Why am I not good enough for my parents?

I wasn't the favorite child! I tried to be so hard, I changed and imitated the favorite child but it was never enough. I gave up trying to be and then suddenly I became good enough. I was curious as to what changed, was it because I stopped trying? Or because I focused on my self not minding that I wasn't good enough? I honestly can't say. But it didn't hurt no more the moment I decided I was good enough for myself. I'm glad I choose me! Maybe then they saw me cause I wasn't trying so hard again.

I hear you saying that you think you are not good enough for your parents. Is there a specific thing that they have said or done that leads you to believe this? I know it can be difficult as i felt similarly in relation to my parents. How does their behavior make you feel? Is there something that you can think of that would clarify your situation or even change the way you feel about it? I ask because you may have the answer that will work best for you inside of yourself. Would you like to talk more about this?

you are! it might not seem that way but they truly do love and care for you. I feel the same way about mine and I have struggled with many issues bc of that but they will always care about you. I got through this my constantly telling myself that they love me and are proud of me. I think this has helped but maybe think of ways to get that idea out of your head! My parents are not the beat at showing affection so that has caused me to feel unloved which also affected relationships with friends. Try to get the negative thoughts out of your head and fill them with positive things that your parents have done for you! this was really helpful for me and i hope you get through this!

It may very much seem that you are not good enough for your parents, but this is simply just the wrong perspective. What is really happening is that your parents have set a specific "bar" for you to reach and you are not reaching that bar. Your parents are expecting much more from you than you are able to give and it is decreasing their opinion of you. However, this is not a reflection of how good you are. Your parents expectations do not measure your worth; your achievements and accomplishments are the true measure of your worth, and your worth is best decided by you.

Speaking from personal experience, this is a question I have asked my self alot in the past. If your parents have high standards to which you cannot reach, that is OK. You are not perfect and neither are you a robot made by them to be what they want. You are a human that was made by them. A human with his/her's own qualities and skills. Do not pressurize your self to reach their standards. Its bad for mental health and if you don't feel likenits for you then don't do it because you'll slowly lose yourself in the process. Criticism is awful, especially when its from people like your parents because they are the ones you expect to support and help you in times of need. Don't let their words get to you. Be your self. Follow your dreams. In the long run who's the one to benefit? Its you. I'm not telling you to rebel but never think that you are not enough.

You are good enough. I know parents might say things which make you feel like they find you not enough but it's not true, they want you to be the best version of yourself, they want to see you a successful and brilliant person but deep inside they love you as you are, with your strengths and weaknesses. They love you, and they want the best for you. You need to believe in yourself, believe that you are good and enough but this means that you have to work consistently on yourself. It's the only way to grow in a world that doesn't stop growing.

Hello . I'm sorry that you think like this, but let me tell you something , we decide how to be and nobody ,even our parents can't put a limit of our best. Sure they are your parents ,they love you more than anything but sometimes they make mistakes ,like now . You are good enough for all ,if you don't like something at your self change it ,but make this cause you want not others . Be your self ,cause if you lose your self things become senseless . It's about you not about others. Trust your self more . Take care for your self🙂.

Often times parents see their children as an extension of themselves. They see their children as who they want to be, or who they wished they could be when they were young. This is not fair. I hope for you that you are able to give yourself the permission to be your own person, your most authentic self, and your highest self. Be the person that you like, want to be, and enjoy being. If your parents don't like you when you like you, then this is not your fault, and you don't need to try to control how they feel.

A parent's 'job' is to nurture, encourage, and support a child's growth in a positive direction. Often parents might express 'standards' in order for the child to reach higher level of achievement, to improve them/ prepare them for independence, or to give their child what they see as a sense of personal satisfaction or personal accomplishment. But these 'standards' can often be a source of negative pressure, to cause anxiety, feelings of incompetency, deficiency, and disappointment in oneself. It's important to know, that you are striving to be your best self. You might feel like, or your parents might make you feel like you aren't enough, but you have your own set of goals. You are you, not your parents, and you are on a winding journey to become the best version of you, whether you are fortunate to have your parents help you on that journey, or you are finding trusting friends along the way :)

This question resonated with my soul. As an individual who has experienced these thoughts I know how suffocating it can be and how much it hurts. You are not alone in your thoughts as many of us have felt this way. From my experience, it helped when I explored my thoughts, acknowledged the emotions that I was denying myself and what I wanted. Some times we hide our true feelings and emotions behind this question, where we pin the blame on ourselves and we forget that we were just young and innocent. This isn't a question that a child (whether you're 3, 13 or 30, age doesn't matter) should be questioning. You are good enough, you are worthy of love and affection. You are valid and it is not okay for anyone to make you feel otherwise even if they are family. Sorting out our feelings that are shielded behind this question is a scary thought but we can do this. It truly helps in the long run

It depends on how they view you or treat you as their child. Sometimes because of the experiences they had it influences how they grow their children. Whether it may be negative or positive. They sometimes have a hard accepting who you are or seeing who you've become therefore you may not get that recognition you deserve. It can be challenging dealing with situations especially without support and when you need it the most. I am here to tell you that whenever you think you are not good enough help them see the person you are cause they may not be using the right view. Just know that you are good enough and you are who you are, accept yourself.

For my immigrant parents, the goal was for me me to be the most successful I could be. But sometimes parents pin a lot of their own hopes and dreams on you and you can't be expected to fulfill every single one. Parents are humans too and at times they fail to realize that you are your own person. I think what is takes is realizing that you are good enough regardless of other people's perception of you. Everyone has intrinsic value regardless of their success. It can be hard to swallow since we're brought up thinking that the more successful you are, the better of a person you are. But your value as a human being will always remain.

Parents always want the best for their children, but in many cases this hope comes off as disappointment in the child for not exceeding their expectations. Because your parents want the best for you, it makes you feel like you will never be enough for them. You, as their child, are perfect in your own way and are good enough for you. Parents are imperfect beings that may not understand you and what you are going through, so it is important to be proud of who you are and not focus on what your parents want you to be. You are amazing and your parents are lucky to have you as a child.

I know what that's like. Feeling like you constantly have to push harder, do more, be better. YOU are the only one who gets to determine what's "good enough". If you know you are doing your best, you are more than good enough. Sometimes parents can be pressuring and insensitive without realizing. Have a sit down talk with mom and/or dad about how you feel and what you want to do to move forward. If you want to have a better relationship with them, find a time to talk and let them know how you feel. Start with "Sometime I feel like...when you..." Sometime's it all just one HUGE misunderstanding, you all are capable of getting through this stronger but ONLY if you communicate. Feel free to find me and we can chat if you need some support on how/when to talk to them or if there is a specific issue you'd like to address. Good luck!

This is something I’ve personally dealt with a lot. You just have to remember that there is nothing wrong with you, and it’s not that you aren’t “good enough” because if you’re trying then yes you are good enough. It can be tough when you’re parents don’t show approval because we all look up to our parents and want them to be proud of us. But sometimes you have to realize that you may never have your parents approval, but the problem isn’t you, and that as long as you’re trying your best and you’re happy with yourself then everything will be ok.

When parents express dissatisfaction with their children it usually stems from their own dissatisfaction with themselves. Their parents or parental figures made them feel like they weren’t good enough so they do the same thing to you. This may or may not be the case with you but in my experience, parents and people alike often project how they feel about themselves onto those around them. Just know that their treatment of you has nothing to do with your innate value or worth. It’s them that has insecurities about themselves and, as cliché as it sounds, misery loves company. But you can choose to believe what they try to tell you about yourself or you can remember that you were born more than enough even if they are too wrapped up in their own mistakes to see it. I hope this helps.

This is probably your perception and not theirs. You are responsible to yourself for personal development and doing that is an expression of joy. Find things to do that are worthwhile and see your inner worth increase. Talk to friends and people you respect about things to pursue. Ask God to help you with this. Often your inner voice is helpful. but you will have to listen for it. You and your community will benefit as you develop into the person you want to be. The world needs people to develop their skills and hopefully to help others.

Sometimes, people (especially parents and family) can have unrealistic expectations. This is not your fault and it can make you feel like you are not good enough for your parents. It's important that you know that you are enough and you are amazing :) Sometimes, it can help to make a list of the things that you feel you are good at (if you don't know, you can ask a friend) and do those things often. That way, you can remind yourself that no matter what other people say, you are enough.

It's important to know that some people will have unrealistic and harmful expectations for you. It's very painful but It doesn't make you "not good enough." They will have their own complex feelings and reasons as to why they have the expectations they have, but that's not your fault or your responsibility. Family relationships are very difficult and complex, so don't blame yourself for what you're going through. Your responsibility is to be someone that YOU are proud of, that is good enough for you. You, as a person, are valuable in and of yourself. You are already enough. You have always been enough. It's okay to just be you.

A lot of times in life, parents want the best for their children and continually try to push them to do better things and improve upon themselves. However, sometimes they get a bit too overzealous with these emotions and get to a point where they can't appreciate the things that you do. Remind yourself that you are good enough and that you don't need another person's approval to prove that. As long as you do what you want to do in life that brings you meaning and fulfillment, that's amazing. Being humble and wanting to improve yourself is great, just remember to appreciate yourself for the things you do.

Your parents must have really high expectations in this case. However, I believe you should be living for yourself rather because in the end you're going to be independent out there in the world. Talking with your parents and discussing that you believe their expectations is too high is also a good idea because they might also have a valid reason as to why their expectation is this high- possibly beneficial advice before you enter society. This isn't really easy to answer because personally, I had the same experience but I just tried my hardest and put 100% of my effort in until I was good enough and made them proud.

Parents often want the best for their children. In healthy relationships that amounts to encouragement, support, but also constructive critique when it is needed. In unhealthy relationships with parents, children can be pitted against each other or others. This leads to unnecessary competition that can cause children to feel “never good enough”. Likewise, it’s unfortunately not uncommon parents live out their dreams through their children, “I never learned to play violin, so you should be thankful,” or similar lines can be heard. These parents won’t ever be satisfied or proud and keep pushing their children under the guise of “wanting what’s best” even though it has little to do with the children’s desires. It’s critical to realise it’s not about achievements or lack thereof. Break the cycle by focusing on what you want and need and let go of any feelings of obligation.

Parents generally want the best for you. Sometimes, parents might express their care by telling you to do this and that in order to prepare for success in life. Their idea of success is using ways that pressure you into doing things that they believe is best for you. Even if you do them in order to make your parents happy, rather than yourself, they might feel like you could do better in comparison to all of their children of their friends. You aren't necessarily not good enough for your parents; they just feel like you could do better even if you are trying your best.

These feelings of not being good enough for my parents is something that I have personally struggled with. The truth is that it is impossible for us to always live up to high expectations and a lot of times, our parents don't realize what they expect of us is too much for us to handle. The best way is to try your absolute best in everything that you do, and if you fail that is okay! Failure is part of life. Failure is what teaches us and helps us learn. So if you think that you are not good enough for your parents, just remember that their expectations are just too high and to try your best.

Sometimes parents have such high expectations that seem impossible to reach, know that you are doing the best you can and the fact that you are self aware about this shows that you care deeply about your parents and how they view you. You just want to make them proud and that can be hard. Talk to them and make sure you are on the same page about things you do and how they feel about what you are doing. Know that you recognize their concerns, and you are willing to work with them when they understand where you are in life.

everyone is expecting different things from their children. It's just a boundary in your mind that you feel you are not enough. Yes of course we are not enough but its our decision to develop ourselves. Our parents wants the best for us that's why they always say their opinion about it, criticize it. everyone is expecting different things from their children. It's just a boundary in your mind that you feel you are not enough. Yes of course we are not enough but its our decision to develop ourselves. Our parents wants the best for us that's why they always say their opinion about it, criticize it.

Parents always want their children to be better and more successful than they are. Parents are not perfect, and they may not realize how much stress they put on their children to succeed. My father had depression, and he did not have a father in his life. He put a lot of pressure on me to be successful in school. A lot of times parents draw on their own experiences for their parenting skills. As a parent myself, I am breaking the cycle of lackluster parenting skills in my family. The biggest thing a person can do when they feel that they are not good enough for their parents is having an assertive conversation about how their parents make them feel.

I am sorry that is how you feel, and I am sorry that is what your parents made you believe. You are more than enough. This is not a you problem here. This sounds like a problem concerning your parents' standards. If you ever doubt yourself, just ask yourself questions such as "when will it be enough in their standards?" and "am I proud of myself?" and "what have I accomplished that I am proud of." Sometimes, it's about communication with one's parents. Maybe they are proud of you but are having a hard time showing that to you. Do you feel as if asking them this question will help you communicate?

This is a question that no one can really answer. It is easy to think that because they are your parents and they raised you, that would be enough for them to love and support you but sadly some parent figures do not feel that way. It is like if you do not accomplish everything that they wanted to themselves, they are disappointed, it has become more common that parents try to live out their dreams through their children not caring about what they want. Those that bring life into this world are sometimes very careless and reckless and there is not a real explanation why.

It is often not the case of not being good enough. Parents usually want the best for their children, hence they tend to sometimes ask way too much from children. Even though it seems like they are always disappointed by our life choices and / or actions, behaviours, the main reason why they tend to act as if they found us not good enough is their worries regarding our future and life in general. This does not mean you are not good enough, but you are not in the best place you could be in their point of view. Parents see their children’s potential and want them to achieve as much as possible! Just know it is because they care and they have the best interest at heart.