How can I stop thinking about opinions of people which cause anxiety?
Last Updated: 03/16/2021 at 3:56am
Elaine Kish, LMSW
Clinical Social Work/Therapist
My goal is to treat clients with respect and compassion. I am a supportive, strengths-based therapist with experience in treating mood disorders, grief, and trauma.
Top Rated Answers
The easiest way to go about this is to realize that we define who we are, we are the ones in control. We should not let the opinions of others shape us. We control ourselves, and its okay to be our own person.
It's all about self esteem. When you work on that, you'll understand that the only way to be happy is to be independent and to listen to your instincts, and do what sounds right to you. Sure you can ask for opinions, it's even important that you do ! Because you might find truth in some of them, when they are constructive and honest... But don't give every opinion too much importance. Many opinions are often subjective and biased. Just trust yourself, above everything else.
You cannot ignore other people but you do not have to dwell on other people opinions. Everyone has the right to their opinions that does not mean they are correct.
Build up your self esteem. When you feel good, you don't care when people put you down. Easy for you to say, you may think. But YOU have to live with YOU the rest of your life, and why live with someone who constantly cares what others think?
People never really accurately know what another person thinks and feels about them. People have their weaknesses
You have to learn not to care what people think about you, some of them are jealous of you, so they might be trying to bring you down by their thoughts
Realize that opinions are just that. Opinions are also known as perspective. Perspectives can be right or wrong. You need to decide if what they have to say is constructive.
You may stop by realizing it's you who thinks those thoughts about others' opinions. Mindfulness & Contemplation work for me to cultivate stillness and let go of anxiety. Have you tried that?
Who you give priority to depends how you react to others words and acts.everyone does not care or love the way your close one does. Your family or parents only wishes tire welfare. The one who loves you the most on this earth is you yourself only. So what youthink and theperson who lives you, cards for you say that matters only. So it's just better to think this wa. people don't control your life. Neither their words control yourlife. So let go of those words coz you have to move on.
Just think about your own opinion, because your own opinion is what matters. You can ask other people for their opinions but in the end its your choice whether you'll listen to their opinion or not, some may cause you to think a lot about their opinion because it may be a negative opinion about you, just expect what others may suggest to you because anxiety will always occur unless you expect things on a different view like being optimistic.
That's a really hard thing to do, but since you're asking, I'd bet you're strong enough to do it. You just have to realize that the only opinion that matters is yours. Any time I would get upset about someone else's opinion, my therapist would ask me, "Prove their opinion makes a difference in your life." I never could do it. Well, he's my dad. "So what?" So he's really important to me. "So what?" So his opinion should matter. "Says who?" Says....I don't know who says. "So, does his opinion matter?" Well.....Since I can't prove it DOES matter, I guess not.
You can try doing some reality checks if you're worrying about what other think of you. Ask yourself questions like: is that actually what they think of me? am I sure I'm not making it worse than it is? is there any evidence to support how I feel? evidence to contradict it? even if it is the worst case scenario, can I make it through? By grounding your thoughts and worries, it can make it easier to handle and to get past.
Those need to be replaced with good thoughts or motivation to have the good views which helps a lot.
This for sure takes time and practice but it will get easier the more you grow as a person. Try to love yourself as much as possible, you will gain more and more confidence each day. The more confident you get, you will care less and less about the opinions of other people. After all you need to try to remember that only the opinions of the people close to you should matter, so try not to think too much about opinions of people who don't matter that much. Just try to build your confidence and forget about people who don't care for you and you will be fine.
You may not be able to do that successfully. However, to effectively modify that behavior, I would think of why you need to worry more about your own opinion of yourself. YOU are the one who has to live with the consequences of what you do, not your opinionated acquaintances. YOU must be the one to feel sad or upset with how you choose to be. So be happiest self, not beause someone told you to, or because you think it might make them like you more, but because you are getting comfortable with loving the real you and because opinions are not going to pay the bills, so who cares what those opinions are going to do with your life at the moment you need encouragment and not discouragement?
Most people care about what other people think of them. You are not alone. Try to figure out what is important to you and how you feel about whatever it is that you were talking about. Don’t be closed minded. Understand that there is no right or wrong opinions and try to understand the other persons opinion. Maybe whatever this person is saying will change your mind about whatever you’re talking about.Don’t try to make the other person wrong. Try to relax and have a dialogue that will possibly lead to new opinions for both of you. Try to relax your body and your mind as you come across opinions that are different from your own. Be as flexible as you can be
As someone who can relate to what you are going through this anxiety can be extremely stressful to face. It’s natural to persistently worry about how others see you. You know yourself better than anyone else. Think what makes yourself feel comfortable and the sensations you associate with feeling comfortable. Was there something you practiced before and with time you showed improvement? Reducing the feeling of anxiety can work in the same way. What about thinking of the things that make you feel anxious in terms of hierarchy? It can be public places, strangers, people you know or presentations. How often do you expose yourself to those situations? Please know you are not any less for feeling the way you do and it can be hard to challenge how you feel others perceive you especially of you do not know them well. You might want to ask yourself what information are you taking in that is indicating what they think of you. Is it their verbal or non-verbal communication directed towards you inducing your anxiety? Please communicate with one of our listeners on our site or a mentor if requiring an open-minded approach towards your thoughts and feelings. Self-help guides as well as mindfulness exercises are available on our site too for further support. What we see, think or feel is sometimes not as it seems. It’s ok to have doubts and want these doubts to be explored.
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