/Jesus Christ for my situation (lying on the bed or the TV-sofa) and ask Him for help on my way.
@Helgafy
I like that, I go where my current/energy leads me 🥰
@Helgafy glad you are feeling the love, support and care, and staying in the boat. smart!
@Helgafy
I really like this. Just staying in the boat, letting your current lead you where it leads you. I Love how you're letting God lead you where He wants you to be in your life. This really is incredibly beaitiful 😊
@PressContinue
Thank you so much friend. So - I have to trust on God/Jesus Christ. How silly we persons are who think that He cannot lead us step by step. He who created the heaven and the earth and uphold His creation each day. Must we more and more understand His great love for us, His creation.
All the best from Helga.
We have all gone through challenging times, or rough rapids, and overcome them in the past. What would you tell a friend going through difficult waters now?
It sounds like you are going through a difficult period. I am here with you and I believe in you overcoming this.
@calmingcomfortero
@calmingcomfortero
This is a beautiful way to comfort a friend. Being there for someone in need is always important 💙
@calmingcomfortero
Communicating that belief that they will get through it, and that you are here with them, is so comforting, and I can imagine it might help them to start believing in themselves more too!