Personality Disorders Support: Discussion & Forum

Hello Personality Disorders Subcommunity.

Our priority is making this a safe space for those who have personality disorders. 

Please help us create and maintain a supportive and safe environment, by following these guidelines:
Note: Underlined texts are clickable links.

• Please be respectful of others and their opinions, even if you disagree with them. Avoid conflict or arguments. If something occurs that feels disrespectful, please send a message HERE with a link. 

• Please don't use moving GIFs or extremely bright colors out of respect for our users with hypersensitivity. Static images and text with neutral colors are okay. 

• Please let the subcommunity team know if you need anything. Let us know what works for you and what doesn't. Share any ideas you have that would make this an even more supportive place for you.
  
  Guidelines on Trauma and Abuse related content.

• Please use the Trauma Support Subcommunity as it is more fitting to get support for abuse related issues.

• Please add a TW (trigger warning) mention at the beginning of posts where a potential triggering topic is addressed. Examples of potential triggering topics are abuse (in any form: emotional, physical, sexual, etc.) and self-destructive behaviours (for instance, self-harm).

• We do not condone the use of the term “Narcissistic Abuse” please replace it with “Emotional/Financial/Physical/Sexual Abuse” instead.
  
  

Guidelines on Family and Relationship Issues.

• Please use the Family and Caregivers Subcommunity for family issues as they are able to provide you with more fitting support.

• Please use the Relationship Support Subcommunity for relationship issues as they are able to provide you with more fitting support.

• If there is a thread with a generalization or stereotype in it about those with Personality Disorders, it will be:
  1) Edited in lieu with the following guidelines.
  2) Deleted if they cannot be edited.

• Threads where support is required for family or relationship issues with a PD will be moved to Trauma Support, Family and Caregivers or Relationship support subcommunity where it best fits.

• Supportive or neutral threads like “How do I support my partner with PD” can remain in their respective forum sections.

• Discussing personal issues like “My partner has NPD and it’s really difficult to cope with their diagnosis”, communication issues, stigma and other such issues are allowed in their respective forum sections.

Please be mindful of how your words may affect people with personality disorders. Avoid using language or labels in a way that is stigmatizing, stereotyping, invalidating, or generalizing. Explained in depth below:

General guidelines to be inclusive:

• Use people-first language, such as “person with personality disorder” or “individual with personality disorder” 

• Be ethically responsible and mindful of how your post impacts people with personality disorders.

• Do not label individuals and don’t use labels in a derogatory way or with a prerogative meaning.

• Avoid phrases and language that excludes people with personality disorders or place them into an outgroup. Example: “These people with Personality Disorders” or “They who have Personality Disorders”. Please instead use “Those with Personality Disorders” or simply “People with Personality Disorders”

Guidelines to follow when explaining a personality disorder:

People often borrow from psychological texts to explain what they perceive to be a personality disorder. 

Reminder: 

A psychologist or psychiatrist is a trained professional and their activity of segregating types, symptoms, severity of disorders, etc. is conducted from a diagnostic perspective. 

Issue 1.

We are not trained individuals. While we may try to offer helpful information, those descriptions can be disparaging to people with personality disorders.

Issue 2.

Oftentimes when such distinctions are explained by people who do not have lived experience with personality disorders, these distinctions portray people with personality disorders in a negative light.

❌Please do not:

• Promote labelling individuals, especially based on perceived differences; it is not helpful and only an individual can label themselves. 

• Cater content towards those who are not people with personality disorders, with an intent to defame, malign or slander people with personality disorders.

• Promote stereotypical images of what individuals with personality disorders are like. 

• Promote unhealthy standards of behavior for people with personality disorders.

• Invalidate the lived experiences of people with personality disorders. 

• Promote stigmas and prejudices associated with personality disorders. 

✅You can however:

• Critically represent data or engage in supportive discussions on psychological texts which are from credible sources and catered towards the benefit of people with personality disorders.

• Raise issues in a supportive way, promote self care, share coping mechanisms, start a conversation or share personal experiences.

Hence when threads conflict with the personal wellbeing or interests or an individual with personality disorders, these posts/threads will be corrected or deleted, under the following guidelines.

1. Unsupportive content including targeting or attacking other users in the community is not allowed. Disagreements may happen, but always maintain a respectful tone and try to move the conversation forward in an on-topic and constructive way. Sometimes this means agreeing to disagree. Click here for expanded guideline post

2. In order to maintain a therapeutic space, we delete forum posts that take away from a supportive forum environment. If a forum post is not helpful, nor positive, then it will be deleted. Click here for expanded guideline post 

Guidelines to follow when explaining symptoms of personality disorders:

The line between what is a descriptive symptom and what is stereotypical can be very thin. Hence we are sharing some rules of thumb to explain how you can stray away from generalizations and stay supportive. 

❌Please do not:

• Describe someone from perceived actions or behavior. 

• Assume or assert the personal motivations of an individual.

• Use emotive descriptive words which attribute malicious intent to the experience of a person with personality disorders.

✅You can however: 

• Highlight the internal experience of the individual.

• Identify that these symptoms are on a spectrum. 

• Explain critically the experiences of the individual who has these symptoms from their perspective.

• Use emotive words which describe how a person with personality disorder feels. 

When a thread does not follow the above guidelines and portrays any symptoms or individuals with personality disorders as abusers or in a negative light, they will be corrected or deleted under the following guideline:

3. Inflammatory, racist, sexist, offensive, homophobic, transphobic, etc. posts are not allowed. Posting about the impacts of abuse, racism, sexism, etc. or seeking support on these topics is allowed. Click here for expanded guideline post

If you believe a forum moderator has edited or deleted your post in error, you can email forum@7cups.com and we will investigate.

Note to Forum Leaders:
Appropriate action: If at all possible, the forum moderator should remove the unsupportive content while retaining the post. All edits should include the forum moderator’s name and the reason for editing (e.g. unsupportive content). In the event that the post cannot be retained, the forum moderator will delete the whole post.

Note to Group Leaders:
These guidelines will be followed in the Personality Disorders Chat Room as well.

• At first please gently nudge the conversation towards a supportive atmosphere.

• Gently correct any misconceptions, stereotypes or stigmas.

• Use your de-escalation skills as per the room supporter training to resolve conflicts if they arise.

• Gently explain or remind the speaker that their stance although with the best of intentions is not helpful or supportive to people who have personality disorders and this is firstmost a safe space for people with personality disorders.

• Please share the link of this page when necessary.

• Call a community moderator on duty if you need support; you can fill in the emergency form available in “Chatroom Guidelines” for the same.

• If a member still insists on seeking support regarding their issue, please refer them to a one-on-one chat or rooms such as Support Room 24/7.