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Why can't I control my fears?

13 Answers
Last Updated: 07/06/2016 at 4:25pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
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Cynthia Stocker, LCSW, LICSW

Clinical Social Work/Therapist

My approach is direct, kind, honest & collaborative. My clients appreciate that I help them in a way that cuts through the jargon and gives clear explanations.

Top Rated Answers
Brielle224
April 21st, 2015 7:17pm
You can not control your fears because they take up your mind and your thoughts. Your mind is a powerful thing and it is very hard to control sometimes, it takes time. But if you practice breathing and staying calm, you can learn how to face these fears and they can eventually go away. You will learn that your much more powerful and stronger than any fear your mind can possibly come up with.
therapinto
March 1st, 2015 1:22pm
Imagine you have a fear for tests. And you know well in advance about the test you have next week. Your mind will think about the future possibilities following the test and will create a vicious cycle of negative thoughts. So what you can do is sit down, start deep breathing and think about the tests, you will have better chances of having positive and fearless thoughts. Start counting backwards. The best way to overcome the fear is to face it without considering the fact that you fear that thing.
Anonymous
March 3rd, 2015 4:01am
Fears are not meant to be controlled. Rather than try to control your fears, consider facing them instead. If you can find out why you're afraid in the first place, perhaps you can confront your fear as a whole.
kiddocharrr
May 18th, 2015 7:18pm
Because fears gives our brain to think automatically we can't do anything to get rid of our fears . we just need to stay fear to that thing . but come to think of it when you try to fight for your fears . it'll gives you courage to do things more because you are less in every fears you're facing . and don't forget that always "face your fear" and you'll learn from your own experience . :)
kindheartsamm
June 8th, 2015 11:12am
we have not much knowledge about the matter which make us fear full. so when we understand the matter we control the fear about the matter.
magicalsummer152
June 17th, 2015 5:28pm
If fears could be controlled by you they wouldnt have been your fears but you can always try face them..when you think its best to run away from them..and yes that is tough..really but once you get though it its all gone...best of luck with those fears of yours because i noe you can over come them if only you believe in yourself
RachxTheLight
June 22nd, 2015 1:42am
Everyone has fears,and it is completely normal to not be able to get over them so easily. Slowly taking the time to get closer to it and learning to be okay with it is what it will take.
Anonymous
August 4th, 2015 2:56am
When someone you really love passes away, you get to know grief. There is no way around it. That's the same with fears. You just can't control your emotions because they are a part of you. The only thing you can do is managing to cope with your emotions like fears.
NanaAthene
October 27th, 2015 1:08am
Probably because you haven't learned to face them yet. Which isn't a bad thing, it takes some people months to years to face them, let alone control them. Just freely face them knowing you'll be alright and if it doesn't go as planned, make sure you have a good support system to help back you up.
AlanRY
December 7th, 2015 9:11pm
You do control your fears, and for some reason you bring your attention to observing scary scenes you imagine in your head, as many of us like me have done for years. My take is you imagine scary scenes with the intention to protect yourself by rehearsing for them in your head. Yet that won't avoid those scenes if they were ever to happen. What I opted for in that situation was to trust that I would be ok, and that whatever falls on my lap I will be able to handle. And yes, trusting while feeling vulnerable can be so anxious-making and excruciating... so now I meditate to relieve myself from anxiety, too.
Greatlistener87
June 28th, 2016 3:19am
The idea is to face them and realize that there is nothing to worry about. It is easier said then done. Take it 1 fear at a time.
allnaturalHeart64
July 5th, 2016 12:41pm
Take slow deep breaths. You have to face your fears if you won't them to disappear. You can control your fears when you don't let it get the better of you. Keep breathing. You can do this.
BlueFrost123
July 6th, 2016 4:25pm
Ask yourself if there is any evidence to prove that what you fear is true and need to be feared . Don't let your past cloud your judgement . :) It's a long path but don't give up .