Someone yelled at me and I couldn't yell back, how can I vent?

21 Answers
Last Updated: 07/09/2018 at 2:43am
1 Tip to Feel Better
India
Moderated by

Serene Sarah George, Diploma in Counseling Skills (DCS)

Counselor

Mental health counselor who believes in supporting people to think through their emotional challenges and empowering them to find resolutions or effective coping mechanisms.

Top Rated Answers
Pam
October 26th, 2014 6:53pm
I find venting to a trusted friend or family member very helpful. Writing how you are feeling can help get your feelings out as well.
Yarrie
September 11th, 2014 2:44pm
Unfortunately, someone yelling at me has served as my greatest form of humiliating experience. Everytime this happens, I usually go to a place where I can be alone and then cry, or shed tears. Then I always write down, "You could have told me in a nice way, why yell at me?"
FrancescaGabrielle
October 23rd, 2014 2:24pm
Feel free to private message me or any other listener you feel like you could have a connection with on the site! All chats are confidential and non-judgmental, safe zones. If you feel like venting to one of us could help, it doesn't hurt to try! :)
TheRawarGirl
October 10th, 2014 1:17pm
Talk about why that makessyou upset, and does it actually matter about how that person yelled at you? Will you ever see them agian?
Anonymous
October 23rd, 2014 8:28am
From my experience I have learned that yelling back and forth doesn't make situations any better. Which is why it's better to resist yelling back, and instead leaving the area if possible to have time to reflect and calm down for when one yells at you it can cause strong negative reactions. It's better to take a deep breath and count down until there isn't any negative abrupt urges.
AgusD96
October 25th, 2014 6:29pm
Violence is never the answer. Fighting back just makes things worse. You can vent on here, with frinds or relatives by saying to them all the things you would've liked to tell the other person. Once you're calmed down, you can go and talk to the person that yelled at you and explain your feelings
kittykat
October 30th, 2014 8:12pm
Are you seeking ways to communicate with the person who yelled at you, or ways to vent about the experience? If it's the former, getting the person into a conversation in which both of you are able to calmly discuss your points of view is probably the best course of action -- you two can see where the other is coming from, and work out a solution to ensure that the frustration doesn't happen again. If you simply need to vent about the experience, that's what 7cups is here for! Journaling is also a great outlet for frustration if you're not up for talking to an actual person. Playing repetitive games and drawing can also be soothing. Experiment with different forms of self care to see what works best for you.
Wes2
November 4th, 2014 8:45am
This is a very common problem. Vent to a friend, do your best to move on. If the situation permits, sit down with the offending party later and explain to them why you didn't appreciate the way they spoke to you, and that you would like them to pay you the same respect that you do them.
Anonymous
November 8th, 2014 4:36pm
From my personal experiences, fight or flight always works. If you can't yell back, take flight! By that I mean to do some form of vigorous exercise. Even brisk walking will ease your anxiety and get rid of the feeling of needing to vent.
sofia17
November 16th, 2014 5:41am
writing, punching a pillow, drawing, writing them a letter and throw it out, poetry, telling a loved one
Marina727
November 19th, 2014 6:10pm
Yell into a pillow, talk to a good friend, write an angry letter to the person who yelled at you (without sending it)
Anonymous
March 26th, 2015 10:40am
When someone yells at us it is human nature to feel embarrassed and angry by it. You can always come to 7cups and talk to a listener if you would like to vent.
Banven
April 10th, 2015 2:07pm
If you are feeling frustrated, angry and like you need to get it out, you could do a number of things: 1. Learn to do some relaxation techniques. These can help clear your mind and will calm you down. They are great for your overall mood and they can come in handy in any situation. They can also be done anywhere, are free and can don’t require any effort. 2. Join a gym, go running or do something physical, basically just exercise it out of you!. Not only will the frustration help your determination but the endorphins released will help your mood. Also, you'll get fit as a bonus! If you constantly feel angry and/or frustrated then why not take up boxing, kick boxing or a martial art? Just remember to save your frustration for your sport. 3. If the gym and exercise isn’t your thing, you could take up singing. Why not join a band or, if you’re not too confident and you don’t think you’re a very good singer, join a local community choir - There are some excellent ones out there who cover pop tunes and by being in a choir you can hide behind other people! Singing is proven to be therapeutic and is a great way to get rid of your frustration. 4. Talk about it. Why not speak to the person shouting at you and ask them to speak to you, rather than shouting? Easier said than done but this may nip the problem in the bud. We all need some “constructive criticism” now and again, if you can get it in the right way it’s much easier to take. Whatever your choice, just remember that a minute or two of being shouted at may make you angry, upset or frustrated, but in the grand scheme of life it’s just a couple of minutes of your life. Don’t let it get you down too much and try to avoid that situation again so you can remove yourself from it. Take up one (or more) of the 4 options above, you’ll feel better for it anyway.
originalLion57
June 4th, 2015 7:16pm
Talk to someone you can confide in about the situation and how it made you feel and consider going back to the person to say that you've thought about what happened and you'd like to say something.
BubblyDoll
June 29th, 2015 10:11pm
You can go alone in your room and scream, listen to hard music like strong letal, hit your pillow, write about your feelings or simply talk about it to someone.
Gi
August 4th, 2015 7:27pm
Write a letter for the person, saying everything you wish you said, but dont send it. Its a good way to let it all out without hurting someone else
LilMsMagic74
August 31st, 2015 6:44pm
I find keeping a journal helps me in these situations. I also release some of my energy in productive ways at the gym or batting cages.
AngelicHeaven001
October 26th, 2015 4:59pm
You muse talk to them in a calm tone. Speaking directly in a soft tone can help the person calm down.
Anonymous
November 24th, 2015 1:35pm
I wish people would realise that I am here to help them, but I know if I am to really help them then I must stay there through the unpleasantness and just listen to them.
Greatlistener87
May 10th, 2016 2:40am
You can give yourself some space from every1 and in your personal space scream or yell do whatever u need to release the anger. Screaming back at a person that is already screaming to u will not help solve or cool anything. So not screaming back was the right thing to do in that situation.
MarissaSlack
July 9th, 2018 2:43am
You can try writing it all down! Or you can try talking to someone about it! Some people even take up a sport to get their frustration out. Whatever works best for you.