How can I tell my friends what I'm going through?
Last Updated: 07/16/2018 at 11:33am
Jennifer Fritz, LMSW, PhD
Clinical Social Work/Therapist
Day to day life can be stressful and overwhelming and my strength is assisting my clients in a supportive, empowering and practical manner.
Top Rated Answers
Choosing the right time and place, and the right words, to clearly and honestly express our feelings.
Its important to be open and honest to those that you trust and confide in; its okay to share some troubling issues and emotions with them; this is the process of relieving oneself and healing, dont be shameful or frightened; just take it easy, sit them down or call them up, and let them know that you need to get some things off your chest, and that their attention and consideration is greatly valued and appreciated. Then take it from there, express all that needs to be expressed; be confident and truthful with yourself and them. Take it step by step, go at your own pace; your friend will be there to support you.
By finding a way you feel comfortable with, it can be through text/call, writing it down or talking, or any other way you could think off, finding a way your comfortable with talking makes it easier to tell people how you feel or what's going on for you.
If you trust your friends, then you will know who you can open up to and how to open up. Once you start opening up the trust starts to build between you and your friends.
First of all, one must gain their friends' trust in order to share their struggles with them. This is a process that will probably take quite some time, but it is a vital element for a true friendship. After you have no doubts with your friends, you will probably find it easy to tell them anything. If you still find it hard to share your struggles with them, you can start a conversation stating that you want to talk to them about something serious. When the conversation begins, you could tell your friend that you have some struggles that you want to talk about. They will be there for you. You have nothing to fear. If they've proved that they are trustworthy, you can be certain about their loyalty and love.
Letting people into our inner-most struggles can be one of the most difficult things to do. I know this first hand, but in my experience the easiest way to do it is to just do it. Go to lunch or invite them over, somewhere where you feel safe and comfortable, and just let them know that you have something your dealing with that you'd really like them to know about. It can be scary, but if they are your friends they will be there for you, and it will all be ok :) If you ever need practice telling someone something you have never said before chatting with one of our listeners here is an awesome idea to help you have a practice run if you think that would be helpful!
Perhaps take a few moments to write down your thoughts, and prepare something beforehand. Organizing your ideas in the way may make it a little easier for you to express yourself to others.
Sit them down and give it to them slow explain everything clearly and carefully so they understand what you saying and ask for support about whats bothering you.
If talking is too hard, I try passing a note to them. And if that's too hard as well, I try texting them. If that doesn't work, I keep silent and hope that my friends realise something is wrong and they make the first move.
Timing. Make sure you choose a time to speak with loved ones when they are not battling their own issues or distracted by the demands of daily life. Perhaps reach out and explain that you want to talk to them about something that are happening in your life. Request a time to speak with them without distractions. Trust that you are loved. If your friends don't respond with love and support when you need them, you may be better off seeking new more supportive friendships.
Telling my friends the problems that I am facing is not a difficult thing to do for me. First, I would use a non-technical language for them to understand. Secondly, I would give every detail to my problem to ensure that there would be no confusion. Simple as that :)
Listen to yourself... do you want to tell it? do you feel comfortable with them knowing how you feel? Tell them that you want them to know how you feel and that its important to you to share it with them. if you trust these people there will be a place and time where you can tell them about your feelings.. if you struggle to find the right words dont be afraid of using metaphors... feelings are hard to describe .. maybe imagining talking to a kid can help to find the right pictures to tell about whats going in inside of you
You can sit down with them and calmly explain your situation. You can do this anywhere - somewhere that you feel comfortable being. You need the support, and they need to know or they won't be able to help you.
Start by identifying exactly what’s bothering you and why. This might help you when you talk to your friends later on. Try to think of the best and the worst possible outcomes of the situation before talking to your friends, as this might help you better pinpoint your emotions. When you talk to them, try to be honest to them, as well as to yourself. Good, true friends will always stay by your side, no matter what you tell them.
Make sure you talk to friends you trust and are comfortable around. Tell them the problem calmly and ask them what they think about it.
Let them know you are not 100 percent at the moment, try to explain your current feelings and how they may be connected to what your going through, explain what your experiencing and express your need for friendly support
Make sure it's your closest friend that you're very comfortable with start your normal conversation with your friend since your teacher close friend she'll know something's wrong with you by the look on your face if she asks is you tell her/him
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