Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav

Is it my fault I am being bullied?

49 Answers
Last Updated: 06/08/2021 at 9:21pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Elena Morales, LMHC

Licensed Professional Counselor

I believe silence creates a cycle. With empathic and collaborative therapy, we break the cycle. I help clients feel validated and supported passed anger, shame, and anxiety.

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
December 21st, 2014 6:23am
It's never ever your fault when you are being bullied, no matter what it's not your fault and you can't do anything to stop it from starting but you can do things to make it stop. Usually the reason why people are bullies is because something bad is happening at home and they want to take it out on someone else but it is never your fault.
HeyItsTee
December 11th, 2014 3:46pm
No it's not. However, it would be your fault if you don't take a stand, and let bullying affect your life and affect how you see yourself in the mirror, what you can do is take that as a challenge/motive and prove to them that you're better and YOU CAN DO BETTER AND YOU DON'T CARE WHAT THEY SAY!
Anonymous
December 10th, 2014 9:42pm
It is not your fault that you are bullied. You did not *make* someone else bully you. You cannot control someone else's actions. You only control your own actions. So, what is up to you is making your reaction to this bully one you are proud of. For some help deciding what to do, you can read the bullying support guide above. Best wishes!
vickyizzy
December 14th, 2014 12:33pm
it's never your fault to be bullied. Most of the times people who bully others are just sad and trying to vent out their feelins in some way. None of that is your fault.
AnnieElen
December 10th, 2014 11:29pm
Being bullied is never your fault. You shouldn't be put down by them or even thinking it's your fault.
Helper6754
December 16th, 2014 11:12pm
no its never your fault the bullies do it to feel better about themselves because at some point they have been bullied too most likely
genuineSeal64
April 8th, 2015 10:27am
Definitely 100% not your fault, people who have problems with themselves tend to be bullies and whatever hardships there going through they will find a person to pick fault about e.g I have small lips and I got bullied for something as silly as that because bullies have nothing better to do.... Stay strong, it'll stop :)
Anonymous
May 8th, 2015 3:16pm
It's difficult to remember this, and sometimes I don't even believe it myself, but it is not my fault. It is not my fault that my classmates had to put me down to make them feel better about themselves. It is not my fault that they peered over the toilet cubicle to see me self harming and made fun of me. It is not my fault.
Bella20
March 22nd, 2016 2:07pm
It is NEVER your fault that you are being bullied. Bullies often pick on those they think are weaker than themselves. Sometimes they do it because they are jealous but most of the time it is to justify themselves and make themselves feel better. But it is never EVER your fault.
FeriWitch
November 18th, 2019 4:13am
It's never the victim's fault for being bullied. It's never a choice they make. Bullying is entirely the fault of the bully - the person who decides to go out of their way to hurt someone else, because they think they can get away with it. The bully may come up with excuses like "they were asking for it" or "I had to hit them or they wouldn't stop doing that thing that bothered me" - but they're wrong; there are always other ways to communicate. Bullies put a lot of effort into claiming their actions were justified, and in claiming their victims earned or deserved to be hurt. It's all lies. Nobody deserves cruelty.
girlwholovestheworld
April 6th, 2015 5:17pm
No, it's not your fault. Other are making an conscious choice to hurt you.
SandraBrown
January 30th, 2018 2:33pm
It is not your fault. These people are just not happy with themselfs, and they attack others. Every attack is calling for help. It's nothing about you. It is about them.
BennyBunny
June 14th, 2015 6:28pm
No. It is NEVER your fault if you are being bullied. It does not matter what you might have done or what you might have said to someone, it is not an excuse to bully you. Often it does not even have anything to do with you personally. Sometimes the person that bullies you has problems of their own or feel insecure and respond in the only way they know how to deal with those kinds of emotions - they let it out on others. So, no. It is not your fault that you are being bullied. You are okay and you're perfectly fine the way you are.
JustMe11
June 25th, 2015 4:12pm
Absolutely not! I'm so sorry to hear when anyone in being bullied, but it shows a lot more about the characteristics of the bully than the person being bullied. As always, I encourage anyone facing the trouble of being bullied to reach out for help because you don't deserve that and someone is out there to help you.
Anonymous
December 11th, 2014 2:11am
No! Being bullied is NEVER the victim's fault. Bullying is the bully's fault, always. You're not in control of someone else's actions, only your own.
cherishedJet13
April 18th, 2017 11:17am
No it is never your fault for being bullied. You are the victim and you should never be blamed because you didn't ask to be bullied, people are just insecure and jealous which is why bullies tend to bully others. But never ever think it is your fault.
LoveAndPeaceOnThePlanetEarth
October 17th, 2016 3:32am
It's never your fault if you're being bullied, even if you're being told that. It's always the bullier, or the bulliers parents or someone else who's causing the bullying to happen's fault
Anonymous
October 10th, 2016 2:45pm
No it isn't. It's not your fault. Bullies bully people because they themselves have been bullied and they want others to feel how they've felt or they're too insecure of something you're self concious about or they're jealous of something you have or something you are and they're not and they don't have it. Bullies usually pick random people to pick on, so do not blame yourself for getting bullied
Anonymous
July 2nd, 2020 9:53pm
No it is not your fault. Bullies like to make people,feel like it is your fault,but it is there fault. So please do not feel like it is your fault. If you have been bullied, and need support please reach out to a listener here at 7cups. They can offer support and suggestions on how not,to feel that way. If you are being bullied by someone it is ok to tell someone, you trust, like a friend or a teacher or your Pastor. I am disabled and I have been bullied. It was not a fun thing to go through. It made me stronger and wiser. It is never your fault your the victim.
HopieRemi
July 12th, 2016 6:27am
No. It is not your fault that you are bullied. No one deserves to be mistreated in any form or fashion. Normally the person who bullies you has an unhappy life and they take joy out of hurting you in the way that they do. Usually a bully isn't getting attention at home and so when they bully you, then enjoy the fact that you give them the attention they want. But it is not your fault.
brightOcean69
April 25th, 2016 8:31pm
it is never your fault you are been bullied as most bullies have their own stuff and can't deal with it so they bully others
StayStrongNeverLoseHope
March 28th, 2016 9:10pm
No, it's never your fault if others decide to bully you. The only reason why people pick on others is because they think it looks cool and it makes them feel better, probably because they've had someone pick on them too in the past. But it's not cool and it's not fair on the person getting bullied and you don't deserve any of it, and I really do hope you manage to report it and get it dealt with so that it stops!
Anonymous
December 28th, 2015 5:32pm
Absolutely, completely, totally not, because bullies have darker pasts and struggle a lot, so they hurt people to make them feel better so it is obvious that it is not your fault
BatWings89
December 14th, 2015 7:38pm
Being bullied is never the victims fault. Never! People are bullying you and that is not okay. Check out the guides here and never ever base your self worth on the bad things other people say.
Anonymous
November 16th, 2015 5:15pm
No, it is definitely not your fault you are being bullied. Bullies simply have their own personal insecurities and so to boost their self esteem they seem to think it is okay to point out other peoples insecurities or flaws. but no one is perfect and so you should ignore them because if you are happy with yourself, then that's the only thing that matters
Infpbutalive
December 12th, 2014 5:14pm
NO!!!! It is not your fault. Never believe that.
PansLostGirl
December 29th, 2014 1:23am
It is never your fault! More than likely the bully is going through something at home and will take it out on someone else.
Anonymous
July 14th, 2015 12:53am
It is never anyone's fault that they're being bullied. No one deserves to be treated unkindly or meanly.
Anonymous
July 7th, 2015 2:55pm
No its never the victims fault. you didn't do anything wrong you can never blaime yourself i understand that its frustrating but its never the victims fault.
Guidancefortheunguided
April 8th, 2015 12:59am
The person who is standing for the good... can never be at fault! Stay strong my friend because that bully cant take your spirit... your spirit is unbreakable !