Why does it feel so hard to accept depression as an illness that can be treated instead of punishing yourself for not being ok ?
Last Updated: 08/24/2020 at 12:06pm
Lauren Abasheva, LMHC
Licensed Professional Counselor
A sex positive, and kink knowledgeable therapist with an open mindset and a clear understanding that we are all different.
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it's difficult because depression is normally seen as a mood like when people say that they feel "depressed" when in fact they're just having a bad day and it's sometimes difficult to realise that you're not okay when it could just be a bad day so you punish yourself because you think you're in a bad mood when in reality you have a very treatable illness
Because depression slows down what you are able to think about and accomplish and traditionally that was thought of as being willful or lazy or some other character trait. At best it was thought to be a "lack of motivation" so it requires a change of thinking from the very same organ that is affected by the illness. Your brain has a chemical imbalance that makes it even easier to beat up on yourself, and so it can be like swimming upstream to accept a new train of thought regarding all these things that you learn, but its worth it.. just keep at it.. keep reinforcing it.. eventually it will stick and you will remember that it is an illness not a flaw of character and you will be able to move on to other parts of the onion and peel them away too.
Because accepting that your own mental state is currently ill is a whole new level. You will feel as if you were insane. and depression already causes low self esteem.
Because for me personally, it makes me feel weak. I feel like I should be able to deal with it myself and be strong enough to beat it without help. And it is harder when you feel like you are the only person who is going through this issue.
"Punishing yourself fo not being ok" is part of depressive thinking and part of the depression itself. Don´t beat yourself up for beating yourself up (so to say). You are depressed, you are most likely angry with yourself. It´s okay and part of depression. Take your time to heal.
Depression can often be characterized by individuals experiencing the illness as an internal problem that they are responsible for rather than a obstacle many of us face that can be overcome, especially with the support of others.
I think there's so much social stigma around any illness that can't be seen by others, that we sometimes feel embarrassed to admit it to others and even ourselves. Unfortunately I think a lot of people judge others by appearance, and if we appear to be alright then they find it difficult to believe that we aren't. It is really important to realise that depression is a medical illness, though. It is nobody's fault, there may not be any simple cause or simple solution, but being open to understanding our illness and seeking help, therapy, medication, whatever method works for us, is incredibly important if we want to get better. There is nothing to be ashamed of- you wouldn't be ashamed of a broken leg, depression is just the same except others can't see the damage.
Because people falsely believe that they should be happy because everyone they see on TV are happy, or their friends seem happy, but everyone has problems and every has low points. It's okay to feel down and depressed, and it's okay to have clinical depression (a chemical imbalance of the brain), keep talking to people, and you'll realize that you are not alone and neither are your experiences.
I have the same problem. For me, I hope you won't apply that to yourself unquestioningly cause for you it may be completetly different but it is my view. I see it the way if it is a proper illness then I'm hopeless and can't do anything execpt for waiting for some magical cure (as nothing worked properly yet) so it makes me even more depressed. And when I see myself as lazy and moody I feel aweful I am this way but also it gives me hope I can fight that cause it's only my "bad behaviour". Unfortunatelly I end up only more depressed cause I never manage to take that chance I see in "not being ill" so I guess it's better to accept depression as an actual illness and not losing hope for recovery anyway :) I know it's easier said than done and I haven't managed that myself yet but I hope you will do or at least my explaination will help you somehow, take care :)
in my experience i think we put too much pressure on ourselves to just get on with it instead of asking for help, we may feel embarrassed or that we don't deserve help. we might think we are being silly and that we don't want to put a burden on anyone else. its a very difficult step to take, accepting that you have an illness and you need help.
You should never punish yourself for something that is difficult to fix. It all begins with mentality, wanting a better life for yourself. Support of others is appreciated but it all starts with you.
Thats human nature, most people feel like "normal" is something you can never achieve. But your true normal is just what you want it to be. Its who you are
This is a very good question. It is hard to accept because sometimes we want to blame ourselves. We have to realize that depression is an illness like asthma or diabetes and it is not anyone's fault at all. This takes some time.
For two reasons. Because depression makes you feel like you deserve to be punished and it makes you feel bad at the same time, so logically you feel like depression is your punishment. Because depression is comforting, like a blanket, and it's hard to let go of. It feels like a friend, the only friend that understands you.
Everyone sees depression differently, and that's because we've all had different experiences with it.. some lucky people have none at all! ;) Depression can be treated and this is scientifically proven, so keep a smile on and don't punish yourself - you've done absolutely nothing wrong for feeling this way, and it's not your fault!
I think it feels this way because depression is not something usually talked about it society. People might walk into your classroom saying, "I sprained my wrist yesterday!" but it is very, very rare for someone to walk into your classroom saying "I had a major panic attack yesterday." In society, it seems like everyone's perfect and happy. Everyone seems to be loving life. But some people don't love life, some people are really insecure and sad. But, the best thing to do it just think "this isn't my fault." Because it's an illness, just like cancer. You don't blame yourself for cancer or the flu, so depression is the same thing:)
Humans have innate ability to be stubborn and prideful. Those attitude hinders us to fully understand what is happening. We tend to overlook that sometime we need someone else's help in order to get through each day.
In my experience, you can feel in denial about depression as you may have been nurtured with idea that depression is a 'first world problem'. The conflict of knowing you are depressed vs being told depression is a 'first world problem' can lead you to confliction and denial. You might be ashamed of being depressed too.
Because you feel that something is wrong with you. That you shouldn't feel this way, act this way or have these thoughts. Depression while an illness is also apart of you. Because it feels apart of you that means you take it personally for not being able to feel okay or to just get over it. It takes time to process it as an illness that you can treat or manage. It is okay that it takes time. :)
Depression is hard to accept because people with depression typically hate/dislike themselves. Accepting that it is a mental illness is a first big step towards treating it, but a mental illness implies something is "wrong" with you. Media and other people often insinuate depression is just "being sad" or say that the depressed person is lazy. This is not true at all, but it supports the depressed person's view that he/she is worthless. Remember that depression is an actual mental illness, just like bipolar /ADHD/schizophrenia. You are doing the best you can and that is fantastic
I think this stems from the fact that depression is still a taboo in today's society. We're so used to depression being labelled as us being 'lazy', or 'attention seeking' that ultimately we end up believing them.
I think one of the main things that makes this so hard is that society has such a negative stigma surrounding mental illness. If loved ones in your life think of it negatively or 'not real,' you might feel ashamed yourself in fear of disappointing others.
It feels hard because it is hard to go through something like that Even though it can be treated it is still a very hard and devastating time in life But when you get through that it is going to feel a lot different depression is some thing that my friend had suffered for a long time and even though she knew it could be treated it was something that she really didn’t like about herself and at the point where she was almost cured from depression it was the best time of her life especially when she got cured from it
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