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Why do adults act like children when it comes to arguments? They'll argue over the most trivial of things, like two toddlers who don't get what they want.

18 Answers
Last Updated: 09/24/2019 at 9:56am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
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I am a psychodynamically trained clinical social worker. I find assisting women and families through difficult times an extremely rewarding and collaborative process.

Top Rated Answers
DipityEnigma
July 14th, 2015 10:55pm
Stress. A huge build up of stress. Most adults build up all their anger, opinions and stress because they believe that they need to. They don't talk about their problems often and as stubborn as they are, they often feel that they don't need to give an explanation to anything. A lot of parents have the "do as I say" instead of "do as I do" attitude. They expect you to jump through hoops without question simply because you're their child. If not, they throw childish fits because they're afraid of losing control. I know some will disagree with this but as a young person myself, this is how I often feel when it comes to parents. A lot of adults don't seem to realise how they act though and often don't want to listen either.
Anonymous
March 24th, 2015 12:46pm
Some adults just don't know how to argue, they think that because they're adults they're entitled to win the argument, regardless of how childish their argument is.
originalLion57
June 4th, 2015 2:16pm
Age doesn't necessarily reflect someone's maturity level. Sometimes children or teenagers can be more understanding, smart and patient than their own parents.
tazrulz
June 12th, 2015 2:47pm
All adults have a child inside of them that is ready to jump out of them. Whenever we get in an argurment it is only natural to revert back to this behavior. It is not natural to be in an argurment and be an adult.
Cody23
April 30th, 2018 5:17pm
I think the reason why adults act like children when arguing is because they put their emotions before their evaluation of the consequences.
Anonymous
March 24th, 2015 11:00pm
I'm not really sure to tell the truth. But I have a theory or two. Maybe neither party wants to be wrong, or maybe they cannot see the merits of the other person's veiws.
cannoninvienna
August 17th, 2015 6:10am
Sometimes adults can argue about things that they are passionate about. This can result in them thinking back to how they though when they were a child. It can bring out a side of them that is more immature, since they are wanting to be correct and wanting to "win" the argument. I think that people sometimes argue like it is a sport because they feel like they have to prove something to others. They want that kind of approval and respect, and they think the way they will earn it is by arguing until they get their way.
HelpWisely
August 15th, 2016 8:01am
This is because majority of adults around the world are not mature at all. They may have aged but their mental thinking or intellect is still way behind their age. They take everything seriously not playfully and naturally as children do.
Anonymous
April 10th, 2015 1:42am
Hahahah ..I am laughing as this question reminds me of someone ..close and also about myself ...well everyone knows how to defend themselves and when someone argues about something you dont agree upon and you dont like it you likeable become defensive and you want to win the argument by being offensive ...its ...like ..this for that or .....like say ..you were once a child in your life and ..adults do act like children when it comes to arguments....arguments are conflicts and it can be hard to overcome but end of the day its not the end of the road....maybe try to be assertive ..be more ..open and honest to each other listen to your side and their side and then decide together....and what you agree and disagree and how can you put up together to agree points..not what you disagree points it helps ...and compromise is a word where a both person agrees upon which is good!
Anonymous
April 16th, 2015 4:22am
Adults were children once too. Part of being an adult is overcoming that childish side of you when in an argument, the selfishness of only thinking about one side of the argument. To truly be an adult you must do your best to understand both sides of an argument instead of being hard headed and saying what you say goes. Adults aren't perfect either trying to become that level of maturity is hard, after all we are human, and humans make mistakes.
Anonymous
December 29th, 2015 2:12am
Because it's so much easier than just agreeing and saying sorry. The worlds a crazy kinda place!!!!!!
Anonymous
January 25th, 2016 7:15pm
Sometimes the argument isn't really about the little trivial things. Sometimes it's about something bigger and one or both of the adults don't have healthy ways of resolving conflicts and tensions so that they don't end up fighting like toddlers over the little things. The big things can be hard to talk about and require both people to sit down and focus and work to resolve it.
Greatlistener87
March 21st, 2016 4:32am
Sometimes people can only react to situations/ rather fights in your case the only way they know how to. Maybe giving them some knowledge on how to deal with the situations will be a good thing to help them to react better.
Meowkindcatmeow
March 22nd, 2016 2:02pm
Since adults are supposed to have authority, be wise and knowledgeable from past experiences, and are looked as being someone who has total control of their life and situation they tend to see things in one way. By not budging and standing firm on any and all topics with the "correct" answer that they panic and don't want to be seen as a lesser or failed adult.
jovialCat69
May 31st, 2016 5:31am
I feel that there is a childish character in anyone that never dies. That lives with him or her till the end of his life. We may have been civilized to suppress our childish behaviour but the child is inside always and can appear unconsciously in the form of an argument always
JeshuaMorbus
January 30th, 2018 5:58pm
As an adult, i can say to you i don't feel that much different as i was a child. And that's basically it: the difference between a child and an adult is that an adult is a child without anyone supervising their emotions. Believe it: we don't ever grow; just get different interests and responsibilities.
Anonymous
April 3rd, 2018 12:18am
Adults do act like children not because they want to behave that way many times they are trying to voice an opinion or an emotion that is true and people are not willing to listen they are not giving the time of day because perhaps the other side either got burned out or does not want to recognize what is like to take part in a relationship especially when it's jeopardizing a relationship no person wants to lose out on a beautiful relationship but unfortunately sometimes behaviors like this to happen even to those who are the best behave. And even under trivial ones well that's a whole different issue it may be due to attention as children or should I say lack of attention as children it could be that Mom and Dad were always working and that child was always alone and has tried and tried and tried to make things work on his own. But no matter what if the person recognizes that he does need all side help even if it is a woman they should seek counseling to overcome moments like these in the future
AuralMaster
September 24th, 2019 9:56am
Usually if the argument seems trivial there is a deeper underlying issue, especially if nothing seems to resolve it. Emotional intelligence is lacking on one or both sides of the argument. They're trying to express themselves, and they either don't know how to properly, or they aren't sure of what their underlying issue is; either way is a form of miscommunication. There are 2 reasons it seems childlike: 1 - it is, children usually haven't developed to the point where they can discuss disagreeable matters in a respectful and indifferent way. 2- The emotional intelligence and perception of the spectator.