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How do I know if I'm a bully?

155 Answers
Last Updated: 04/19/2020 at 3:46pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Lindsay Scheinerman, MA, LPC

Licensed Professional Counselor

My work with clients is to help them recognize and build on their strengths to find solutions for the conflicts presented in their lives.

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
October 28th, 2016 3:38pm
If you noticed that someone doesn't like you at all and he's afraid of being somewhere with you, maybe it's because your acting like a bully. Remeber everyone has their problems, do not be one of them. You are not cool if you are making fun of someone else, just remeber, they have emotions, thoughts and a heart just like you.
Anonymous
October 28th, 2016 6:30pm
One can be considered a bully when they point out people's weak points in a degrading manner, when they are enjoying a person's distress when they do so.
AnimeGeek02
November 10th, 2016 9:05pm
If you tease people over and over, you relay threatening messages, or you enjoy talking bad about ppl.
avamadueno22
November 16th, 2016 10:04pm
If you are hurting someone and are unaware about it, look back on how you speak to people, how you've been acting lately and try to see if that has reflected on anyone you know, Best way to address and fix the situation is to apologize and talk it through.
Anonymous
November 19th, 2016 12:10am
if you treat people the way you wouldn't want to be treated. You are being mean to them, hurting them. You are mistreating them
AutumnLeigh
January 19th, 2017 11:45pm
If you feel the only way to feel good about yourself is to mentally or physically hurt others, you may be a bully. Try to put yourselves in the shoes of people you may be hurting. How awful would it be if YOU were someone picked on for looking or acting 'different'. Trying to understand how others feel is a good start to learning to treat everyone equally.
wishfulHeart79
February 3rd, 2017 8:34pm
You are a bully when you call someone a name, or talk bad about them. You are a bully if you make someone cry, or hurt them in anyway.
Anonymous
February 8th, 2017 12:38pm
Bullying behaviour can include: verbal abuse, such as name calling and gossiping non-verbal abuse, such as hand signs or text messages emotional abuse, such as threatening, intimidating or humiliating someone ignoring or isolating someone criticising or spreading rumours physical assaults, such as hitting and pushing making silent, hoax or abusive calls online or cyberbullying
LexTheListener
February 8th, 2017 6:49pm
If the person whom you think you are bullying is bothered by the things you say or how you treat them physically, emotionally, etc., then you are almost definitely mistreating them. Talk to them and get to know this person better, and find out if you really are being a bully.
dizaztor
February 24th, 2017 1:49am
It can often be quite difficult to know whether you're bullying, purely because nobody likes to assign that sort of negative label to themselves. Think about what you are doing, if you are upsetting someone. Talk to him/her about it.
rainyAngeldani
March 10th, 2017 2:54pm
Talk to yourself. I know it sounds crazy but repeat what you are saying to others to yourself. If it sounds harsh and would hurt your own feelings and you know that you have been doing that regularly to yourself then that should help.
TommyGibson27
April 8th, 2017 7:03pm
A bully doesn't always know that they are one, it's how the victim pursues the situation. If they become hurt or negatively affected psychologically, physically or from social media, even if you don't mean any harm, it would still be classed as bullying. To avoid any misunderstanding, try and make sure that they know that what you have said is a joke or ask them why they feel the way they feel. :)
HeyImGwen
April 14th, 2017 8:33pm
Bullies tend to feed off of others' pain or negative emotions. If people fear to be around you, or tend to get quieter or scared when you come into a room, you may be a bully.
Anonymous
May 5th, 2017 9:43am
if you are putting others down and belittling them for their appearances, behaviour or personal likes then you are most defiantly bullying. Physical and mental belittlement, such as mocking, pushing and judging count as bullying
VanessaGraceStory
June 15th, 2017 11:10pm
a person who uses strength or power to harm or intimidate those who are weaker. someone who uses superior strength or influence to intimidate (someone), typically to force him or her to do what one wants.
Anonymous
June 17th, 2017 3:46am
Sit down in a quiet place and think to yourself if your actions towards others have hurt them.......
lilacskiedd
July 9th, 2017 10:12pm
you know if you're a bully if you see yourself making others feel worse about themselves for something they cannot help. if you find other people being nice to you, because they're scared of you, rather than treating you the way you're treating them.
Lucinda91
July 25th, 2017 5:30am
Is what you are saying/doing hurting someone? Are you repeatedly making someone sad? Are you repeatedly saying things that are hurtful/rude? Are you making someone uncomfortable? If yes to any of them, you are most likely being a bully
Anonymous
August 6th, 2017 9:38pm
If you constantly picking on a person and you notice they doesn't like action toward them well you're a bully
GivingstonTreegull
August 17th, 2017 8:09pm
Being a bully can be a whole lot like being opinionated. But you have to ask yourself is your opinion needed in particular circumstances in which you give them? Is what you are saying hurtful to someone? Are you intentionally hurting other people to seek attention? If so you might be a bully. Stop and ask yourself if you really think it is worth it. People who are bullied often suffer terribly and in silence. Bullying can even lead to suicide. So before you start to push someone around stop yourself and ask what would it feel like if it were happening to you? People do not deserve abuse!
Anonymous
September 14th, 2017 12:33am
You can see from your act, how do you treat others and interact with others. Some people who bullying are doing bad things to others, to hurt them, being sarcastic and make them down.
TheFriendInNeed
September 29th, 2017 10:41am
If you are hurting someone "intentionally" on their weaknesses or feelings through your actions or words either physically or mentally, then that is considered bullying. Usually bullies feel a sense of power over their victims. 1) Sometimes you may think that something as simple as name calling is just for fun, or you might be doing it due to peer pressure, but that fun might be costing someone else's feelings 2) You might be confused between teasing and bullying, normal teasing can be harmless whereas negative teasing can lead to bullying. Positive teasing is usually something that is more friendly and might lead to laughter. Negative teasing on the other hand has the intent to harm and uses a more aggressive tone 3) Sometimes you might be angry at your friend/classmate, and you may say something hurtful out of anger. That does not make you a bully. Anyway, the fact that you are asking this question already shows that you feel remorse and not intending to hurt anyone. Hope my answer helps
supportiveTouch77
October 28th, 2017 5:46pm
Usually Bullies have experienced Being the victim of bullying themselves. There is no true understanding as to why bullies do what they do. mostly it will be because it has happened to them or if they are going through difficult times and cannot find the correct way to express themselves.
commandercody209
November 9th, 2017 5:17pm
If you belittle people, or have the intent to hurt people. Your goal in a way would be to over power peoples emotions or physically or mentally hurt the person.
Anonymous
November 9th, 2017 5:26pm
You know you are a bully when you donĀ“t respect other peoples life choices and you find yourself enjoying (at any level) hummiliating people without consent. When you hurt people because it makes you feel better about yourself.
BubbleGumKissxoxo
November 11th, 2017 9:36pm
If you are calling somebody names and using words or physical contact to intentionally hurt them. You know if your goal is to upset that person.
zenGuy
November 12th, 2017 4:19am
If your actions make people unhappy and/or uncomfortable or if you use intimidation to get what you want.
alexwolfgirl87
November 16th, 2017 6:59am
Think if your actions or words are hurting those around you and if they are, you most likely are a bully,
Mityvac
November 16th, 2017 4:10pm
Self evaluate your actions. Imagine yourself in the other person's shoes. Are you hurt by the words you said? Or by the actions?
WatchingOverYou
November 16th, 2017 7:25pm
I think you can know very easily, Review in your head all the people you believe you might have bullied and, in the next time you are with them, see what's their first reaction when they see you. Pay special attention if they avoid making eye contact with you, try to go by unoticed or feel unconfortable and/or scared. If some of these aspects are presente then you are probably a bully. If none is but you're still unsure then I suggest simply talking openly to the people in stake about it,