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I have read that people with anxiety tend to see their present self extremely unrelated to their future self. How can I get closer to my future self?

13 Answers
Last Updated: 01/19/2021 at 2:54pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Tracy-Kate Teleke, M.A., LMFT

Marriage & Family Therapist

I assist adults and couples in CA experiencing relationship challenges and interpersonal struggles including anxiety, depression, and a myriad of other life challenges.

Top Rated Answers
February 2nd, 2015 12:43am
You will see the future self better if you learn to see your present self for who he/she really is. With all the flaws and everything good about it. If you accept you for who you really are, you'll have a better perspective about who you'll be in a short/middle/long time. If you have a grandiose idea about who you want to be, then you have to check if you're doing any effort to achieve it. If not, you better start working!
April 9th, 2015 3:41pm
By enjoying your present self. You cannot get closer to your future self without getting closer to who you are presently. How I see it, you are hungry for cake but right now you're working on the batter. The closest thing to cake (future self) is the batter you are working with (present self). Taste how you are doing now and that will tell you how you are going to do in the future.
May 6th, 2015 2:28am
I can tell you how I get closer to my future self. However I have known for years who my future self is, what my potential is. I know I'm meant for greatness. and that can seem like a million miles away. So what I do, is imagine my future self, what my future self feels like, acts like and I start accepting those characteristics and realities into who I am. I choose to let go of what is, what isn't who I am, for who I will be, who I truly am.
June 30th, 2015 6:07pm
Remain strong, be who you want to be, listen to what your heat is telling you and never give up trying.
July 14th, 2015 11:55pm
That's a tricky question. You can't actually get closer to your future self, you have to make your decisions on the present and that decisions will make you the person your future self is. Living with anxiety is hard, but you should try to remember to live the present, don't focus to much on who you're going to be in 5 years from now and these things, just do what you want to do, focus on the person you are now.
September 1st, 2015 4:55am
Try to think in your dreams, the things that you can achieve and that you would like to achieve, the past it's past, we can't change it but we can learn of it, learn to be better and how things that can be better for you, I know it's dificult but I also know that you can.
November 16th, 2015 8:49am
when we are realistic in thinking and in our approach we can get closer to our future self. its sometimes important to realise that what we see and hear from our thoughts are not the reality to what is going to happen.
December 21st, 2015 3:51pm
Being who you want to see yourself be in the future is the best way. Focus on who you want to be and what you don't want for yourself.
December 28th, 2015 9:06pm
work towards your goal, and don't stop until you get there. you're never too old to make your dreams come true.
January 18th, 2016 10:18pm
Dispelling your negative thoughts and working through your anxiety. I am a huge proponent of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. I think by using it, you will become closer to your future self; however, I do believe that it is bad to try and reach a future self. No one knows how we will be in the future. We need to look in the present and find things we would like to work on, and correct them. Looking toward a future self is not very beneficial, because we may never reach that goal and we will be let down.
February 29th, 2016 11:45pm
I think that anxiety can often involve negative predictions of the future. For example, present you may be a very capable presenter, but the prediction for future you is that the presentation will go horribly and everyone will laugh! Therefore, this disconnects future self from present self, since you think your future self will be radically worse off. You can't really be focused on being YOU when you are too busy worrying about how future you is messing up in your mind! There is also a lot of ruminating on the past with anxiety, like 'why did I get that persons name wrong, I am so stupid, I bet they think I am stupid and hate me now' But you are never actually experiencing the past or the future, you can only experience the present. People with anxiety just happen to spend a lot of time in the present getting really worried about the past or the future. So, to be better connected with your true self, you might consider practicing mindfulness. Learning to stay in the present can be an incredibly helpful tool for people with anxiety. Be fully aware of what you are experiencing and feeling NOW. You can't predict or live in the past or future, no matter what anxiety tells you.
June 5th, 2018 12:11am
You can only become closer to your future self by focusing on who are you are now and what you want.
January 19th, 2021 2:54pm
I learned a really cool exercise during a master class. You can start by closing your eyes and envisioning the future you that you'd like to be. The life you're living. The work you're doing. Once you fully envision this, take one physical step forward toward mindfully becoming that version of you. Then, open your eyes and see if you feel differently. More hopeful. Afterward, write down what you saw when you envisioned the future you. The idea is to connect with your true purpose or calling or dreams. Once you write down what you saw, write down 1-3 steps that you can take today toward becoming that person. Even if they're small steps.