Is it my fault I am being bullied?

46 Answers
Last Updated: 08/14/2018 at 10:48pm
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United States
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Kristin Noyes, MSW, LCSW

Clinical Social Work/Therapist

Depression and anxiety can feel overwhelming even on the best of days. I believe in helping clients understand these disorders and help them to reduce and manage symptoms.

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
December 21st, 2014 6:23am
It's never ever your fault when you are being bullied, no matter what it's not your fault and you can't do anything to stop it from starting but you can do things to make it stop. Usually the reason why people are bullies is because something bad is happening at home and they want to take it out on someone else but it is never your fault.
HeyItsTee
December 11th, 2014 3:46pm
No it's not. However, it would be your fault if you don't take a stand, and let bullying affect your life and affect how you see yourself in the mirror, what you can do is take that as a challenge/motive and prove to them that you're better and YOU CAN DO BETTER AND YOU DON'T CARE WHAT THEY SAY!
vickyizzy
December 14th, 2014 12:33pm
it's never your fault to be bullied. Most of the times people who bully others are just sad and trying to vent out their feelins in some way. None of that is your fault.
Anonymous
December 10th, 2014 9:42pm
It is not your fault that you are bullied. You did not *make* someone else bully you. You cannot control someone else's actions. You only control your own actions. So, what is up to you is making your reaction to this bully one you are proud of. For some help deciding what to do, you can read the bullying support guide above. Best wishes!
Helper6754
December 16th, 2014 11:12pm
no its never your fault the bullies do it to feel better about themselves because at some point they have been bullied too most likely
AnnieElen
December 10th, 2014 11:29pm
Being bullied is never your fault. You shouldn't be put down by them or even thinking it's your fault.
genuineSeal64
April 8th, 2015 10:27am
Definitely 100% not your fault, people who have problems with themselves tend to be bullies and whatever hardships there going through they will find a person to pick fault about e.g I have small lips and I got bullied for something as silly as that because bullies have nothing better to do.... Stay strong, it'll stop :)
Anonymous
December 11th, 2014 2:11am
No! Being bullied is NEVER the victim's fault. Bullying is the bully's fault, always. You're not in control of someone else's actions, only your own.
Infpbutalive
December 12th, 2014 5:14pm
NO!!!! It is not your fault. Never believe that.
PansLostGirl
December 29th, 2014 1:23am
It is never your fault! More than likely the bully is going through something at home and will take it out on someone else.
Anonymous
May 8th, 2015 3:16pm
It's difficult to remember this, and sometimes I don't even believe it myself, but it is not my fault. It is not my fault that my classmates had to put me down to make them feel better about themselves. It is not my fault that they peered over the toilet cubicle to see me self harming and made fun of me. It is not my fault.
Bella20
March 22nd, 2016 2:07pm
It is NEVER your fault that you are being bullied. Bullies often pick on those they think are weaker than themselves. Sometimes they do it because they are jealous but most of the time it is to justify themselves and make themselves feel better. But it is never EVER your fault.
SandraBrown
January 30th, 2018 2:33pm
It is not your fault. These people are just not happy with themselfs, and they attack others. Every attack is calling for help. It's nothing about you. It is about them.
girlwholovestheworld
April 6th, 2015 5:17pm
No, it's not your fault. Other are making an conscious choice to hurt you.
Guidancefortheunguided
April 8th, 2015 12:59am
The person who is standing for the good... can never be at fault! Stay strong my friend because that bully cant take your spirit... your spirit is unbreakable !
Anonymous
April 9th, 2015 2:23pm
It is never your fault to be bullied, no matter what has happen or what you look like or dress like you are you for a reason don't change that because of others.
Anonymous
April 11th, 2015 3:58am
It's always quite common that -- all victims seem like they are the reason that they feel bullied. It is not your fault trust me. Just do not turn into the bullier okay.
beautifulSoul02
April 16th, 2015 3:38pm
It is never your fault for getting bullied. Normally the bully has something going on in their life which causes them to want to upset other people
Anonymous
June 7th, 2015 10:32am
It's never your fault that you're being bullied! It's normally because of the fact that some people have been emotionally injured along the path of development and feel it necessary to bring others down in order to feel higher and better.
BennyBunny
June 14th, 2015 6:28pm
No. It is NEVER your fault if you are being bullied. It does not matter what you might have done or what you might have said to someone, it is not an excuse to bully you. Often it does not even have anything to do with you personally. Sometimes the person that bullies you has problems of their own or feel insecure and respond in the only way they know how to deal with those kinds of emotions - they let it out on others. So, no. It is not your fault that you are being bullied. You are okay and you're perfectly fine the way you are.
jordanthetrekkie
June 22nd, 2015 9:39pm
No it is never your fault. You are not the antagonist. Usually bullies have experienced failure, been bullied before, or have been inadequate in some way. They take it out on people they view as weaker.
JustMe11
June 25th, 2015 4:12pm
Absolutely not! I'm so sorry to hear when anyone in being bullied, but it shows a lot more about the characteristics of the bully than the person being bullied. As always, I encourage anyone facing the trouble of being bullied to reach out for help because you don't deserve that and someone is out there to help you.
Anonymous
July 7th, 2015 2:55pm
No its never the victims fault. you didn't do anything wrong you can never blaime yourself i understand that its frustrating but its never the victims fault.
Anonymous
July 14th, 2015 12:53am
It is never anyone's fault that they're being bullied. No one deserves to be treated unkindly or meanly.
Specialrain
August 10th, 2015 6:33pm
No, it is never the victims fault that they are bullied, quite often the bully will be experiencing horrible things in their life and they feel that it needs to be taken out on someone or something.
WesternCanada1
September 15th, 2015 11:06pm
It is absolutly not your fault that your are bullied. Not at all ! Th problem is when you feel you are the victim and get what we call " secondary gaining" from being a victim . This is what you have to change: your inner attitude towards whatever happens to you.
Anonymous
November 16th, 2015 5:15pm
No, it is definitely not your fault you are being bullied. Bullies simply have their own personal insecurities and so to boost their self esteem they seem to think it is okay to point out other peoples insecurities or flaws. but no one is perfect and so you should ignore them because if you are happy with yourself, then that's the only thing that matters
BatWings89
December 14th, 2015 7:38pm
Being bullied is never the victims fault. Never! People are bullying you and that is not okay. Check out the guides here and never ever base your self worth on the bad things other people say.
Anonymous
December 28th, 2015 5:32pm
Absolutely, completely, totally not, because bullies have darker pasts and struggle a lot, so they hurt people to make them feel better so it is obvious that it is not your fault
CaringBrit
February 8th, 2016 3:40am
no it is not your fault your being bullied at all you havent done any wrong in any way or caused it to happen