Listen to what they have to say, but don't insert yourself into the equation. Be non-partial and non-judgemental, but also be there for the person venting. It's hard not to take sides but with practice it's possible.
If I feel like I can handle a person talking negatively I will listen to what the angry family member has to say, but stay objective and not do much more than listen, because I do not feel comfortable with picking sides in a situation like that.
It's really a matter of personal opinion. Maybe you agree and want to vent with them, maybe you like that person and feel hurt/offended/obligation to tell that family member. You should do what you feel most comfortable with, whether it be telling them that you'd rather not discuss it, suggest another form of venting, engaging with them, or just sitting there and nodding, the choice is yours.
If it makes you feel uncomfortable, tell them. I think being honest is always the best way to handle this kind of situation, and then suggesting they have a conversation with the family member they are having problems with.
I have had to deal with this situation so many times in my life. Try to allow the other family member to vent out their anger, and when they are calm speak with them about other ways to solve family issues. Both family members should be able to talk things out together at some point and resolve these issues. As family you shouldn't be putting each other down behind each other's backs, which can happen if one family member is angry and says things they may not mean.
We all need someone to talk about our feelings, within family or out of family, if some family member wants to angrily vent to you about another family member, just listen to it with patience and calm, it doesn't mean you have to agree , if the speaking tone seems too uncomfortable to you to bear , make it clear to that member,...a person after few minutes of vent out, get calm down on its own,and begin to think about the issue more rationally.
The response is in your question. If it were me, I would just hear him/her out ... not agree or disagree with what he/she has to say but just to be fully present, listen to them and provide him/her the space to ventilate. If you're worried to be dragged into these family feuds, perhaps, let him/her know that you don't want to get involved but will just take out the time to listen.
When one family member talks angrily about another I would say let them steam a little. Just because they think something about a family member doesn't mean you have to. We will always have our own opinions.
Remember that it's just a vent. Let their opinion not affect your view of the other family member. Practice controlled emotional involvement, if that's difficult, remind them that you cannot be involved in the conversation without actually being involved, so politely excuse yourself
I listen to them until they are finished. The least that they need is a set of ears that are willing to hear them out rather than a string if advices that's more likely to be judgemental rather than helpful
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August 14th, 2018 2:20am
I would allow this family member to vent to me. I would know my opinion of each party and wouldn't allow another family member to change my mind. But allowing this person to vent may be beneficial to them in helping them cope with whatever issues they are having.
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