Why do I always feel so uncomfortable talking about my emotions with my parents?
31 Answers
Last Updated: 02/15/2022 at 11:10pm
Moderated by
Aimee Wilson, LMHC
Counselor
I am a mental health counselor licensed in the state of Florida. I have been fully licensed for 5 years, however I have over 8 years of experience in the counseling field.
Top Rated Answers
Sometimes it feels like your parents will judge you on how you feel and possible punish you for feeling a certain way.
You probably feel uncomfortable because you are scared of how they will react to what you say and how you feel.
Anonymous
February 17th, 2015 9:36pm
Parents often care so much that sometimes they have a hard time listening completely without first over reacting and so when we express our feelings, we are showing a vulnerable side to ourselves, which can be scary if we know they may not understand or approve completely.
Because I think they won't understand me, and they will criticise my choices. And also, I am not used to talk to them about my emotions
Anonymous
March 12th, 2015 6:48pm
I think sometimes sharing your emotions with your parents might make you feel like you will disappoint them in a way. And also most often times we think they will not understand. We also see that our parents are sometimes under a lot of stress and feel guilty that we will just be adding on to it if we do share our emotions and feelings.
Anonymous
April 26th, 2015 7:11pm
Often we feel that our parents does not understand us, and we are afraid that they might not be supportive
It can be hard to talk with your parents as a child/teen or even an adult. Try to know that most parents want what is best for their children and try to build that trust with them so you can feel comfortable. If you feel that is failing...then try to talk to someone you do trust to help you like a family member or counselor.
Anonymous
November 17th, 2015 9:31am
Well basically, it's because my parents thinking differs from mine. We have what people call a 'generation gap' and because of this parents usually are either unable to understand or help us out with our emotional problems. It's obvious that they have had different experiences throughout their lives but it doesn't necessarily mean that they have experienced the things we are and they just tend to get worried about us and maybe even try to help even though they are unable to (none of which is their fault either by the way).
I also felt the same way when i wanted to talk to my parent about how im feeling, i guess the though of how she would react frightened me but when i told her i was surprised that she actually understood me and helped me with my emotions. Hope that answer helped:)
You may feel scared of sharing emotions with your parents because they may have reacted negatively before, or they may not share their emotions with you making you feel that they don't have emotions (spoiler alert: everyone has emotions- even parents!). It's challenging too, because parents have authority which makes it feel less safe to share your feelings.
That's normal for anyone you just need to breathe and relax cause you parents have to know these stuff.
Anonymous
June 17th, 2015 8:38am
It's natural to feel that way, especially when there's a big age gap between you and your parents. Just take things slow, build up the courage to talk to them about the little things first; perhaps even spend more time with them and let them get to know you better. You will find it easier to talk to them about your emotions or really anything that troubles you if you feel comfortable around them.
Parents might not understand you as you are born in different generations and you’re scared they might not understand your emotions correctly
you Think that they have no idea on what do you personally feel, understanding that they are able to understand can be important
Sometimes we feel that we want to impress our parents, and we do not wish to disappoint them, thus making it hard to discuss something so personal. However, my advice is to be open with them because they will always love you.
It's what everyone feels, I face with it almost everyday. You can't talk about your every feelings to them. But believe me, they try their best to be there for you. They are the only persons in the world who'd be there to listen to you, who wouldn't lose hope on you when everyone slow seems to. They aren't the perfect people to talk about your crush or something but they are the best people to talk about your problems. Dad's are the best listeners for their daughters.☺
Because of fear of their reaction, thy can jugdme me or say angry things about me. The anticipation about what they are gonna say or do. The consecuences of my talk. In very rigid family enviroments talking about feellings is a sign of weakness and sons can hide their emotions not to feel weak or be seeing as weak. But it is the best thing for a boy to talk about feellings with others, to have a valve of scape. I realize that when I was older. An dwish my family were more suportive, but any way the past is the past and now I know the right behaviour, and besides my famuly was great in other aspects
I experience similar discomfort even to this day when talking to my parents about my emotions. I don't know your situation, but you should analyze your relationship with them and anything they may have said or done to you in the past that made you think you may have misplaced your trust in them. Work through this with them and tell them how this hurt affected your ability to trust them. I know I also fear mine thinking less of me for being "weak" or any some such. If that's the case for you as well, I'm sure they could never think that of you. If you're blessed enough to have parents that truly love you, they will always support you and you don't need to be afraid of them.
That's a very normal feeling. Whenever I am sad or having something going on it takes me a while to really open up about it. Although, I've gotten closer with my mom so I go to her about most of my problems. But with my dad, I just can't find a way to really explain anything to him. There's nothing wrong with that, some people are close with their parents and can talk with them and all, and some can't. Nothing wrong with that, and you don't always have to share your feelings to your parents either.
Talking about emotions with parents is often uncomfortable; it's completely natural. Because of the age gap and difference is life knowledge, they tend to judge and give answers that aren't comforting. They also may not remember what it fees like to be your age. You have most likely picked up on this, as have most. So it isn't a surprise that you tend to shy away from talking to your parents about personal matters.
Being vulnerable can be uncomfortable and opening up can be unsettling especially when it is our parents because we think they are going to tell us that we are supposed to feel A, B and C. However at the end of the day, they are your emotions, they are what you feel. If they cant understand or try to understand what you are feeling then its time to take a next step and find someone you can open up to. Our parents wont always listen, but you cant be afraid of being heard.
Parents can be a strange thing sometimes. You feel they will never understand. Try talking with them, I found that parents can actually help better then you may think.
It happens to all of us, talking about emotions is not an easy thing. It gets hard to not express emotions when talking about them, on the other hand we may not want our parents to know how much those emotions are actually bothering us. So when multiple factors come into play things become difficult and uncomfortable.
Anonymous
May 8th, 2017 10:10am
Talking to parents may end up with judgemental answers and this may not be expected . Also age difference and a some parents may have put pressure of becoming great may provoke spaces.
Sometimes I feel like they won't have the answers I need or they won't be able to relate but most often I am wrong and they say the exact right things to make me feel better and move on from my emotions.
Most parents don't want to accept that their child has something mentally wrong. They see it as they did something wrong with their parenting. So when you talk to them they don't seem to understand because they haven't experienced first hand. It's also a sensitive area for most people to talk about, since you are telling them whats wrong
Anonymous
July 18th, 2016 10:33am
Well your parents are probably the closest you have, it's like that to a lot of people. So you don't want to dissapoint them, Or let them think that there's something wrong with you, or that you're weak. You should understand that it's okay to talk to your parents, They're here for you, and they won't think badly of you.
i know what thats like. its because their first thought is to react out of anger and we all know full well that getting angry and upset with us doesnt help in the sightest. we cant control our parents reaction but try to say i dont want you to talk just listen, if you have already talked about it tell them ill tell you when you calm down i cant talk to you when you are upset with me
Anonymous
January 12th, 2016 10:29pm
Because you are afraid that they will judge you, or their reaction will not be supportive of your emotions. It's okay to just test waters and see how they react to you opening up to them... Also, if comfortable, when sharing a light moment with them you can explain to them how you would like to confide in them and it would help if they responded in a certain way - This might/ might not bring the anticipated change, irrespective of which you will know your equation with your parents.
Because you may feel that your parents are secretly judging and undermining you but that could be the case actually but on can never truly know which is why the doubt is always there.
Related Questions: Why do I always feel so uncomfortable talking about my emotions with my parents?
My father is having an extramarital affair. Part of me wants to end my relationship with him for cheating on my mom, but i worry that he will be depressed as he loves me a lot. How do I deal with this situation?How to connect a person online with a therapist?How can I make my family understand that I'm not seeking attention and just trying to get the help I need?What do I do if my father thinks I hate him even after I told him I don't?How do I tell my parents I don't want to go to church?What age is too young to leave home?How do I live with a mentally-ill parent?My dad likes to touch me. Is this sexual abuse?How do I deal with a religious family as an atheist?What do I do when my husband ignores me?