What do I say to people that ask about my scars without making them uncomfortable?

194 Answers
Last Updated: 01/16/2020 at 9:25pm
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Top Rated Answers
SquishyRaspberries
July 28th, 2016 4:52am
It's not always a good idea to be totally open about why you have scars, but if people are genuinely curious and you're comfortable talking about it then it's fine to say why you have them. Another good response is to just tell them that you're not comfortable talking about why you have scars and leaving it at that.
aturquoisezebra
July 29th, 2016 9:54am
I don't think it's 'what' you say as much as it is 'how' you say it. I think people tend to feel uncomfortable when they know that we are uncomfortable talking about it. If you truly are uncomfortable, then just let them know that it's a topic you don't really like to discuss, and I'm sure they'll respect you enough to breeze past it. But from your question, it sounds like you don't actually mind sharing about your scars, so perhaps look inward for starters - meaning, ask yourself it it's really something you have accepted, and are moving on from. It is nothing to be embarrassed or ashamed of, so you don't have to insinuate those things by your tone. You can just state your past as a matter of fact - which it is - and help them understand what stage of progression you are at now.
shoshho
July 29th, 2016 11:46am
you can give them the true answer or you can say that it was due to some troubles of the past and these are my victory marks that show I made it. Or you can make up a constant excuse and stick with it.
Anonymous
August 1st, 2016 2:25pm
I was in a bad place once but I got the help I needed and figured there is more to life I'm glad I got the courage to ask for help
youareimportantlove
August 3rd, 2016 3:14am
I would say that I was going through a hard time in my life and it was personal. I feel like they would understand.
wintersoldier59
August 3rd, 2016 4:20am
Explain to them that you've been through a rough time in your life. You don't have to go through the details if you don't want to. I'm sure they'll understand.
Anonymous
August 5th, 2016 8:07pm
You should say that they are your mistakes and that you learnt such great lessons from that experience
Missionmagic101
August 7th, 2016 11:44pm
In my opinion, you don't need to answer if you don't want to. Any answer is perfectly fine, wether you come up with an excuse by yourself or tell the truth. People should not be uncomfortable with anyone's struggles. They should be proud of them to be here today.
Anonymous
August 12th, 2016 12:14pm
Tell them, only if you are comfortable, that you were going through a bad time but now you're healing. If you feel that you aren't progressing tell them that you have trouble expressing your emotions and that you're trying and would love some help.
awesomeSoul43
August 14th, 2016 9:07am
You tell them you scars are a sign that you have gone through life and tried and failed and that your not perfect but your human and your beautiful the way you are
Anonymous
August 14th, 2016 9:04pm
Tell them that people deal with stress in different ways and that you decided to go down a more negative route that other people; it's like smoking because you cut as a release for something that has hurt you or that's bothering you and smokers smoke for the same reasons.
orangerosess
August 14th, 2016 10:24pm
if you want to tell the truth, tell them you used to hurt yourself but found a better way to deal with the pain.
Anonymous
August 19th, 2016 8:26pm
Worry first about yourself. Make sure that whatever you say is within your comfort zone, then worry about theirs. If you aren't uncomfortable at all, or have found something you are comfortable saying, then move on to them. The truth is always a worthy approach.
Anonymous
August 20th, 2016 3:43am
Just be honest with people, they brought it apon themselves to ask you about them therefore you should be real, if it makes them uncomfortable next t ime they will remember not to ask questions to things they shouldn't be asking..
Anonymous
August 21st, 2016 4:25am
Just explain that you had a rough time in life. That you overcame the challenges which you were facing.
Anonymous
August 21st, 2016 10:18pm
Everyone has something to get them through the day. It can work with any addiction to 'harmful' things
bokchoi
September 3rd, 2016 12:45pm
I usually say they're from "harder times", but that's only because i don't have any new ones. Generally, if you seem comfortable with them, people will be less likely to uncomfortable.
Anonymous
September 8th, 2016 9:56pm
It's best to be honest, if they're uncomfortable about discussing self-harm, then that means we need to work more to make it okay to talk about. Getting uncomfortable is the start of that. Tell them it's from a battle. They're from a hard time. You used to struggle. If you want to make things lighter, focus on the fact that they're scars, not new wounds. That you're much better than you were then.
Anonymous
September 10th, 2016 7:18pm
It's your decision to tell them and what you want to tell them. You can just say the truth or you can tell them you're not willing to talk about them.
TranquilWillow
September 15th, 2016 9:17pm
I've told them that they are beautiful reminders of the past that has made me a better and stonger today
cincin66
September 18th, 2016 3:13am
I have had troubles in the past. But I want you to know that you can change. Overcoming our issues are difficult however if we look at the accomplishments we can see they are greater.
Anonymous
September 22nd, 2016 2:28am
First, try to work on caring less about people being uncomfortable about your scars. Love yourself by caring about other people's judgments less. You deserve to walk around without worrying about being judged for your scars.
plushEars54
September 22nd, 2016 2:09pm
Just tell them that you were going through a rough time. If they care about you, then they'll understand, and may want to help you.
Keewee070102
September 22nd, 2016 5:51pm
I say it's the way that I used to cope (or still do cope) with difficult or uncontrollable situations that I have been through and when I am in a really bad place. I know that people don't understand but just remember that I would never hurt another person and I am getting help and getting better so don't worry.
soothingBeauty
September 26th, 2016 8:07pm
If you are comfortable with your scars then you tell them straight up with a smile on your face what they are. I would say, "these scars are a representation of my past bad memories, and they help me not to turn back"
Anonymous
September 26th, 2016 8:22pm
You could try to talk in a comfortable manner. This means that you can just start like " Oh this,I got this ......" It also depends on your body language, try to smile in a casual way and speak in a casual tone.
Anonymous
September 27th, 2016 2:11am
tell them what happened, but at the end tell them that if they have questions, then asking them is acceptable.
Lewkas
October 1st, 2016 12:48am
I often thank people for showing concern, and let them know that my scars are old wounds that have long since healed; this both recognises and acknowledges their worries while reaffirming that you're in a safe and healthy place.
MachineGKyla
October 5th, 2016 2:29pm
"I went to war, and these are my battle scars." That's what I said when some of my friends asked me, they looked at me and nodded and didn't say anything after that.
AlwaysNite98
October 6th, 2016 8:41am
You dont owe anybody an explanation for you having scars on your body. That is personal to you and unless this person is a close friend or family member its rather rude for them to ask. If you dont want to tell them the reasons for your scars just tell them ''Im not comfortable telling you that.''