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7 Cups Behavior Reporting Process & Tracking - Updated Version
by ASilentObserver
Last post
2 days ago
...See more All, The post below outlines an updated behavior reporting process! We had originally launched this in 2016 and we are now updating it and re-emphasizing it as we move forward. Our objective to streamline the process and keep you well informed. Not many people struggle with a number of behavior points, but for people that do, we want to ensure that you can take steps to improve your behavior and be part of the community. We are figuring out the best ways to manage unhelpful & un-supportive behaviors on 7 Cups. Once you have reviewed the entire post, please ask any questions or share your constructive thoughts. This process is designed to provide you an opportunity to improve. We do not have any intentions to punish anyone but we do need to keep people accountable for their behavior. It is your community and how you behave, impacts it as well. Our purpose is to provide a better help & support and compassionate environment to all. We all want to be part of a community that fosters high warmth and high expectations. It is the best way to lead a community because everyone deserves support and compassion. Growing a plant, for example, requires a lot of effort, care, and the right treatment. Not every plant growth is similar but the basic process is somewhat the same. Suitable environment, the right proportion of soil, water, sunlight. Knowing the right conditions is significant for a seed to grow into a beautiful plant. Similarly for a community: If you have high warmth but low expectations, then structure or its culture is low. If you have low warmth and high expectations, then it has a structure, but limited reliability and safety. If you have low warmth and low expectations, then neither has a structure nor culture. If you have high warmth and high expectations, it has structure and reliability and safety. So here we are focused on providing both so that the community can have increased trust, support, culture, safety, and compassion. A few points to keep in mind when reading the below: * We believe in second chances. We know and understand no one is perfect and can improve. But, we need to understand when you have an opportunity to improve, you strive to improve and show that you improved. Value the opportunities you have. * We believe in inclusivity. We welcome all constructive feedback. Because we are also not perfect and striving to improve. Feedback is a two-way process. Ensure to provide feedback in a compassionate, constructive, and respectful manner. * We believe in accountability. Everyone is responsible and accountable for their actions. Because action has a reaction and impacts someone. We are in a community setup, so how you act impacts community activities. If you are supportive, the activities flow in a positive way. If you act unsupportive, the activity flow gets interrupted. * We believe transparency is helpful. As a community member, it is your right to know what is happening with the reports and how it gets processed. So, we want to provide better transparency in our actions in this system. However, there are also natural limitations too. We will not be able to share or disclose in detail with the community at large things that are happening on an individual basis. Because a wise person said, Praise in public, criticize in private. We want to give everyone a second chance to improve and feel encouraged to improve. The below behavior rating system has been specifically designed to meet the community's needs. We considered all inputs and tried to include all that was feasible to add. As you review this post, please remember this is a work in progress and always be updated as per the community's needs. Please share all constructive feedback, inputs, and ideas on what is missing or what does not make sense and what can be done. Introduction The aim of this guide is to provide information and to help you understand how the Behavioral Points System would work. What is the Behavioral Rating System? It is a process we would be used to assign points based on the infractions they did in the community at a point in time. Every time, they commit a violation, they will be getting points assigned and informed through email so they know what violations they did, and what points assigned to them for the violations. So they can have the opportunity to learn from the mistakes they made and improve. But if they do not improve and they cross the threshold, they will face consequences. This is modeled after other point systems like having a driving license in the US. If a person drives in a safe and smart manner (they are a good member), then they will receive no points. If they drive through stop signs, then they get a point. If they drive dangerously, then they get more points. If a person accrues enough points, then they are required to go to driving school. If they still do not improve then they can lose their license and no longer drive. It is a systematic process where all reports will be included for a user. How does it work? * The system will be applicable to both listeners and members. * Each behavior report or flagged forum thread will be evaluated using the below point criteria. Points are cumulative. * Each point expires 6 months after it was earned. * If no reports within three months from the date of action, an 80% reduction in the points. Note: One can be able to apply for a leadership role. This includes Mentor roles, teen star, group mod, peer support, and project agent roles. * If zero reports within a month from the date of action, 40% reduction in the behavior score. Applicability of the system: The process will be applicable moving forward. It won't consider past reports. Except for the reports which are severe. It will be up to the Community Management Teams' decision for those reports. How reports are filed? Reports filed via specific behavior reports: The incoming report will be reviewed by the concerned team. It will be reviewed for accuracy and if one of the below behaviors is identified the following actions will be taken: The authority sends a warning message to the reported user letting them know about the report. If the user would like to provide their side of the story, they will be invited to do that. Point(s) will be assigned if the user assumes responsibility for the action and agrees that it happened. The authority will let the user know the point has been assigned. If the user does not accept responsibility for the behavior and the evidence that the behavior did occur is clear, point(s) will be assigned. It is requested of all reporters that they submit relevant screenshots to prove their accusations for a user. All points will be tallied and tracked on the community management team's backend panel. Dates will be logged to monitor the timing. Please click here for more information on how to provide constructive feedback. [https://www.7cups.com/forum/SafetyKnowledgeat7Cups_181/CommunityGuidelines_1374/KeepingForumsWelcomingandSupportiveForumGuidelinesUpdate_229098/1/#2446886] You can learn more about triangulation here [https://www.7cups.com/forum/ListenersOnlyForums_38/LaurasOffice_169/WhatisTriangulation3StepstoAvoidingStoppingitfromhappeninginthecommunity_35107/1/] Learn more about rumors spreading here [https://www.7cups.com/forum/TeensOnlyClub_123/IarasStation_590/RumorsandGossipHowtoprotectourcommunityfromsuchbehaviorMemberSideedition_39670/]. Learn what open communication is here [https://www.7cups.com/forum/SafetyKnowledgeat7Cups_181/Guidesonhowtomanagesituationson7cups_1059/OpenCommunicationTipsTricks_26627/1/]. Important Notes: � All the behaviors identified above are common behavior identified in the specific areas. Though, if the same behavior is found in other parts of the community as well, the points and consequences will be applicable. Zero Points Behavior. They are applicable for the first instance only. If the behavior continues, the points will be assigned according to the severity of the reported behavior. Except for a few specific behaviors that are subjected only to listeners. All other behaviors are subject to both listeners and members of the community. Adult Teen Listeners- In case of violations, the badge and access will be removed instantly. Below you will find the corresponding consequences of the above behaviors. Red Flag Offenses: � Forum Spam - If you are repeatedly spamming the forums with inappropriate content or advertisements you or your account may be removed Post inappropriate or graphic pictures, your account will be removed Sexting and/or repeatedly sexting (after a given warning not to) will result in account removal Underage or in the wrong age community (you must be 15 to be a listener & 13 to be a member) Red Flag Consequences: Immediate removal from 7 Cups community Protocol on Getting Support from a community leader: If you are having a problem, you may approach a community leader for support on how to manage that situation. However, please refrain from telling them specific details. As a general rule when communicating with community leaders: we should avoid using names and specific details about a person or a given situation. For example, if you are having a conflict with another listener. You could go to the community leader and say I am struggling with a difficult situation. Could you give me some tips on how to use conflict resolution? In this example, no specific details are mentioned, but you are still able to ask for help as you work through a difficult situation. Footnote: The protocols are similar to earlier ones and shared from the previous update with few changes. Updated the constructive feedback point in accordance with the new forum guideline [https://www.7cups.com/forum/SafetyKnowledgeat7Cups_181/CommunityGuidelines_1374/KeepingForumsWelcomingandSupportiveForumGuidelinesUpdate_229098/1/#2446886] on Sep 23, 2020 - Hope Link here to Heather's clarification post on BPS https://www.7cups.com/forum/SiteUpdates_100/HsHangout_1970/SomeclarificationonLLReports_230570/ Guidelines with better view available in the Community Guidelines page, Click here [https://www.7cups.com/community-guidelines/7-Cups-Behavioral-Points-System-70ccca9adfef4babba74119da05a91d4] [edited by MistyMagic to remove scripts and add in H's post 30 Oct 2020]
Heather225 profile picture
Apply for the Safety Patrol Team! (Now Open to Listeners and Members)
by Heather225
Last post
August 20th
...See more Are you passionate about our community? Are you always looking out for the safety of others? We are looking for dedicated community members to scan for inappropriate profiles and flag them so they can be removed quickly and efficiently from the site! We are very excited to announce that members can now join the team! Here’s what being on the Safety Patrol looks like:: - Scan the browse listeners page [https://www.7cups.com/BrowseListeners/] daily and flag any inappropriate profiles - Scan the general request queue daily for inappropriate profiles - Scan forums or group rooms for inappropriate profiles - Be proactive to help flag any profile you have seen anywhere that is inappropriate How do we know if it's inappropriate? - Sexual or graphic profile picture - Sexual or graphic username - Sexual or graphic bio text - Profile bio text sharing social media handles, email Id..etc. Prerequisites & Expectations: ✓ Listeners: You must be a Verified Listener [https://www.7cups.com/forum/ListenerLearningJourney_149/VerifiedListenersProject_1839/IWanttobeaVerifiedListener_46935/1/] ✓ Members: You must be a part of the community for at least one month (no longer have the Newbie badge) ✓ You must be active on 7 Cups a few times a week (roughly an hour minimum) ✓ You will be required to read a document on best practices [https://docs.google.com/document/d/1vBXLvo7gLMewIM1lhnZ2g8MXAnq4sMwxqXgxzTJCDos/edit] and pass a test to prove your knowledge. ✓ Once you have read the guide in full and understand the material, apply and take the test here. [https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSeiPkuyjGZs7x2NY5b1tgkO5QoRRiXzFFobMpHiWthKUxgaKg/viewform] Primary Points of Contact Team Leader: Rebekah Thank you so much for your interest in keeping 7 Cups a safe and supportive place! [ Updated by Rebekah on 4th January 2023 to display newer guide. ] [ Updated by Rebekah on 25th February 2026 to amend the leaders list. ]
Heather225 profile picture
Community Safety Awareness: Listener Conduct, Soliciting & Offsite
by Heather225
Last post
August 11th
...See more Hi everyone, Your safety, privacy, and trust are the most important things to us at 7 Cups. You come here for a safe, supportive space to be heard, and we are committed to protecting that. We want to post a critical reminder about the rules our volunteer Listeners must follow. This is to ensure every member knows what to expect and what is never acceptable. Listeners are volunteers. Support is always free. 7 Cups Listeners are volunteers. They are here to provide empathetic listening and support, and they are never paid for their time. * A Listener should NEVER ask you for money, donations, or payment of any kind. * Listeners are strictly prohibited from soliciting or promoting any personal, paid services (e.g., "I am a therapist, here is my link, my sessions cost $X"). To protect your privacy and safety, all conversations with Listeners should stay on the 7 Cups platform. * Listeners are not permitted to ask you to move the conversation to an off-site, personal platform (like  Tele*gram WhatsApp,, social media accounts, or personal email). * If a Listener sends you a personal link to chat elsewhere, do not click it. This is a serious violation of our guidelines. Listeners are trained to listen. They are not therapists or healthcare professionals.  * A Listener's role is to listen, not to give diagnoses, medical advice, or tell you what to do. * Offering their own paid therapy service (as mentioned in point #1) is a severe violation of this boundary and our community's trust. If a Listener ever does any of the following: * Asks you for money or payment. * Tries to sell you a personal, paid service (like therapy or coaching). * Sends you a link to chat on a personal, off-site platform  Please take these steps immediately: * Do not click any personal links, disclose any of your personally identifying information (including your social media), or send money. * Report the Listener: Use our Helpdesk HERE [https://help.7cups.com/hc/en-us/requests/new/]. Make sure to add screenshots when submitting your report so the team has evidence to corroborate the report and take appropriate action. It's also important to understand that these rules are fundamental community guidelines. As such, they apply to members too. Review the Community Guidelines for all users to abide by HERE. [https://www.7cups.com/community-guidelines/] ------------------------- Thank you for helping us uphold these core principles and safeguard the 7 Cups experience for everyone!
Remina profile picture
A Friendly Reminder About Listener Accounts & Seeking Support
by Remina
Last post
July 11th
...See more Hi everyone! 💙 I wanted to post a quick reminder for both listeners and members about the purpose of listener accounts. Recently, I've noticed several listener accounts creating forum threads to vent or seek personal emotional support. I completely understand that listeners are human too and experience difficult days. Everyone deserves support. However, it's important that support is sought from the appropriate account. As stated in the Forum Guidelines: "Users are expected to maintain a listener role if on a listener account. This includes not seeking emotional or personal support and following the expectations of a listener outlined in active listening. Please switch to a member account if necessary." This guideline exists to help maintain healthy boundaries and professionalism on the platform. It also promotes listener self-care and helps prevent role reversal between listeners and members. At 7 Cups, we take the listener role seriously and ask that listeners remain focused on providing support while using a listener account. If a listener needs support themselves (and we all do sometimes!), the expectation is to switch to a member account before seeking that support. This helps maintain clear expectations and ensures members continue receiving quality support. I also want to mention something I've seen come up from time to time. Sometimes a thread that doesn't follow the guidelines may remain visible for a little while before a moderator reviews it. Please don't assume that because you see a post still up, it means the behavior is allowed. There can occasionally be a delay in moderation, but posts that violate the guidelines are reviewed and, when appropriate, removed. If you're a member or listener and notice a listener account creating posts that appear to be seeking personal support, venting, using excessive profanity, or otherwise posting in a way that would be more appropriate from a member account, please consider flagging the post so moderators like myself can review it. Your reports genuinely help us keep the community safe and consistent. Likewise, if you come across one of these posts, please avoid providing personal emotional support to the listener through that thread. Instead, encourage them to switch to a member account, where they can receive the support they deserve while also protecting the boundaries that help our community function well. Finally, I encourage everyone—both listeners and members—to take a few minutes to read (or reread) the Forum Guidelines (click here [https://www.7cups.com/community-guidelines/p/Forum-Guidelines-3c989621981b4b6db6c722d76274b058]). They answer many common questions and help ensure we're all contributing to a supportive, respectful community. Thank you all for everything you do to make 7 Cups a safe and welcoming place for everyone. 💙
Remina profile picture
🚩 When & Why to Flag Forum Posts (and Why It Really Helps)
by Remina
Last post
December 31st, 2025
...See more Flagging posts isn’t about getting someone “in trouble.” It’s about keeping the community safe, supportive, and running smoothly — like quietly pointing out a spill so no one slips. 🧹💚 Here’s a quick guide on when to flag, why it matters, and what not to engage with. 🧭 When Should You Flag a Forum Post? You might consider flagging if a post includes: 🧯 Spam or Advertising Spam can be random links, promotions, or repeated copy-paste messages. It can also be bots or accounts clearly not seeking or offering support. 👉 Why flag instead of replying? Replying boosts visibility and encourages more spam. Flagging helps moderators remove it quickly and keeps the forum readable for everyone. 🧍 A Listener Seeking Support Sometimes listeners post about their own distress, burnout, or personal struggles. That is human AND it is important to handle it the right way.  👉 What to do: Flag the post so a moderator can see it and reach out to the listener. If you comment to the post, kindly encourage them to switch to a member account for support. 👉 Why this matters: Listeners deserve support too, but listener spaces aren’t meant for receiving care. Using a member account protects boundaries, anonymity, and emotional safety for everyone involved. 🚨 Content That Breaks Forum Guidelines This can be graphic, unsafe, or triggering material. It can also be harassment, hate speech, or aggressive behavior. It can also be requests for help that requires crisis or professional intervention. You can click here [https://www.7cups.com/forum/7cupsleadership/SafetyGuidelines_1374/ExpandedForumGuidelinesMasterpost_167937/]for more forum guidelines to be aware of. Flagging these posts help ensures the right people can step in appropriately. It is important not to respond to material that violates guidelines and flag instead. 🛑 A Quick Note About Not Engaging With Spam Sometimes it can be tempting to respond with "This is spam" "Why are you posting this?" or "LOL what is this??" It is totally understandable but skipping replies and just flagging is the most helpful move. No attention = no fuel 🌱 Flagging = Community Care Flagging is...  ✅ Supportive ✅ Preventive ✅ A way to look out for fellow members and listeners Flagging keeps the forums welcoming, safe, and focused on what they are here for: support, connection, and care. Thanks for being part of what makes this space kind and functional. Even if you feel unsure about a post, it is always okay to flag the post. A trained moderator will then review the flag. If you have any questions about forum flagging, please ask them here. Forum Ambassador @Tommy Project Agent @sunisshiningandsoareyou Global Community Mentors: @Pamharley003 @Izzyy528 and @heathermarie95
AffyAvo profile picture
Search Engines and 7 Cups Forums
by AffyAvo
Last post
November 20th, 2025
...See more Years ago, we were able to use Google to search the forums. For quite a while 7 cups forum threads weren't appearing in Google, or most other search engines. My understanding was this was due to privacy concerns.  I just found threads via Google today. There are pros and cons, I find the 7 cups search tool lacks a lot of things I want in a search tool. I can find what I need better with Google. There are also, understandably concerns about threads appearing via a search by random people (or perhaps not so random people), outside of 7 Cups. I don't know if the entire date range is searchable this way. I don't know about communities, I assume any that are badge-locked (listener-only forums, Teen Only Zone) aren't accessible to outside search engines, they weren't previously. I'm not confident though as AI has changed a lot of the internet.  @Tommy do you have any information?
AffyAvo profile picture
Profanity in the Forums
by AffyAvo
Last post
February 11th, 2023
...See more This post is to clarify when profanity (swearing, cursing) is allowed in the forums. Profanity is not allowed in thread titles, in any form. Users must be respectful of one another, so it cannot be used against other users. Some communities may choose to not allow it at all, please check the individual community guidelines by looking under About on that community page. Profanity may be used to express yourself when seeking support in forum posts. Be considerate when posting to a thread started by someone else, not everyone is comfortable having profanity in a thread. You may get around the censor in the forums so the entire word doesn’t appear as *** but please add a trigger warning if you do this. Do not use profanity excessively. (Note using profanity and avoiding the censor is prohibited in the group chatrooms). To summarize, you may use profanity if you are doing all of the below: * Using a member account * Being respectful of other 7 Cups users * Posting to a community that doesn’t prohibit profanity * It is not in a thread title * If you get around the censor you add a trigger warning [TW] in the Title * Not using it excessively You can read the 7 Cups Guidelines Here [https://www.7cups.com/community-guidelines/], profanity in the forums is covered under Excessive Inappropriate and Graphic Language of the forum guidelines. For listeners: Cursing is not considered professional behavior for a listener and would not be acting in the listener role. Rules in other areas of the site specify that listeners should always behave in a professional manner, and that graphic language should be avoided, particularly in public spaces (e.g., username, bio, or picture). With the censor, when *** appears in a post of yours it may be assumed profanity was used even if it was not. Please reach out, you can flag your post and make an edit request in the additional details or you can reach out to a forum team member, community mentor, or community mentor leader to have it edited.
Laura profile picture
Trolling: Mutual Responsibility! Here is how you can help!
by Laura
Last post
October 28th, 2022
...See more Hello everyone! Over the past few days, we have seen some trolling behaviors in the group support rooms, listener rooms and public forums. I know these can be unpleasant to see and participate in, but I wanted to provide some context to this and ask you all a special question. Imagine someone comes to your neighborhood and starts acting in a way that is publicly disruptive and hurtful. As a neighborhood, you are going to rally together to figure out who did this, ask for help and report them to the police (if appropriate). It is the entire communities duty to remove disruptive and ugly behavior. Similar to real life communities, we are all responsible for 7 Cups. If you see something, say something & ask for help! Mutual responsibility means that is it not one specific person's (or group of peoples) job to keep the entire neighborhood free from bad behavior, it's everyone's. This is OUR neighborhood and we all share the responsibility of taking care of it. I want to encourage you all to help. If you see something, here is what you can do: -----> Is it in a group support room? We want to encourage you to engage in the following behavior: 1) Ask in any of the listener chatrooms if a group mod can help. - Review a full list of every group mod on this browse listeners page [https://www.7cups.com/BrowseListeners/?badge=139]. Reach out to any that are currently available and ask for some help! 2) Stay in the group room and try to encourage a positive, supportive conversation to the best of your ability. Ignore this person and their behavior. Keeping the positive energy in the room up is critical! -----> Listener chat room? We want to encourage you to engage in the following behavior: 1) Review the other listener chatrooms to see if a mentor (or teen star) is available to help. - Review a full list of every chatroom mentor on this browse listeners page. [https://www.7cups.com/BrowseListeners/?badge=107]Reach out to any that are currently available and ask for some help! 2) Stay in the listener chatroom and try to encourage a positive, supportive conversation to the best of your ability. Ignore this person and their behavior. Show others in the room that this will be okay and lead by example. Keeping the positive energy in the room up is critical! -----> Is this behavior in the forums? Here is what you can do: 1) If you are a listener, ask in any of the listener chatrooms if a forum mentor is around to help. 2) Review a full list of every forum mentor on this browse listeners page. [https://www.7cups.com/BrowseListeners/?badge=108]Reach out to any that are currently available and ask for some help! Help us name a special badge to honor those who help out! All fun ideas welcome! It is everyone's responsibility to help remove these behaviors and bad actors from our neighborhood. Anyone who helps to remove these behaviors from the neighborhood will have the opportunity to let us know and earn a special badge indicating their dedication to mutual responsibility and keeping our neighborhood loving, supportive, clean and compassionate! Now...what should we call this special badge? Post your ideas and comments to this in this thread!
ASilentObserver profile picture
Mod Actions Log!
by ASilentObserver
Last post
July 11th, 2022
...See more Hello Chatroom Mentors and Group Moderators, As you know we introduced the Behavioral Rating System [https://www.7cups.com/forum/SafetyKnowledgeat7Cups_181/BehavioralRatingSystem_2108/2020s7CupsBehaviorReportingProcessTrackingUpdatedVersion_226446/], we need your help to ensure effective implementation of the system. We need your help with reporting the events where you muted the user for breaking any chatroom guidelines. To log those events, please fill out this short form [https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfc8XVpOZew0T4wN3zWoGw9UDTnkSGDRea9IQW9B9zYETsxlw/viewform]. Please bookmark the form and help us. Your efforts and contributions will be much appreciated. Thank you!!
Tazzie profile picture
Conflict Resolution Tips
by Tazzie
Last post
September 18th, 2021
...See more ❝Peace is not absence of conflict, it is the ability to handle conflict by peaceful means.❞ ❑ Step back and slow down Avoid repeating unhelpful behaviors in conflicts. Habits can be changed through awareness. Think before you put your words across in order to avoid something that will escalate the conflict. ❑ Show clarity regarding your intentions and goals for the conversation Avoid blaming or changing another person's point of view. Listen to learn something new and express your views and feelings professionally. ❑ Avoid assumptions and ask questions to explore the other persons story Listen to the person on the opposite end as they will more likely try to understand you. Do not convince them you are right. Be aware of potential barriers to listening. ❑ Express your feelings without holding the other person accountable for the conflict Use I statements to express yourself. State a feeling rather than judging. ❑ Be responsible for your assumptions On the internet, messages can be interpreted in several ways. To think that your beliefs and conclusions about others are the truth, will only escalate the conflict. Share your interpretation of the messages received. ❑ Find a common ground Reaching a common ground will make it easier to resolve the conflict and will diffuse defensiveness. Reference - https://bit.ly/2OshbrE
Sunisshiningandsoareyou profile picture
Practice situation : Group Chatroom
by Sunisshiningandsoareyou
Last post
September 11th, 2021
...See more You are In a chatroom and someone mentions feeling unsafe and crisis thoughts . What would you do in this situation? 💛 (learning together is more fun and beneficial to all , tag fellow cups users to share their thoughts too)
AffyAvo profile picture
Posting Tips: Avoiding Microaggressions and other Hurtful Comments
by AffyAvo
Last post
June 8th, 2021
...See more Sometimes, when making a post, or creating some other type of content we can accidentally do something that is hurtful to a group of people. This post provides some tips to avoid inadvertently making such a mistake. Am I using a term that refers to a group of people? - If so, do I actually want to refer to these people or something that comes from these people? If not, I should consider why this term is being used and if it’s an appropriate option. - Am I referring to the group in a positive, neutral or negative way? If negative, reconsider. Some examples where this can be problematic: Saying someone is great at doing something for someone who is part of a specific group. This implies that those in that group are generally below average at that skill. Using an identity as an adjective, where that adjective is being used in a way to poke fun. There are a number of games which have done this in the past, the games themselves ore often fine, but the naming often implies that a group doesn’t understand things, does nonsensical things,doesn’t follow the norm, etc. A specific example is a gift exchange where people have the option to steal a gift that someone else has opened. A fun, non-offensive name for this exchange is a Dirty Santa Exchange. I have also seen this called other names, involving nationalities that have nothing to do with the game’s origin, these can be offensive. Am I using an image that refers to a leader, group or symbolism that’s important to a group of people? - Do I intend to use this image in a way that refers to the importance? If not, why am I using it and would it be better to use something else? - Am I being respectful to the importance or am I insulting it in some way? - Is there anything I should be aware of in terms of clashes between groups? Ie. Maybe a leader has purposely done a lot of harm to another group of people. When giving a link, promoting something or celebrating something have I considered broader implications? - On a link, besides the information I wanted to give someone, have I looked at what else is present? Are there things that are likely to be problematic? If so, can I give information in another way? Can I be specific about what I want to share there while also acknowledging what could be a problem so someone is at least prepared. - Instead of promoting a person is it possible to promote the cause instead? If a group has been marginalized or harmed by a dominant group in the past, use a bit of caution especially if information is put out by the dominant group. - Are the terms, symbols, etc. being used ones that the group prefers to be used in relation to themselves? If uncertain about information consider asking friends who identify with the group connected to what you’re considering posting; their perspectives can offer a great deal of insight - Be considerate, people aren’t always open to talking although if being respectful many are willing to help and are happy to educate! These tips are not an exhaustive list but they can help you to be aware of potential blunders. Are there any tips you would add to this? Thanks to @KimsonTheSteveFundYPOC for your feedback and suggestions with preparing this post!
GlenM profile picture
Intervention for People that are Trolling
by GlenM
Last post
December 12th, 2020
...See more There are people on the Internet that enjoy getting a rise of people. They are sometimes referred to as trolls. I prefer to call them people that are behaving like trolls rather than trolls b/c I believe they are much more than just their trolling behavior. In fact, broadly, I think people that tend to troll can be smart, creative, and broadly under challenged in life. As many of you know, I have 4 kids. Sometimes they argue with one another. One might goad the other - kind of push their buttons - to purposely annoy them. I always tell my kids: Dont take the bait! Dont get hooked! Dont take the bait! Sometimes you here people say Dont feed the trolls and this means the same thing. You dont want to allow yourself to engage with someone who is just trying to get a rise out of you. What are the signs that someone might be trolling? In brief, they are messaging or posting with the goal of making you angry, upsetting you, or harassing you. Here are other signs from How-to-Geek: --Refusal to acknowledge evidence: Even when presented with hard, cold facts, they ignore this and pretend like they never saw it. --Off-topic remarks: Completely going off-topic from the subject at hand. This is done to annoy and disrupt other posters. --Dismissive, condescending tone: An early indicator of a troll was that they would ask an angry responder, Why you mad, bro? This is a method done to provoke someone even more, as a way of dismissing their argument altogether. --Use of unrelated images or memes: They reply to others with memes [https://www.howtogeek.com/356232/what-is-a-meme/], images, and gifs. This is especially true if done in response to a very long text post. --Seeming obliviousness: They seem oblivious that most people are in disagreement with them. Also, trolls rarely get mad or provoked. Trolling behavior, like most things, can exist on a spectrum - not really bad, mild, moderate or severe. My experience on 7 Cups has included all types of trolling. A sub-type of trolling can be sexual trolling where the person is trying to engage with you - sneakily - in a sexual manner. They might talk around the issue with the goal of trying to have a sexting type chat with you. We are at the beginning of creating a toolbox to help empower listeners better manage people that are trolling. We have ideas all over the forums. This one [https://www.7cups.com/forum/GroupSupport_168/InformationUpdates_822/TrollingImmunityOath_42720/1/] for example. We will start consolidating things here in this thread. Look for more info soon. In the meantime, I wanted to share a risk with you all that Id like all listeners to use when they encounter a person that is trolling: What to do when you suspect a person is trolling you. It can be enough to suspect it. When that happens, say: I know that life has likely been challenging for you. I understand that you might have been treated unfairly. I think that is partly why you are behaving towards me like you are right now. I believe that you are smart and creative and that trolling is likely not the best way to express your talents. You can keep behaving as a troll if you like; if things stay the same as they are now, then what do you think your life will look like in 3, 6, 9, or 12 months? My guess is that it will continue on the downward slope that it is on now. Take a second and really sink into that idea and imagine your future based on the trajectory you are now on. If that is what you want, then I will honor that choice. If that is not what you want and you want to take steps towards a future path that is more meaningful and fulfilling, then Im willing to help support you on that new path. The choice is yours. What do you want to do? Answer 1: Continue on the trolling path. Listener response: Okay, I wish you the best and hope things change for you in the future. Ill need to block and report you now. (Block and report the user) Answer 2: I want to take steps on the more meaningful path and strop trolling. Listener response: Okay, good, to show me that you mean it, I need you to show me that you are actively motivated to change. I want you to take 5 steps on your growth path and let me know what each step entailed so I can know you are being up front with me. I cannot spend any additional time talking with you until I have evidence that you have taken those 5 initial steps. Tips: You need to insist that the person answers the question. Dont let them sidetrack you. Stay on topic. If they become belligerent, then just say, From your behavior, it seems like you are choosing to continue trolling. Im blocking you and reporting you now. Bye. Please share other tips and ideas below. I continue to believe that people that troll have a lot of unrealized talent and creativity. We can collectively find ways to align with folks that want to help. At the same time, we will remain firm in our boundaries and strengthen our community and listeners.
AffyAvo profile picture
For Members - Reporting & Blocking from a 1-1 Chat
by AffyAvo
Last post
January 28th, 2020
...See more Not complete, more information to come! The following information is written for Members, for more generalized information on Reporting 1-1 chats go here [https://www.7cups.com/forum/SafetyKnowledgeat7Cups_181/7CupsSafetyToolsReportFormsMore_1371/ReportingEffectively_215915/]. There are 2 ways a member can report a listener they have been chatting with using the 1-1 tools - Writing a Review or Blocking The information on what each does, limitations, and how to do them are described below. Writing a Review *Note - Both a review and block can be done, but a listener cannot be reviewed if you have a block on them, so if you wish to do both it's easier if a review is done first. To write a review, click on the star - it says Leave an Anonymous Review if you hover over it: *star this will bring up a pop up box. This box will also appear after a certain number of messages are sent or if one of you clicks to end the chat. *box You can rate the listener out of 5 stars, and there is a 15 character minimum for the review. Once the review is sent, there is a team who looks them over and approves or rejects them. Reviews are only approved if they provide useful information with some detail has to how the chat went. Something like 'bad chat' will be rejected. See further below for more details on tips for giving a report within your review. There is also a post here [https://www.7cups.com/forum/Welcome_27/Thingstohelpyougetstarted_792/LeavingFeedbackforyourListeners_47408/1/]that is a bit out of date regarding the rating system, but the tips on writing reviews in general still applies. Limitations: A listener needs to send you at least 2 messages in order for you to review them. So if they never respond or only send 1 message, this option is not available. If you have already reviewed the listener you cannot write another review for them for 48 hours. If a listener has blocked you, you cannot review them How to Block To block a listener, click the general prohibition sign - it says Block this Connection *block Blocking can be done at any point during a 1-1 chat with a listener, including if they have taken your chat but not responded. Blocking prevents the listener from sending you more 1-1 messages as long as you leave it in place. If you do not wish to report with the block, select 'Other' from the drop down reasons. In the text box, you can type random characters or writes something like - not a good match - blocked for personal reasons - felt uncomfortable If you do wish to report, select the most appropriate reason from the drop down menu and give details in the textbox as to what they did that was inappropriate, see below for more tips on writing the review. Limitations This does not prevent the listener from responding to you in the forums or group chats. A block does not affect the star ratings a listener has, and when blocked you cannot give a rating. Reasons to Report an Inappropriate Listener - It can improve your personal safety at 7 Cups - It allows for listeners who wish to improve to get feedback on things they need to change - It can encourage a listener to get more help if they need it - It improves the overall quality of listeners and safety for everyone on 7 Cups When to Report (via a review, block, email, help center request or 1-1 to admin) - A listener acts in a harassing manner - A listener asks for offsite information - A listener refuses to respect your boundaries - A listener asks for nude or provocative pictures or sexts - A listener interferes with your ability to get support from other listeners - They are using more than 1 listener account - A listener is in crisis - A listener is in the wrong age group or is under the age of 15 - They take on a role outside the scope of what's expected from a listener [https://www.7cups.com/forum/NewbieHub_27/Informationaboutusing7Cups_792/WhatCanIExpectFromA7CupsListener_5609/1/], for example they advise you to use half the dose of a medication you're currently taking - A listener is breaking a community guideline [https://www.7cups.com/about/communityGuidelines.php] When to Block - You don't want a listener to have the ability to contact you (temporarily or permanently) - Staying in contact with a listener threatens your wellbeing - You feel more comfortable if a listener cannot send you messages - A listener is interferring with you connecting with other listeners (for example, picking up your chat multiple times when you try to get paired with a listener via Noni) Blocking does prevent a listener from sending you 1-1 messages, so if a chat just didn't go great you might consider just sending a review if you are open to trying again with the same listener. If you think preventing private messages is the best option for you though, go ahead and block! While all blocks are reviewed by a team, the team understands that all blocks aren't intended to report a listener, sometimes members just do so for their own personal reasons and these do not have to be shared. Tips for Writing a Report In order for a report to be useful to the team who reviews them, it needs to have enough information to make it clear what inappropriate behaviour was done by the listener. Quoting something specfically they said can be useful at times. Quantifying repeated inappropriate behaviour or your requests can also be helpful. It is not necessary to share details about what the issue you were seeking support for, but you can if you're comfortable doing so. It is also possible to share screenshots via linking to imaging sharing sites or by uploading when using the chat or help center request (see further below for these 2). Here are some examples Not enough detail - The listener was mean Better - The listener called me names Good level of detail - I was called a lazy slob Not enough detail - The listener was too young Good level of detail - This listener is in the wrong age group, they told me they are 16. Not enough detail - This listener didn't care Good level of detail - I was told I just need to get over my issues and other people have it much worse Not enough detail - This listener was a jerk Good level of detail - The listener called me Honey, even after asking them twice to not call me that, they did so 4 more times Not enough detail - The chat was inappropriate Good level of detail - They kept asking me about details from my sex life like when I last had sex, my favourite postion when I was seeking help about school and my grades (or if uncomfortable sharing this detail say about something unrelated to sex) Not enough detail - Useless Good level of detail - My general request was accepted, but I waited for 10 minutes without a response. I sent out another general request and they took it and again there was no response. Not enough detail - Didn't help me Good level of detail - They barely responded to what I told them, they kept telling me about problems they were having. If a listener has blocked you You might be able to block them to report inappropriate behaviour if you do so while the chat screen stays open. Personally though, I have not been very successful with this capability. If you close the 1-1 chat and attempt to go back to it, you will be unable to use the block option to report. See Reporting Outside of 1-1s to see what your options are if you wish to report the listener after you have been blocked. Listeners Initiating Chats Listeners who have met minimum requirements are given the capability of initiating chats with members ie. they can send messages to members without the member sending out a request for a chat or having sent the listener a message first. If you do not want listeners to be able initiate a chat, in your settings, under My Profile, check the box for Chat Requests - Do not allow Listeners to initiate chats. Listeners that you have messaged before will still be able to send you messages, this only affects listeners you have not chatted with before. Removing A Block Report Actions Reporting Outside of 1-1s email *listener name help center request admins flags safety patrol
Jill7Cups profile picture
Conflict resolution: the importance of timing
by Jill7Cups
Last post
October 5th, 2019
...See more Sometimes there is an idea or policy we don't think is feasible or we find upsetting. How we compose our response, and thus how it is interpreted, may determine if our concerns are heard. When we are upset and respond we are more likely to use confusing sentence structur and language, as our emotional state is influencing our thought process. This can be true when participating in a room, in a forum, and in pms. It can happen on volunteer teams, it can happen everywhere. In rooms you can mute the person you find upsetting, or choose to leave it until your emotional state feels good again instead of engaging in conflict. In forums you can choose not to respond, or come back after you've had some time to process and craft an un-heated response. And so on. The next time you are feeling yourself getting upset, take a moment to collect yourself and walk away until you feel calm. See if it helps you resolve the issue to only communicate when you are not triggered or emotionally upset.

🌟 Welcome! 🌟

Here at the Safety & Knowledge sub-community, our focus is on creating a culture of awareness and support. Please join us to learn how to keep yourself safe online!

See below some key aspects of our community;

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🌟Welcome!🌟

As this is our Safety sub-community, these guidelines are extra extra important! 🌟 here they are below;

1. Please be kind to all users. Forum posts/comments that attack or otherwise offend another user will be removed.
2. No offsite contact sharing. This is strictly against site rules.
3. Please stay on topic to the best of your ability!
4. Please keep confidential information to yourself. This means no sharing of usernames, messages in a 1-1 or a group setting, or any details about a member chat. Take any and all issues that you'd like to discuss in more depth to Rebekah.
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