How do I know if I'm a bully?

Everyone's experience in life is different, so the only way to know if you're a bully to someone else is to ask them. In asking them you can have a conversation about it, and if they feel like you have been a bully towards them for some reason, you can decide then how you want to respond to that. I have found in my past experience that talking to people about something is the best way to really understand how I have had an effect on that person and it is usually not as bad as I have thought. If you need advice on this I recommend reading the Bullying self-help guide on 7 cups or by starting a conversation with one of our trained listeners.

If you notice you enjoy hurting or making people afraid, it is likely you are behaving like a bully. Feelings of power and control may dominate your mind when you hurt unassertive individuals, this should indicate it is time to think about your thoughts and behavior. Bully's usually experience the feeling of being out of control in their own lives (home/school) or even experience abusive situations. If you are exhibiting aggressive or harmful behavior to weaker people, then it is likely you are trying to subconsciously re-gain that power. Self-esteem and assertiveness can be taught, so changing aggressive or harmful behaviors and replacing them with more healthy responses/thoughts is relatively easy when you understand why you originally behaved and thought that way. If you are unaware of what fear looks like in others, a good indicator would be facial expressions. Do people avoid you? Do people always just agree with you? are they confident to challenge you? Have you ever asked someone you know to be honest and tell you what people think of you and how you make them feel? Bullying doesn't always mean physically threatening or harming someone. It can be ostracizing weaker members of your group (Children/adults). Social media is a prime example of bullying without touching someone. Excluding friends from group social media platforms or posting mean pictures supposedly representing the person being bullied, are all gross acts of harmful psychological bullying. If any of this resonates it may be a good time to address these behaviors and seek support in implementing change.

If you persistently and systematically bad-mouth, intimidate, name-call, insult, exclude, make fun of, make life or tasks difficult or delayed on purpose, or mistreat a particular person or group, you are a bully. More so if you are in a position of power such that it is difficult, risky or even dangerous to the victim or victims to defend themselves from you. A bully has a target. The target may be randomly chosen. Usually, they will accuse the victim of being somehow defective. The bully may sincerely believe that the victim deserves that treatment. The bully may also feel intimidated by the victim, the successes or good traits that the victim may have, in such a way that the bully feels the need to defend itself from the victim. They may, thus, feel envy of the victim, but it is also often not the case. The bullies often (not always) have low self-esteem, care a lot about the opinion that others have about them, find pleasure in getting attention from the victim or others and in feeling that they have such power that they cannot be confronted. Abusing another person makes them feel in control, release anger that they feel against another person (whom they cannot confront) and thus feel better about themselves or their situation temporarily. If you suffer from malignant narcissism, chances are that you are a bully. Bullies have little to no empathy for their victims. They are seen just as objects for gratification or a threat to be rid of. Bullies don't seem to often believe that what they do is wrong anyhow. They don't tend to see themselves as bullies. If confronted about their conduct, bullies may blame the victim and play themselves as victims. The victim can almost never become "good enough" for the abuser to decide not to abuse.

It’s hard sometimes to practice self-awareness and reflection if you haven’t gotten in the habit of doing so. My question to you would be, what makes you ask this question in the first place? Do you have experience verbally or physically abusing someone else for the purpose of making them feel worse? Do you target one person and repeatedly try to take them down a notch? Taking the time to find within yourself the reasons you may do something like this will allow you to grow as a person and mend your ways. We all have space to learn to be better humans! I believe in you!

You find yourself unhappy with your life, you treat others unfairly on a regular basis when they don’t deserve your unfair treatment, you find whoever you pick on or are unfair to have or look as if they have better lifestyles and relationships that you may be lacking which is why you feel better after knocking them down as your jealous or have low self esteem yourself and feel you have no other ways of making yourself feel better about yourself. If you feel like this or are struggling daily with things and feel like you treat others badly regularly you may be a bully.

I think the fact that you are asking this question is an answer itself . I would suggest that if you feel that you have bullied someone maybe you should talk to that person, ask them if you have done something wrong for them , what is that thing and how can you fix it .from that you can only become a better person either you are or you're not.try not to be in denial of the answer that you will be recieving , face it whatever it is and dont be ashamed or scared and always remember a person who can make a conversation is a strong person .

Think about the things you consistently say and do to those around you and ask yourself how you would feel if someone said and did the same thing to you. Put yourself in another person's shoes and ask "did saying/doing this hurt that person? Did it cause physical/mental pain? Have I made their day worse instead of better?" If you can answer "yes" to these sorts of questions, and you do so intentionally and regularly, then maybe you are a bully. If you unintentionally hurt someone on several occasions I would say you are just unaware of how you are making someone else feel and rather than labelling yourself a bully you should try to change. If you think you're hurting someone, ask them, you would make yourself and that person very happy. Always think before you speak or act. Empathy is a very powerful thing, put yourself in someone else's shoes and treat someone the way you would like to be treated. Always be kind to others.

Put yourself in their shoes, would you feel harmed by your words? if you think you are hurting someone specifically then watch for their reactions as you say something you think is considered bullying. If their reaction seems sad and hurt then you should change your ways. If they genuinely laugh along with you then they must have a heavy sense of humor. You need to know that everyone takes words differently. A joke you said can tear someone apart and make someone else laugh. Remember, humor is subjective, not everyone is gonna get yours, some might think of it as bullying so you need to look out for your words.

Titled "Survival of the Fittest and the Sexiest," the study by researchers at Simon Fraser University in British Columbia, Canada, also found that bullies had the lowest levels of depression, the highest levels of self-esteem and the highest social status. There are a few key differences, though: Male bullies come in all shapes and sizes, from the popular football captain to the social outcast, while female bullies tend to be the popular girls (another factor that may help them escape punishment). What is Low Self-Esteem? Low self-esteem is when someone lacks confidence about who they are and what they can do. They often feel incompetent, unloved, or inadequate. People who struggle with low self-esteem are consistently afraid about making mistakes or letting other people down.

If you make fun of someone repeatedly, make them cry, make them feel horrible, then that could very well label you as a bully. There are other ways one could be labeled as a bully, but those are the most parts. Others may include, making others strongly dislike them, encouraging harmful behavior towards them, making fun of their body, their skin imperfections, or even making them feel lesser about themselves than they did before. There are a ton more but I want to keep this short so it doesn't inconvenience you. If you are just a person that tells the truth, don't be ashamed.

I think the best way to know if you're a bully is to reflect on how you treat others. The easiest way to be a bully without knowing it is to accidentally make a joke that hurts someone else's feelings. I once made a joke where I called my friend "not funny" because I thought it was such an outrageous thing to say and that I said it sarcastically enough for my friend to know I didn't mean it, but apparently my friend, the FUNNIEST person I know, is actually really insecure about whether or not their jokes are funny, and I had accidentally made them feel worse. Long story short, the best way to know is to ask your friends/check in with them about how your actions make them feel. I hope this helps!

If you are having second thoughts of the the things you are doing. We have differences from every aspect. It could be either in our beliefs, perceptions, physical attributes, race, gender preferences, likes and dislikes but there will never be enough reason to poke on someone’s weak spot. Let us live life happily and embrace diversity. Because of our differences it makes the world balance, we can learn from other people and so do they from us. Before doing something think not just twice but hundred of times, if you are making fun of someone, will it hurt them, or degrade them?

I feel like you need to understand the intentions of your actions and reflect on your behavior with others. I would not judge myself in a moralistic way, I would simply observe. If you feel like you are unable to figure out the answer yourself. Maybe ask people you trust around you. They may not give you the answer you want to hear. But, you should try to listen to them with an open mind and not argue. They may or may not be right. Multiple perspectives are also helpful. In the end, be kind to yourself. The fact you are asking this question shows you are trying to be a kind person.

Bully by definition is : a person who habitually seeks to harm or intimidate those whom they perceive as vulnerable. Bullying may take many forms, from physical assault, verbal abuse and social exclusion to cyber bullying. Generally, to be considered bullying, the practice must be carried out either by an individual or a group, repeatedly over time, and with an intent to hurt an individual person. Here are six signs I have found that is visible in a bully. Do take a look at yourself. 1. You repeatedly upset someone around you. 2. You have a lack of empathy. This is not always easy to recognize in oneself. You may want to ask people around you whether they think that is the case, or even take an empathy test. 3. You can get aggressive. This may include openly shouting, threatening or humiliating someone in front of others. But it could also be passive aggressive comments, such as "Oh, you are doing it that way, that's brave." 4. You thrive around insecure people. If you make yourself feel better by evoking discomfort or insecurity in a colleague, that would be a classic sign of bullying. This could be done, for example, by persistently picking on someone or deliberately setting them up to fail. 5. You spread malicious rumors about someone. It may not seem like a big deal, but spreading rumors could make someone's life a living hell – costing them professional and social success. 6. You misuse your power or position about performance issues. You may intentionally block someone's promotion or take away duties and responsibilities without any rationale or substance. Other possibilities include deliberately and persistently ignoring or excluding someone from joint collaborations and social events.

Bullying involves controlling, manipulating and gossiping about others. You might want to ask yourself why you have a curiosity with this question. Did someone personally label you as one? If so how did you feel about this? Reflect on your general perception of bullies and traits they may embody. Could it be you acted in a way that was regretful for you? Think are there people out there you feel you need to apologize to because you did something to deliberately hurt them? You are welcome to reach out to one of our listeners or online therapists on our site for further support. Thank you for your honesty. Wishing you all the best!

By definition, a bully is "a person who habitually seeks to harm or intimidate those whom they perceive as vulnerable". Indications of a bully are constantly projecting your negative feelings to hurt others, making yourself feel better from badgering other people's insecurities, and blaming others without taking responsibility. If you are suspecting that you are a bully, there is something that you feel that you did wrong to hurt someone. Try to reflect on that situation. Maybe you're in the wrong, maybe you're not. But, take a step back and analyze the situation and how you respond to it.

Some signs that someone is a bully are as follows: 1. You upset people around you frequently, whether that be with your words or actions. 2. You feel confident around those who are insecure, and you make sure those people know where they stand in your perception. 3. You show verbal or physical aggression. 4. You are unable to sympathize or empathize with others. 5. If you are prone to doing things like spreading rumors, misusing your authority over those who may be younger or more vulnerable, or finding pleasure in harming others who you percieve as inferior. These points are all taken from an article from Newsweek that discusses this question. However, the list I gave bluntly answers your question. This list doesn't take into account that many people have been at both sides of the spectrum. Having had some bad moments does not make you a bully, although you should acknowledge that these actions were wrong. The list doesn't take into account that people change. Empathy is something that can be practiced. Being mindful of other's feelings is something that can be developed. Knowing that all humans are worthy and are entitled to respect is something that can be ingrained over time so that it becomes the basis for your actions and interactions. This list doesn't take into account that sometimes harmful actions come from a place of insecurity, emotional pain, physical pain, and bad life experiences. These things cannot justify harmful actions, but they can explain them. Because they can be explained, there is room to understand and improve. In the end, it all boils down to whether you can ask for forgiveness from those you have hurt, forgive yourself, understand the root cause of your actions, and use the knowledge you have to strive to be a kinder human, to others, but also yourself :)

An obvious red flag that you are a bully would be that you lack empathy. you may not feel remorse or understand how your actions caused discomfort or agitated that person Although you may enjoy conversations or interactions with someone, if that person is constantly upset around you, or if they get angry with you frequently and complain about your attitude or behaviour, you may have some characteristics of a bully and should reflect on your past behaviours and actions to confirm if you are one. Behaviours such as gossiping vile rumours about that person and deliberately criticising that person's weaknesses are considered bullying.

Making loud noises, pointing bright lights at your eyes, and shoving stinky things in your face can be bullying if the person is doing it with the intent to cause you pain, or ignoring your requests to stop it. They don't have to hit you in order to hurt you. Causing sensory pain; this may be tailored to a disability such as flashing lights at a photosensitive person or making loud noise in order to watch an autistic person jump and whimper Trying to irritate an injury, such as prodding a broken arm, or dropping things for you to pick up when you have a painful knee injury Trying to trigger a medical condition, such as using flash photography to try to trigger a seizure in an epileptic person, or showing graphic content to someone who has PTSD or a phobia.

A bully a person who habitually seeks to harm or intimidate those whom they perceive as vulnerable. If that feels like you then yes maybe. If you mock someone and know that it hurts them or upsets them, yet you keep doing so then yes. Do you make others feel intimidated and scared? Has someone stopped doing something they love or going somewhere they like because of you? if the answer is yes you have the power to stop and change. you can apologise and fix the issues with the person as well as ask how to make things right. it takes a lot of courage and listening skills to do so

if you are continuously teasing someone for no reason or physically hurting someone for no reason over and over every day. that is considered bullying. if you don’t want to be a bully be nice to others and follow the golden rule.

Sometimes it can be hard for us to assess whether we are bullies. However, there are questions we can ask to take inventory of our behavior and hold ourselves accountable if we feel we might be acting in a bullying way. First, consider asking yourself whether you ever make jokes at the expense of other people. Look at where you derive pleasure, humor, and entertainment from. Is it ever from putting people down or mocking them? Do you ever make fun of people or tease them? Even if you are only joking, the people you are joking about might not feel the same about those jokes. Have they expressed any distress about the jokes? Have you asked them how they feel and have they been less enthusiastic about the jokes than you are? Do you criticize people often? Do you find fault with others? Do you pressure people into acting or behaving in a certain way? Do you pressure people into doing things they aren't comfortable with? If you answered "yes" to any of those questions, it's possible you are engaging in some bullying behaviors. The good news is, once you are aware of it, you can work on changing it, should you choose.

Someone would know if they were guilty of being a bully by taking the time to reflect on their behaviors and interactions with others. If they found that they engage in or have developed an aggressive self-serving skill set in any of the following: emotional manipulation, isolation and, or gossip, then they might take their actions into consideration. Hopefully they would come to the realization that these behaviors are typical of what is commonly considered a bully. Hopefully they would then take the necessary action to avoid engaging in such behavior in the future. A little empathy goes a long way.

It's best to examine the people around you. What do they think of you? Often times, I ask myself why people are being so distant from me, why they're talking bad about me, why no one really takes the initiative to start conversations with me. In that case, you've probably hurt someone, at least in my experience. You can learn a lot of things about yourself by assessing those around you. I victimize myself for this, when really I am the issue, I am the one that is bullying others and painting this bad image of myself. I feel like once you recognize that, then you will know the answer to this question.

If you are someone who uses power, or money, or any other advantage you might have over others to sabotage them, hurt them, or to control them, you are a bully. Even if you are someone who is fortunate, but chooses to keep it all to yourself, you may not be a bully in the literal sense of the meaning, but you are nothing short of one. To be a nice and kind person, you need to understand the importance of sharing with those less fortunate with you. A quote that I like to love my life by is, "If you are more fortunate than others, build a longer table, not a taller fence."

You probably are not since you are asking yourself that question. Bullies often don't care about their behaviour and they don't ask if they actions have negative (or any) reactions on someone's life. They are manipulators, control freaks and two-faced people. They always pick on the weakest link in their or some other group of people. They lack empathy and can get agressive quite easily. They spread malicious rumors and are attention seekers. But, deep inside they are unhappy and lonely people with some sort of past trauma that made them that way. If you still think you are a bully, ask yourself what made you that way since you were not born with it.

A bully can come in many ways. Any time you are causing affect negativity to another person. Picking on others just for the fun of it. Finding joy in others suffering. Imposing your opinions, thoughts, feelings onto someone who is not invested or does not want it. Not respecting boundaries of others. Talking negatively about others. Passing judgment by appearance, behaviors, actions to others. Being a bully can look different from one person to another. If you do not know limits of respecting others, you could be considered a bully.

This world is full of people of all kinds. Among the people who you have interacted frequently, you may find that some are never getting tired of putting you down and causing you feeling a strong sense of self-guilt and insecurity. Please flag them. Beforehand try collecting as many evidences as possible to verify the suspicion. Well-rounded people don't bully others and cause discomfort. Bullies are normally living with underlining psychological issues. It is not fair to simply label as "bad people". It is also not practical to expect everyone to be friendly and kind when they are not feeling okay in their heads. If you see someone enjoy making you suffer mentally and physically for fun. You can be sure that you have spotted your bully...Ignore. Respond to facts not their emotions if you have to. Step outside the room. Move on to focus on your own business.

Got an adgenda, usually to make everything about the self at another persons expense. Sometimes doesn’t have to be an adgenda sometimes a person gets triggered with their own issues and rather than deal with them inadvertently take them out on someone else. Some people just feel better about themselves if the other person looks weaker and this is the usual definition of a bully, and probably the worst one, especially if it’s in public. A bully pushes others around to make space for their own fragile ego, rather than facing their own fears puts them on others, a bully is a coward

If you seem to be hurting others feelings you could be a bully. If you are messing around with other people in a fun way and they take it the wrong way it could be considered bullying. Looking for social cues when talking to people you have teased in the past is a great way to tell if the person you tease thinks that their bullying you. These social cues could be, awkwardness, shyness, and being uncomfortable when talking to you. If you have 4 any of these social cues pop up when talking to the person you may want to rethink of how you talk to them and or tease them and make sure it is in a friendly manner.