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What's the best way to open up around new people?

19 Answers
Last Updated: 09/13/2021 at 4:25am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Brenda King, PsyD

Psychologist

I treat life changes, women’s issues, and issues of aging using evidence-based treatments with healthy doses of warmth, empathy and humor to enhance healing and growth.

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
January 4th, 2015 10:40am
I find the best way to open up is to be funny. Try cracking a good joke, and everyone will want to hear more of what you have to say :)
Caotn97
November 24th, 2014 6:35pm
The best way to open up around new people? Well the best way to open up around new people is to just be yourself and things will happen on their own. Don't push yourself to open up if your not ready to as you will open up to someone when you feel ready to. We all have different ways of opening up so do it in a way that you feel most comfortable doing so.
gracefulSoul71
September 13th, 2021 4:25am
The best way to open up is to simply listen! Often times I get so nervous around people that I get stuck inside my head. When I focus on listening and understanding the person, the pressure is off me. Focus on the other person. Be curious about the other person. Once you do this, you will likely feel more comfortable! The conversation may happen easier. In addition, the other person will pay the favor and also ask you questions about yourself. If you pay attention to what the other person is sayings and have a real interest in learning about them, you will feel less pressure on how you present yourself.
Chitchat8
April 13th, 2020 6:18pm
When you are starting, it can be helpful to find people who have interests or hobbies similar to yours. Joining a club is one example, where people who are shy or awkward might have an easier time meeting like-minded people. They can find and connect with others who have the same likes and can talk about the same things. If you are doing an activity together it gives you an easy conversation starter. If you can get the other person talking about themselves it can give you some time to loosen up in the conversation. It's a great way to learn how to start talking more openly with others when you aren't the one having to do most of the talking. This is also a good, authentic way to get to know someone. People love to talk about themselves.
Jfreind
July 30th, 2019 2:51am
Great question! I've always found the best way to open up to people is to ask them questions about the things they like to do for fun. How do they spend their free time? Finding common interests with someone is always a great way to "break the ice". Try and ask questions that are related to your interests. For example, if you like movies ask "whats your favorite movie"? Or, if you like music ask "what's your favorite song"? People like to talk about the things they enjoy. If you find it difficult to talk, ask people questions, they will be happy to do the talking the majority of the time!
Anonymous
October 16th, 2018 10:29am
Always look to the positive, make sure your not hiding the best of yourself and try to find something good with each person to connect with, a person to person not a faceless scary encounter. Take your time, it is not a rush but a journey. Jokes are always a good start but if that isn't your natural way then do what feels comfortable to you and ask them about themselves, listen to their story, then when your comfortable offer yours. Never forget they are people just like you and may be just as u sure as you are.
arctictrinity822
June 4th, 2018 4:25pm
Talking about something that makes you happy and that you are interested in (music, sports, etc.), asking questions, smiling, even just paying attention to your own body language can help you look friendly and open to talking to new people.
Anonymous
February 13th, 2017 1:08am
Be brave, and just go for it. It takes new for old to exist. There are so many great people in the world. Just imagine that they are your close friend.
Victoire
February 9th, 2016 6:43pm
To remember you don't do it to abide by social rules, but because of that wonderful spark of human curiosity that can brighten the most boring or dreaded moments : what can I learn from this fellow human being? What makes this person special? What little bit of me will this person carry, even inconsciously, what little bit of the other will stay with me? A light joke, an interesting fact, a feeling, a question, a dream, a thought? Or just this tiny bit of the universe I couln't see through my own eyes?
Anonymous
December 28th, 2015 11:53am
Just talk to them and be social by saying," hi, I heard that you are new here, how are you?' Just do that and get close to them to be friends with them
Bamachick
December 7th, 2015 3:29am
I always just walk right in up and introduce myself and see where the conversation goes. If it's not going well, I just say alrighty then and move on to the next person. I'm usually not too shy to just confront a stranger. My mother will always say "She never meets a stranger".
Anonymous
December 30th, 2014 12:59am
Remember that those people are not there to judge you, and that you have a right to a voice around these people.
breathOFlife
December 24th, 2014 6:36pm
The best way to open up is ask questions, and then find common ground to converse about and then grow from there.
Erynn
December 19th, 2014 6:57am
This is very individual. For me, small talk is important, as is time. I say hi. I respond when people say hi. I ask about their day and schedule and events that took place in their day. I ask about what they like and enjoy and we discuss hobbies and interests. This happens (typically) over several meetings if it is informal, but if we were meeting up to hang out this tends to happen faster. We start to talk about things that bother us, but aren't too serious (like an annoying boss, but not our mental health) and talk about more personal things like goals and family. Eventually, if we have clicked well, some relationships progress to another level of deeper intimacy, but this does not happen for all relationships. The key to starting a relationship though, is just being curious about another person. Saying hi and finding out what they've been up to on a very surface level is where most relationships seem to start.
JesseK1022
December 7th, 2014 5:05am
Honestly? For me? Alcohol. lol. I know it sounds dumb but alcohol can reduce your inhibitions. Likely around new people you feel some level of fear. Fear of rejection. Fear of opening up and showing what a dummy you are. Opening up is hard but you don't have to do it all at once. It can help a lot when you are able to find out what they like. You don't have to go all in and start telling them everything about themselves. Find out what they like and start talking about that! Who loves talking about their own interests right? So find out what they like, talk about that stuff with them and they will love you.
Brunski
December 1st, 2014 5:29am
just be yourself, try not to set out to impress people, rather smile, try to relax and introduce yourself, ask how the other person is going or people are going.
Mayaisthename
November 28th, 2014 6:16pm
Be yourself, I know that sounds cliché, but it's true, you'll only want people to like you for you.
Honey
November 25th, 2014 4:08pm
The best way to open up is to be a receptive and interested listener. Instead of listening to respond, you should try to listen to understand. This will help you avoid misunderstanding questions or gestures based on your anxiety and see the situation for how it is.
chamomilecompanion
November 24th, 2014 7:08pm
I think the best way to open up around people is to start with talking about things you have in common and then dive deeper into the topics to reveal your thoughts and opinions and be open to hearing their's as well.