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How to forgive yourself for past mistakes?

109 Answers
Last Updated: 05/03/2021 at 1:25pm
How to forgive yourself for past mistakes?
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Kelly Brast, MA, LPC-S, LSOTP, CART

Licensed Professional Counselor

Life can be overwhelming sometimes. I specialize in helping people organize their thoughts, getting rid of the things holding them back, and finding a path to a better future.

Top Rated Answers
RisingWaves333
March 30th, 2016 9:04am
By accepting the fact that you can't go back and change it.We all make mistakes.Every one of us.All that matters is if you learned from it or not.Don't let it define who you are.Let go.Maybe you were supposed to do it.You are no longer the same person who committed it if it changed you. You may not get it now.But one day when you look back,you will see that it changed the way you look at life,at everything in some way.Let it make you a stronger, better person
Anonymous
March 30th, 2016 12:19am
Accept that you've made these mistakes, know that there's nothing you can do to change them. Stop holding onto that one memory, or whatever came out of that mistake no matter how bad it was, because it won't do anyone any good. Let go of that guilt and build your life and always remember that you'll never do something like that again if you can help it. That you're not a bad person, that you feel bad because you don't want to be that person, and that things can always get better.
Freebirdie
April 28th, 2016 8:49pm
Accept them. Those mistakes were made in past and there's nothing that can be done about them now. You are not the mistakes you made. Don't let your mistakes define you. You are much more than what you did and the fact that you want to forgive yourself is the biggest proof that you are much more then them. Your greatest opportunity is the present so make the most of it!
luminousRainbows90
April 14th, 2016 4:33am
You are trying to forgive yourself for your past mistakes that means you are feeling guilty for your past and this the best thing to realize that you have done something wrong. Now the thing is you can't go back in the past to do the right thing, you have to let go of your past because you are ashamed for what you have done and that is enough. Forget your past and try to not do the same mistake in the present and future. Be happy :)
Anonymous - Expert in Depression
March 29th, 2016 5:40am
Understand it is the past - you can't change the past but you can improve your future. Use the past as a learning experience and keep looking forward. Understand that everyone makes mistakes and you can't ever be perfect.
Spirited1
May 25th, 2016 9:22am
The only true moment is the present one. So many of us get stuck in pattern of thinking about the past - but it is gone and it is irretrievable. The best gift you can give yourself is to pay attention to your current possibilities and life that is happening right now. Mindfulness practice can help with this. If a regret from the past is lingering, perhaps there is something about what happened that you are supposed to learn from before you can move on? Try to find the lesson, and to process any unresolved emotions, so that you can be free, A therapist or trusted friend might help you with this. Get into the habit of practising some self compassion. Whatever you did then, however you behaved, you did so because you felt it was the right choice at the time. Accept this. Life is a process of learning and evolving - so don't be so hard on yourself if you didn't handle something perfectly. Be thankful for the opportunity to learn and try again - experience is a great teacher. So play it forward and make an intention to do something differently next time. Good luck :)
couragetogo
March 27th, 2016 3:44pm
You can't change the past. Don't let it define your future. Mistakes don't always have to be mistakes. They are just decisions we made with an impact that whe haven't fully understood until we realize where we stand in our lives.
charmingGrace72
April 1st, 2016 4:05pm
Alright, this is one I have tons of experience with. I've made a lot of mistakes. But, so has everyone else on this earth. The past is the past. You can't change it, no matter how hard you try... or how hard you want to. All you can do is move forward and learn from those mistakes. It's really hard to do. I'm not going to say it's easy. But, it's worth it in the end.
UsmanAbbasi
May 9th, 2016 4:50pm
sometime we done things without thinking or without finding there results or we done things with knowing their results but we are humanbeings, time makes us realize that what had done by us was wrong it doest mean that we bend our past with our future it means, that was our past and we leaned from it,.
Shibbhie143
June 3rd, 2016 1:54pm
I have stumbled upon this quote on the Internet, "Sometimes good people make bad choices. It doesn't mean they're bad. It only means they're human." We all make mistakes. You most likely had a valid reason for doing something regretful at that time, no matter how irrational it might be. When you forgive yourself, you are accepting that your actions have lead to certain consequences. It is through acceptance the wounds of your past mistakes would be healed. It's a step towards greater growth. Always remember you are worthy more than you think you are.
BlackSwan99
April 24th, 2016 3:02pm
You have to be fully aware that you have no control over the past and that it cannot be changed, this might be saddening but if you really thought it through you will find that it isn't. How? Well, I bet you learnt a lot from your mistakes, and that something inside you have changed and your thoughts and mind got more broadened, that you started to see a lot of thing differently and understand more things and the people around you. and I'm sure mistakes taught you to have self discipline and put some thought to what you say and do and make you a better person for yourself and the people around you. Mistakes could bring you down and destroy your entire life and make you lose the people around you, However, you always have the potential to turn that to your side and fix everything, you just need to be strong and have patience to achieve that. I hope you do well and be able to deal with what you did to forgive yourself, and please know that mistakes doesn't define us, it's the way we try to fix them. :)
Arna
April 29th, 2016 10:38pm
You need to realise that you are not the same person today as you were in the past. You are only human and us humans, we make mistakes. It does no good to dwell in the past, since what's done is done. Promise yourself not to make the same mistake again.
wontonlover18
January 15th, 2018 5:13pm
Learn all your mistakes. Forgive and forget. Of course, sometimes those thoughts will pass by, but we can't help it, can we? Just move on, and life will be better.
bluebubbles26
March 29th, 2016 6:34pm
Everyone makes mistakes and everyone has regrets, so we're all in the same boat. Dont stress over it or think about it too much, just concentrate on making your future happy
Anonymous
March 31st, 2016 9:47pm
Don't hold onto shame, or guilt, focus on what you learnt from that mistake, forgive yourself, and let go of any negative emotion towards yourself. We all make mistakes, you deserve forgiveness.
SnowInOctober
May 3rd, 2016 6:25am
Take out a piece of paper, and write down what you regret doing in the past. Then, write down reasons why you should forgive yourself. You can then fold the paper, and keep it in a diary, or somewhere close to you. Whenever you think of your past mistakes and feel the overwhelming sense of guilt, take out the paper and read it. Hope this helps. :)
YemekYiyenSincap
April 10th, 2016 4:48pm
You can't change past but you can change your future. Don't stuck in your past mistakes. Also you experienced your past mistakes. This meaning : You can't any mistakes like past :D
MoonChild17
May 27th, 2016 2:55pm
By keep on thinking that those mistakes will never make you a bad person , those mistakes made the who you are now , you don't have to hide it or feel ashamed of it , NEVER FEEL ASHAMED OF YOUR OWN MISTAKES , because we are human and we all sin , and mistakes makes us better version of us , it makes us realize the very deep in life , you should trust yourself that you are a good person and you are doing your best and keep in mind , Every saint was a sinner and every sinner has a future , love yourself and don't be so cruel on it because it deserves the best
ShadowAngel15
April 8th, 2016 8:06pm
Learn to accept that you made mistakes, but also realize nobody is perfect and that you can always try again as long as you do your best to repent.
Anonymous
April 15th, 2016 3:33am
You can do that by actually putting your best foot forward for your future. Do the BEST you can and give it your all :)
TherapeuticHope
June 24th, 2016 5:28am
Forgiving yourself can be one of the most challenging things to do in your life; that's because you know more now than you did before. Mistakes teach us things, and so we gain knowledge. The secret to forgiving yourself is to know that you know more now than you ever would have before if you hadn't made that mistake; instead of regretting it, move on from it, and learn from it.
Anonymous
November 14th, 2017 8:07pm
Sometimes it can be really hard especially if you think that you have done something really bad. However if you have made things better now why is there reason to hat yourself? We all have our past ghosts that haunt us but we can forgive ourselves, just by letting go and moving on. Don't live upon it otherwise it will haunt you for a very long time.
kingdom20
May 25th, 2016 7:13am
move on and be convinced that you are no longer that person by doing better things in life and also by avoiding repeating those mistakes! that way you will forgive yourself and know that you are not capable of making those mistakes again because we all learn from our mistakes!
Anonymous
March 27th, 2016 3:44am
By learning from our past mistakes. Failures are the pillars of our success. To err is human, to forgive is divine. We all are human beings, are we all can have mistakes, but the key piece is to keep our head held high and learning from them.
Anonymous
April 2nd, 2016 3:02pm
you can`t change the past. you have to accept what you did. But you can decide how you want to life your future live.
Anonymous
May 13th, 2016 3:16pm
You can't change what's already happened. Your mistakes can either make you or break you it's your choice to decide which.
Anonymous
June 1st, 2016 7:54pm
You should try and write down all the things you learned after that mistake. There's always a good side for a problem you've faced.
Anonymous
June 3rd, 2016 4:25am
When I have made mistakes in my past I generally try to remember that they are behind me. I think you can either learn from your past or let it continue to hurt you. So, I try to learn from it and within that discovery process I am able to find forgiveness for myself.
yasminmarie
May 14th, 2016 12:47am
We all have made mistakes in the past, we make mistakes now and I'm sure we will make lots of mistakes in future. You should realise that without these mistakes you wouldn't the person you are today. You have learned from those mistakes and it's a good thing. If you don't make mistakes that just basically means that you never try anything new and I don't think that that's a good thing in life. So know that those mistakes have shaped you into the person you are right now and don't worry about them, the mistakes, you're gonna make LOTS of mistake and not just you, everyone. But that's okay, we hurt people and people hurt us. We learn and we teach. It's called life.
lipsticklez
April 3rd, 2016 12:09am
Everyday is a new day start it with a smile do some yoga and eat breakfast this gives you a healthier and more clearer mind to think and helps your emotions happier