When I'm angry, why do I always feel the need to hurt myself?
316 Answers
Last Updated: 03/20/2022 at 8:30pm
★ This question about Self-Harm was starred by a moderator on 5/12/2016.
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Top Rated Answers
actual pain can often take away the emotional pain that we can't adequately express. it's an odd dichotomy, yet a difficult one to suppress. I haven't yet found a way to withhold the initial instinct, yet when I'm able (and the operative word here is able, because I often can't) to say aloud (to whoever - therapist or goddamn stranger the hurt and anger and whatever nebulous fuckupedness I feel at that exact moment... I end up unharmed by my own hand.
Are you safe right now? I don't want you to hurt yourself while I try to help you with this. There could be many reason you feel the need to hurt yourself when your angry. Is it anger at yourself or because of something some one else did to you?
Alot of the times its just a resort to blow off steam, its typically not out of self hate or depression. I hope you get better dear :)
Maybe some part of you feels that you can release that anger bottled inside you by harming yourself.
Anonymous
December 20th, 2015 12:49am
Because it's like when someone else makes you angry you want to hurt them, so when you make yourself angry you want to hurt yourself.
When angry some may feel the need to control something. They moght feel that the only thing they can control is physical pain they bring to themselves.
Anonymous
December 20th, 2015 2:30pm
When angry, I think built up aggression becomes overwhelming and because of that we tend to want to express it by inflicting it on someone or something. The best thing to do is find an alternative source to release that tension, such as finding a hobby, like boxing. It's best to find another way to relieve yourself of the anger without harming yourself.
Anonymous
December 21st, 2015 1:01pm
When you are angry you need to express that anger somehow, in this case you maybe think that the best way to get rid of the anger is to hurt your self, but i suggest you: go to some sport club (box or just kicking something) or go to paintball, express yourself with some activity (write about it, draw, play something), :)
It may be because you have alot of pent up emotions, and since you're angry, you may feel destructive, and want to hurt yourself. This isn't healthy. Try talking about your feelings when you're angry; explain your side. It's never okay to harm yourself
Anonymous
December 23rd, 2015 9:32am
Maybe it's because you don't want to get angry with the people you like. Hurting yourself may seem as a good solution to control anger, but it isn't
Anonymous
December 23rd, 2015 8:46pm
Maybe your feelings might be bottling up then you finally feel the urge to release these feelings by hurting yourself. It might be a good idea to go counselling to help with your feelings of anger.
This is a coping mechanism to stress. It is easy to take the pain out on yourself because you are at your peak stress level. Although there are many more healthy alternatives that are less damaging psychologically.
Anonymous
December 24th, 2015 3:31am
Its because you feel angry at your mind telling you to hurt yourself, but remember mind over matter.
Anonymous
December 25th, 2015 7:39am
When i feel angry and have no one to blame for it myself is the next best thing. i blame myself and take it out on myself, and by hurting myself it relieves the stress, and lets it all out. i think this may be similar for you.
Anonymous
December 25th, 2015 1:49pm
This is probably because you are very frustrated but have no way to release it. You could try having a pillow to punch or stress balls, keep them near you. When you're angry, you can punch the pillow or use the stress balls
Because you want to get rid of your anger so you , take it out on yourself because you believe you are the one who deserves it but that isn't always the case talk to someone about your anger
In my experience the reason I have done such things myself is the fact that we often resort to things that are not scary for us, we often avoid things that are unfamiliar to what we know. Taking a chance and doing something different can be awfully scary.
I feel that I need to punish myself for something I have. Done wrong or for just being me. I feel like I am a bad person
In my case, I want to remember the pain on the inside. So I hurt myself so that I will remember. Some other people may feel the need to hurt themselves so that they can pretend to be moving their emotional pain to the surface instead of keeping it all on the inside. I don't know about you, maybe it's one of those few.
i feel angry and i don't know how to talk about it or how to get out and i am so angry at me that i just feel like hurting myself and i can handle the physical pain more then emotional pain but i am starting to change that for the better
being angry can make you feel a whole wave of emotions,sometimes these emotions become overwhelming , i always take a step back, take a few deep breaths and then clear my mind.
Anonymous
December 29th, 2015 7:09pm
Anger is a very strong and overpowering emotion and we feel the need to let it out on something . This is natural because it offers an outlet for our emotions and we tend to feel much more calm , relaxed , clear headed and not so overwhelmed once we have released this anger . Often we take our anger out on others , our surroundings or on ourselves . Taking our anger out by hurting ourselves tends to be especially relieving , so the urge to hurt or sometimes "punish" ourselves for what may have happened is often very strong . It's not to be recommended though , as it is an unhealthy and harmful coping method . Looking into alternative methods to release this feeling of anger would be a much better healthier way of coping with these emotions .
Maybe becuase you blame yourself for your anger and the pain takes it away. You should direct that anger so it doesn't cause you to hurt yourself and other around you. Anger can be a great motivation for sports, goals, etc. If you find this to continue, you should seek professional help.
because you keep blaming yourself for what's making you angry and you feel like it's the only solution to make yourself calm down ... stay strong
Sometimes we people feel as if our emotions take over us. But really we have control over everything. You may resort to hurting yourself when you are angry because you feel as if it is a way of releasing the feeling, but it's not. Try thinking of other things you can do to get your mind off of hurting yourself. Try reading, drawing, outside activities, hanging out with friends, etc.
Because you want to get away from the situation and when you hurt yourself it distracts you and makes you feel better and it should its bad for you.
Anonymous
December 31st, 2015 4:14am
Thats because when your angry you cannot control your mind..dont do anything stupid permanently just because you are temporarily upset.. Any decisions which you take when you are in anger would end up in hurting yourself or it would be wrong
you're putting your anger out on yourself, try to find something else to do when you feel like this maybe squeeze a squishy ball or use a punching bag, that way you won't hurt yourself but you can redirect your anger
It's your way to calm down. You're angry and so you want to calm down and you know that cutting will help you to do it.
Maybe you feel like it is your fault. Or you just need a way to relieve yourself from the anger on yourself.
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