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How do I deal with abuse from a family member?

19 Answers
Last Updated: 07/31/2018 at 11:11pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Jessica McDaniel, LPC, LCPC

Licensed Professional Counselor

I have been practicing cognitive behavioral psychotherapy since 2007 with a diverse group of adult clients with various diagnoses, all races, and socioeconomic classes.

Top Rated Answers
January 3rd, 2015 6:15am
You don't. If a family member is physically abusing you, you need to get a third party involved ASAP. Whether it's the police, a coworker, a counselor, a teacher, a neighbor, anyone. If it's emotional abuse, some thing. You don't just sit back and deal with it. You need to take action to stop it from continuing to happen.
October 23rd, 2014 9:50pm
express your feelings to them about it, and if it's serious call 911 or a hotline that deals with the kind of abuse your enduring and be careful!
October 28th, 2014 8:44pm
You should tell someone immediately! It's not good to get abused by anybody, especially by your family.
November 4th, 2014 12:25am
Tell an adult you trust. Whether it's another family member, a teacher, or a public official. If there is no one that comes to mind, call a professional hotline, and they will tell you what steps to take. Once you recognize that you are being abused, you need to seek help and remove yourself from that situation immediately.
November 9th, 2014 10:26pm
tell another family member. family is suppose to help you, let them take care of you and get you out of that uncomfortable situation
December 15th, 2015 3:36pm
Respect their age and remember the family bond between them :) and make up your mind that abusing from a family members mean to do good not harm
October 30th, 2014 2:54am
Go report it to an adult; a principle, your parents (if its not them), a guidance counselor, and let them know whats going on.
November 8th, 2014 5:49pm
YIKES! Always talk to a trusted adult in these situations. If you know maybe a trusted teacher, school counselor, your own therapist, aunt/uncle, or even your parents in some cases. I'm sure they would be glad to help, listen, and support you through this hard time! xoxo ~Emily
November 9th, 2014 1:18pm
You can tell someone about it. Or, if you dare, tell the family member that you know it's not okay what they're doing and that you'll take steps against them. If they continue, take those steps. You can tell a parent from a friend, they might be able to help you, or a trust person at your school.
May 28th, 2015 4:37am
I think the best thing to do is to tell someone. You don't deserve what is happening to you. You deserve better. You deserve to live a happy life: Abuse free.
August 11th, 2015 8:05pm
Refer to the National Domestic Violence Hotline for your country. In the USA, it is 1-800-799-7233 or
August 14th, 2015 9:28am
It depends on the nature of the abuse, its severity, and your relation to the family member. Getting an occasional earful from your mother-in-law is vastly different to being beaten by a parent and fearing for your life. If you feel safe enough to do so, it can help to talk to the family member and explain the effect their behaviour has on you. They might not realise that their behaviour is abusive. If they understand and want to change, you can work together as a family to end the abuse. If you feel unsafe, it's probably best to get help. It might feel like you're betraying your family member, or letting your family down... but ultimately, your safety comes first. If it's appropriate, you might be able to mend the relationship later. The sooner the abuse ends, the sooner you'll have the chance to rebuild the relationship in a healthy way. Abuse from a family member is always difficult to deal with. If you're stuck in a situation where you have to ride it out, remember that things do get better. You can't choose your family, but you can choose your friends, so build up those relationships that give you the support and love which you deserve.
August 18th, 2015 6:59am
Do not let them abuse you. If you are being abused, tell someone immediately. Seek immediate help from someone that you feel can do something about it. Find a hotline or just find someone close to you.
November 29th, 2015 2:56am
If you feel as though youre in danger I strongly encourage you to contact a hotline that is available for your geographic area
July 4th, 2016 2:39pm
I'm sorry that someone isn't treating you like you deserve. People cope with abuse differently, but only you can make a change by getting help from someone you trust or seeing a counsellor.
August 9th, 2016 6:18pm
This is never an easy situation and as I am sure you are aware needs to be dealt with carefully. This is why I would recommend someone who is trained and certified to deal with these situations appropriately for everyone's safety and benefit.
September 19th, 2016 3:50am
How bad is the abuse? If it is an abuse that you have to report please do so, you can do so to your school counselors or close family member that you can trust will help. Else if you are staying with that person and you are under age to leave then try your best staying away from that person. If you can leave or stay away from that person will be good.
October 3rd, 2016 2:04am
You can speak to someone from the family or someone that knows how to deal with those stuff. But is good to speak up.
July 31st, 2018 11:11pm
Tell a trusted adult. If you're not comfortable with telling them and you feel they will be upset, contact a hotline. Hotlines are easy ways to tell someone how you feel. Just remember, you're not alone and your parents will never hate you because of this.