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why do I always feel embarassed to cry in front of people?

27 Answers
Last Updated: 01/11/2021 at 9:59am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Jennifer Fritz, LMSW, PhD

Clinical Social Work/Therapist

Day to day life can be stressful and overwhelming and my strength is assisting my clients in a supportive, empowering and practical manner.

Top Rated Answers
March 17th, 2015 3:35am
Crying is a perfectly normal, perfectly natural, perfectly human emotion. There is nothing at all wrong with it, however it is embedded in our mind that it is seen as a sign of weakness. It is unfortunate what society teaches as weak, as crying is a normal emotion that should be allowed to be expressed whenever and wherever necessary. Being able to cry and show those emotions is not a sign of weakness as society believes, but rather it is a sign of strength to allow yourself to express those feelings. Although it may feel embarrassing, everyone has a right over their own emotions and it is perfectly okay to cry in front of others. That is, in fact, a sign of true strength and inner courage ♥
July 14th, 2015 1:27pm
Crying in front of people is embarrassing because it feels like showing weakness and vulnerability, when we always want to seem strong.
April 5th, 2015 7:32am
Well I am not sure if you are male or female. But if you are male I KNOW WHY! Our society expects men to be brave, strong and masculine. Crying is seen as the EXACT opposite of that. But you know what, i respect a man who can cry. It shoes he at least has a heart and may be someone you want to talk to. So I say do it. Guy or girl crying is a good way to relieve stress and I say EMBRACE it!
March 10th, 2015 12:34pm
Crying is often considered as a sign of weakness. Most of us make an attempt to control our tears in front of people due to the fear of being labelled as someone who is weak. Its very important to understand that crying is an emotion and needs to be expressed whenever necessary.
July 6th, 2015 8:19am
I don't actually. I just cry. I remember going on walks crying, getting stares but i cried my heart out and felt better.
May 10th, 2015 11:24am
I am sorry to hear that you feel that way. However, crying is absolutely natural, and the most human thing to do. Only humans can express their emotions with both laughter and tears. When you cry, you cleanse your soul, and that is good for you. Do not feel embarrassed, you are doing absolutely fine
March 15th, 2015 3:32pm
While crying is perfectly natural, it is seen as something weak, especially when done by a man. Even a woman crying in public is seen as somehow lacking in the strength to keep it inside. The fact that people are seen by society as less strong means that it's obviously embarrassing. The only solution is for more people to stop caring what is accepted and start thinking about what would be best. Sharing emotions in public is a positive response. It should never be seen as a sign of weakness, rather one of strength. But feeling embarrassed to embrace that as a breaker of society's rules is perfectly natural.
March 3rd, 2015 5:35am
It seems to me that your obviously unhappy,possibly suffering with some anxiety issues either way it shouldn't hurt to see a councillor and seek further help
March 22nd, 2016 10:05pm
Usually people don't like to express their emotions in fear of being judged. It's normal, you aren't the only one.
November 21st, 2017 12:38pm
Because we have been hypnotised by our societies that it is wrong to cry. It is often perceived as a sign of weakness and/or childish. Some even few those who cry in front of others as being emotionally unstable. So it has to do with your belief about what it means to cry in front of people.
- Expert in Managing Emotions
April 25th, 2016 2:10am
It could be that you were brought up to believe that crying is a sign of weakness. Actually in the contrary crying actually helps u express yourself rather then keeping it all in. But if you need your personal space to cry then take it. You don't have to cry in front of people at all.
April 4th, 2015 7:10am
This is just a normal reaction. You can consider it an automatic reaction of your mind. Its because we usually do not show our emotions in front of others, specially when the emotion is negative.
January 1st, 2019 2:24am
Depending on what culture you grew up in, and how you were raised, you might have been taught that crying or showing emotions such as grief, frustration, or unhappiness are better done in private. Several factors including your parents' response to your tears and your friends growing up might also have contributed to you feeling embarrassed. However, there is nothing to be ashamed of. Crying is a natural, important part of expressing and feeling your emotions, and anyone who you might feel embarrassed of seeing you cry might also have cried at similar emotions. Are there any friends or family in your life who would support you expressing your sadness? If so, you could ask them how they feel when people cry in front of them. For myself, I have always found the ability to cry in front of people to be a sign of strength. A lot of people think it's easier to hide their emotions and appear stoic, but it takes a lot of strength to be able to be vulnerable and show your true emotions to the people that care about you. If you find yourself crying in front of friends or strangers, think of how you would react if one of them cried in front of you. Would you feel scorn? Or would you feel compassion and empathy for them, having been in their shoes? Your answer could be the same answer as the people who have witnessed you cry. It's alright to have emotions, and to express them with those you care about, you will be stronger and more capable for it, and might even help others feel safe to express them as well.
May 24th, 2015 1:40pm
It would be because of the we were rise by our family in todays society it has a big deal on our self esteem and make's us feel low or blue to do some thing like this in plicate
May 24th, 2016 3:05am
You might be afraid others will look at you when you break down and hide it somewhere else to not feel that their looking.
October 24th, 2016 11:37pm
Because you're exposing your weakest part. Just like how a cat doesn't like to expose it's belly because it shows you are vulnerable. It's very hard to cry in front of people and can be very unconformable.
July 14th, 2015 10:52pm
Because crying is portrayed as a sign of weakness, and human beings ten to want to appear strong in front of others. It derives from our primal instincts, when we were primates, weakness was considered a liability.
March 5th, 2018 8:39pm
Perhaps it is because you have not experienced being open with your emotions before. Some people I know get embarrassed when crying in me because it makes them feel vulnerable and weak or they don't like the attention that it draws to them.
October 5th, 2020 7:46am
It is natural to cry and show emotions, some do feel embarrassed about it. You are allowed to show feelings because your Human and it’s Natural to react that way. If you don’t it will hurt you Physically. Normally after a good cry you actually feel better and can get perspective. If it bothers someone else that is their problem. We can’t please others to hurt ourselves. This is your life and feelings if someone else doesn’t like it they can keep on going about their business. Life is to short to keep your feelings bottled up.
May 15th, 2015 6:03pm
Because showing emotions is not accepted well, because people then think you are weak...............
January 19th, 2016 11:10pm
I feel pressured to fit into the stereotype of "Manly Men". I left that idea of thinking and moved on into the things that made me different, not the same.
April 12th, 2016 7:01pm
Maybe because it can make people feel awkward to see another person cry or because you just don't like to be around people when you feel down.
January 8th, 2018 1:11pm
Maybe because you feel that showing your emotions or having a breakdown is a sign of weakness.Which is not true.
June 7th, 2015 7:32am
because society makes us think its not ok to show our true feelings or have opinions but i understand
November 10th, 2015 8:52pm
I guess it is just so that people don't think I am that weak and fragile person that they think. I want to let them know that I am so much more. That I am not only brave but also compassionate, that I can help people when they need it but also kick someones's butt if necessary. That I am so much more than just a simple girl.
April 6th, 2020 5:59pm
Personally, I would say it would depend on the way you present yourself in front of people. If you are the strong friend -the mom of the group or the counsellor of the group or you just present yourself as a very mature person- we find it hard to cry in front of people because it spoils the image we have created for ourselves. We don't want them to think we are weak or that they can't express themselves to us because we have our own troubles. That isn't true. Crying is not a sign of weakness and you shouldn't be embarrassed because what you are feeling is valid. You have been strong so long, sometimes you have to lift the pressure off of your own shoulders.
January 11th, 2021 9:59am
Crying is an extremely vulnerable thing to do, even on your own and so naturally you will feel embarrassed to show yourself this open and this vulnerable. It is important to take care of yourself when you are feeling like this and one way a lot of people feel better is to be with others. Although this may seem embarrassing and daunting, take reassurance in knowing that everyone cries! And know that you will feel so much better having cried with someone that you will forget you ever felt embarrassed to begin with. Take care of yourself and do what is best for you