Why do I feel fine throughout the day, but once I slow down and try to sleep I become sad?
Last Updated: 11/11/2019 at 5:49am
Monique Bivins, MA, LPC
Licensed Professional Counselor
I have a real passion for helping my clients to overcome life's obstacles . My work with clients is nonjudgmental, supportive, and interactive.
Top Rated Answers
At the end of the day I always feel exhausted having done battle with the day and all the challenges it presented. As I take those first few moments to slow down, I think back over the day and maybe realize there's things I should have or could have done or said better, maybe things I forgot. And what builds from that, together with the feeling of exhaustion, is a sense of regret or shame. Depending on what it is that starts that feeling it can sometimes be hard to shake to the point of affecting actually getting to sleep. But it's always important to remember that the day is now in the past, that we're not always going to be perfect and while we can reflect and learn some important lessons, tomorrow will need us bright and bushy tailed, ready to take on new opportunities and learn more about ourselves, the world and the people around us. And for that you're going to need to get some sleep! :)
Most of the time your feelings are occupied with your daily day routines. Your daily business and interactions helps to keep your inner thoughts and worries at bay. But when you slow down and unwind, there is a vacuum in your thoughts hence all your worries and sadness fills it up. Frankly speaking, Do Not worry or fear this change . It is a natural process a lot of us go through. Feelings of sadness is just like all emotions that we experience : joy , happiness, peace, anger, fear and so on. Let it come and go naturally. Don't fight it. Make yourself a nice cup of hot drink. put on some music, read a book and go to sleep. Before you actually go to sleep , maybe everyday ,you could spend about 5-10 minutes, reflecting on the day's activities and saying how grateful you are for 5 things related to you. A lot of the time our memories of good things that happens to us gets suppressed by sadness because we naturally are more bothered by it. Also is is a great idea, to talk to someone and solve the under lying issues that gives rise to the sadness.
Because you are more likely to think about tons of things more when you are in bed alone. You are too busy during the day to stop and think about problems but once its bed time it all comes out.
bceause that is when your body is the most relaxed and you just want to start thinking about everything and thought always spiral to avoid it you should read a book or meditate before your bedtime
Throughout the day you're surrounded my many distractions! Friends, activities, learning, all your stimuli are constantly active, I'd recommend finding a relaxing night time hobby, like read a nice positive book!
During the day your mind is occupied with daily activities. When you slow down and it's quite, suddenly your mind becomes very loud and that's when there is nothing to distract you from thinking about the thing that has been making you sad.
You could be keeping yourself busy enough throughout the day that you're not focusing on how you're feeling. That's how I used to be. Usually when I go to sleep, I have music playing or something similar to keep my mind distracted so I'm not focusing on my thoughts and how I feel and such. Maybe something like that would help.
If we stay busy we don't have time to marinate on the fact that we are alone, or other thoughts of sadness. However, when we lay down and there is nothing to do, such thoughts easily creeps into our minds. I have had this same issues for years. I have learned that although it seems a bit silly, if I listen to music and cuddle with a teddy bear, it helps.
That means you are having suppressed sad feelings. Try to figure out what could be causing you to feel sad. It could just be a lot of things in general, usually from the past. So try to recall various significant events that made you sad. Then try to look at things from a different perspective by telling yourself that it's okay because it's over and that you will be able to have many good days to look forward in the future.
The logical explanation for that mindset is that 'lack of freedom', which is questioned by our conscience . If one is truly genuine,doing what is good and right,after the end of the day, our conscience part of our brain tends to remind us that we did not do anything for our glory and this tendency obviously makes us sad and frown.
Maybe it's not about the slowing down that makes you sad, but what's going on for you to make you feel sad. It could be a whole array of things going on that you're only processing once you stop and take time to wind down. When I was younger, I only used to cry about what was going on for me in my life at night. It was as if the calm and stillness at the end of the day caused me to think more about what was going on in my life, and express it in my own peace and quiet. No distractions, but just you and your mind. It might be an idea to try focus more when you do try to sleep but feel sad, what it is that could be making you feel so sad and work towards addressing it.
Our days are filled with activities and distractions that keep our minds busy. It's when the sun sets and darkness falls that we start to feel our sadness because the world is silent and the distractions are asleep. It's when our thoughts take over our mind.
The night is one of the most intimate times for some people, it may happen because you overthink about some themes, like death, feelings or even your daily problems. You could try to distract yourself with some media, like radio or TV, until you fall asleep.
Normally, throughout the day, we have things that keep our minds busy. Say for instance, at 6am you wake for school. You get up, brush your teeth, do your hair, wash your face, get dressed, eat breakfast then rush to get dressed. Then, you pop off to school and study, even talk to those around you. Once you get home, you're able to relax and settle down and finally, once it is time for bed, your mind allows your thoughts to wander. Wandering thoughts often lead to people feeling sad, depressed, even confused. It is easier for us to cope with our issues when we are constantly distracted by other things but once we get time to ourselves, that is when the emotions are at their highest.
Usually at the end of the day, when you're alone and have a moment to start winding down, all of those feelings and thoughts that weren't really processed during the business of the distracted day come flooding in. It is your time for reflection, giving these thoughts your full attention.
Throughout the day when we're so caught up with life, being surrounded by people and the happenings, we tend to put off negative emotions and live in the moment. At night when most are asleep and we're all left alone, away from the day's hustle and bustle, we tend to allow these thoughts to fill our mind. Perhaps you could try to journal down your thoughts, talking to a friend, or even keep yourself occupied with things you enjoy! Reading a book, catching your favorite movie or tv series to really unwind and relax from all that busyness you've gone through in the day.
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