How do you explain to people things around anxiety that impact on your life without them thinking your trying to be controlling ?
Last Updated: 06/15/2016 at 1:19am
Lisa Groesz, PhD
With evidenced based therapies, we find the root of the problem together to implement solutions. We all face crises, transitions, or disorders at some time.
Top Rated Answers
Telling people that you need a certain order in your life, lets them know that you have boundaries. It means you value yourself and your safety, so they can do the same.
Ask questions such as where do you mostly feel anxious? Or simply give some personal experiences on when you felt anxious and the. Ask if they have ever felt that way and if they do relate to it and say well is there a possible chance this could be the cause of your anxiety and if they don't relate ask if they don't mind explaining how they are feeling
You could try making an analogy. Use the example of someone who is allergic to peanuts: they have to take certain steps to make sure they don't become aggravated by their allergy. In the same way, if someone thinks you are trying to be controlling, you can tell them that you are simply doing what is best for you and that you are putting certain safe-guards in place to keep your anxiety (much like the peanut allergy) from being aggravated.
When explaining to people things about anxiety I've experienced without coming across as controlling, I find it best to: (1.) ask if it's okay to relate a personal experience, (2.) if the Listenee agrees, then tell my personal experience...Succinctly!, (3.) then, I ask the Listenee if my personal experience "makes any sense, OR NOT?" The "or not" is the key! It allows the Listenee a "way out," and enables the conversation to continue regardless of agreement upon specific circumstances. Therefore, this method does not come across as controlling! :-)
You do so gently. Do not say " Do not do that." Say " i am sorry but I have anxiety and being around(insert) Makes it a little worse, could you refrain from doing that while I am here?" It does wonders.
I tell them, what may happen when I am anxious. I explain the symptoms and the reasons behind it. I also tell that how I am coping with my anxiety without feeling ashamed of the symptoms. If people don't understand anxiety issues they may make wrong opinions about us. However, if we explain the symptoms and the suffering, chances are people will support more.
I try to explain how though anxiety is a perfectly normal and healthy emotion, for me when things cause my anxiety, since I have an anxiety disorder, it doesn't switch off. It builds and builds until it becomes completely overwhelming
First off you can't control what people think. People are going to think what they think no matter what. So the key is finding kind and understanding people. Once you have done that, make it clear that you struggle with anxiety and express that it is a very real and debilitating condition which has significant negative impact on your life that you'd like to make them aware of. The key here is being very clear in what you say. Sit them down, use a serious tone. Express the weight of the issue.
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