Why aren't I getting better despite my efforts?

19 Answers
Last Updated: 04/16/2019 at 11:00am
1 Tip to Feel Better
Canada
Moderated by

Sara Radford, MA Clinical Counseling

Clinical Social Work/Therapist

Within the context of a supportive, collaborative relationship I help clients to explore themselves in a effort to create healing and lasting positive change.

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
April 16th, 2019 11:00am
Putting in endless efforts still won't help if they're directed in the wrong direction. That's what happens with hard work too. You may be working very hard but still not get results simply because hard work doesn't guarantee desired results - to some extent yes, it does but expecting to get results because you think you are working hard isn't right. Even a poor person puts in efforts, but do they see the result? Not completely. I'd say just be who you are. Set some realistic short term goals and work on them. Don't be so focused on the results and be convinced that you'll achieve it because you're putting in efforts. You don't have to do 'everything' in order to get something. You only have to do 'something' to get that particular something. At the end of the day, what matters is you tried and are still willing to.
TheresAPlaceForUs
March 29th, 2015 5:03am
I think that sometimes it's hard to see improvement from up-close, and that's it's easier to see from a far. I also think that sometimes we need to try something and if it isn't working for us, try, try again.
Anonymous
August 8th, 2015 6:01pm
When we water a plant..it gives fruits gradually but it does not mean we stop watering the plant.Your efforts are going somewhere..You just gotta hope and keep moving forward and not look back.You have already taken the biggest and the hardest step to get better-TO PUT YOUR EFFORT.Now all you gotta do is analyse yourself in every situation.I know its hard to do that but try it.Keeping a journal where you write down what you want to improve and how might help.I hope you getter better soon!
5ense
February 26th, 2015 7:17pm
I believe that getting better often does not just take effort. It is a long process, it takes a lot of time and support. Don't give up.
LilyFlowers
May 5th, 2015 6:30am
That is something you have to ask yourself. We can never get better until we truly believe we can get better. I'd say your not on the same-page with your inner dialogue.
kimoya
May 13th, 2015 9:16pm
everything takes time just continuing doing whatever it is that you are failing and in time you WILL get better
Anonymous
June 10th, 2015 5:40pm
Because you compare yourself to other people. Because you measure your efforts and struggles (your behind the scenes) to their highlights. Because you check facebook/twitter/other sites all the time. Because you don't see yourself taking bigger steps. Because you don't feel like you're doing much. Because the people around you are toxic.
TheComedyTragedy
July 21st, 2015 10:43am
It sounds like your trying, which is a great start. Good on you! :) Sometimes healing takes a long time and a lot of effort to make a difference. Keep at it!
Anonymous
August 4th, 2015 6:56pm
Time heals all wounds. You have to keep truckin' and keep your head up high! If you persist and you truly want to get better you definitely will. And trust me, You will be stronger once you come out of this dark period of your life :)
StandForFreedom
August 17th, 2015 10:22am
Things take time. Life is a marathon, not a sprint. I know you're trying, and you're getting somewhere, sometimes the finish line is just a little further away then we'd like to hope, but you're getting there, and you're getting closer! Hold on! Tomorrow will be a little brighter!
TheGreyFixer
September 28th, 2015 11:10pm
Sometimes the progress we make, we can't always see clearly, as we are so focused on a certain goal. Continue to evaluate yourself over time and you may see differently.
NeuroConfide
December 14th, 2015 3:09pm
Because you're not re-assessing your goals and what exactly are you doing to reach them. What metric are you using? What does "better" mean? When you find a metric, and your efforts are not paying off... you must change something (don't: try try again, instead: try to reach that goal in a (somewhat) different way, and always re-evaluate... did this change in my approach produce better results?
oceansunfish
December 28th, 2015 12:22am
You may have to try many things before you find what works for you. A lack of progress may be a sign that it's time to try something else. There are many different medications and forms of therapy, some might be better for you than others. Sometimes your therapist is a mismatch, and you need to find someone else. You may need to take better care of your body, or find a solution to a problem causing constant stress in your life. Stress and physical illness can effectively prevent recovering from depression. It's also good to keep in mind that a depressed person has a strong bias for seeing the bad and dismissing the good. If you try to remember signs of positive development, your first, strong impulse may be to deny any improvement has happened, dismiss any evidence to the contrary as meaningless, or just refuse to count real progress because you don't think it's enough. If you notice this is what you have been doing, try to be honest, realistic and patient. Even small progress is still progress. To say otherwise is to lie to yourself. It is natural to feel frustrated that you are not improving as fast as you wish, but that is not the same as no progress. Remember that even if you move slowly you will get there eventually, as long as you keep working toward your goal consistently.
JaxsonVice123
February 23rd, 2016 1:35am
You just haven't found your passion. Sometimes you aren't doing well at something because you don't feel entirely connected to it. Try different things to find your passion.
thoughtfulPomegranate86
September 6th, 2016 2:56am
It always takes time for things to change, if you are not getting worse and you are trying your best, then you are getting better :) You will see results soon, just stick to it and be positive!
bountifulPicture90
January 3rd, 2017 10:25am
sometimes we take longer to recover and the more we push ourselves and work in improvements it doesnt seem to make us get better. The main thing is that you start taking 1 step at the time, take a deep breath and be kind to yourself
Ashiya
February 7th, 2017 7:14am
Getting better at anything can take time, this includes mental health. Getting better at coding, art, or a job you're doing can take time. Your efforts will absolutely be worth it in the end if you don't focus constantly on getting better. Change happens overtime and you may very well be happy in the future with the outcome.
JustJoe
October 24th, 2017 9:18pm
Just because it doesn't seem like you're improving doesn't mean you aren't. Recovery is a slow and gradual process - it can take time to figure out what works for you as an individual and things that haven't worked aren't failures, they're steps toward something that WILL work for you. Just like you sometimes have to try on several pairs of jeans before you find the one that fits, sometimes you have to try several approaches to getting better before you find the obest that feels right for you.
Jennifer164
March 5th, 2018 11:43am
It will take time because it's hard(but worth it).Please try to appreciate yourself for all the efforts that you are making,you're doing great.So keep going cause you never know how close you are to your goal.And according to me,our efforts are more important than our success rate.In case you're really tired of pushing yourself,just take a break,give yourself a nice treat,pamper yourself and go for a vacation(if you're an extrovert).And if you feel its really hard for you to cope up with these things all by yourself then consider meeting a professional.