I can't get over my ex after 5 years. What should I do?
251 Answers
Last Updated: 06/14/2022 at 12:35pm
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Jennifer Patterson, LMFT
Art Therapist
Life can be messy. Sometimes you need a little support to make your way through it. I love to help guide people through their challenges & to find the beauty in our messes.
Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
July 30th, 2016 6:51pm
Talk to him about how you're feeling. Go to him and tell him about how you feel. It may help you.
I understand how hard this can be. Understand that moving forward will be benificial for you. Grow!!
Its alright to think about your ex once a while but not getting over them becomes a problem for you and serves as a barrier. It prevents you from moving on and being happy in your relationship or selecting a good person to take his place. 5years is a long time and you need to let go. You owe it to yourself. You need to work hard on making yourself a better person. Once you start that, you would be too busy thinking about yourself and the thought of him fades away slowly. It definitely wouldn't take a day but you would get there
After 5 years you need to find new hobbies and keep yourself busy. Life has a lot of ways of showing you how to deal with the past and showing you a path to the future. Keep walking. Don't look back. Follow the bright light
We have to move on some time in life. Like a widow or widower after losing the life partner we have to move on. Time heals. We can speed up this healing process by occupying our thoughts elsewhere. Taking up hobbies and making new friends will be some moves to be considered.
try to meet diffrent man and see there quality people have diffrent quality and personality so you should change your mind and see diffrent thing
Anonymous
August 29th, 2016 3:37am
People will often say the same thing. Go out with friends, find a hobby to keep you busy. And trust me it does work. When you decide to move on and want to stop being sad you will definitely better when you go out. Do something that will make you feel happy. Don't base your happiness on others but only yourself.
Anonymous
August 31st, 2016 3:30pm
Try going out. Find someone nice! If you're still hungover, it'll only tear you down. Trust me, I've been trying to get over my ex.
Anonymous
September 9th, 2016 3:53pm
Try to stop focusing on the past and focus on what is going in our life right now with you. Often holding onto the past is what prevents us from moving on. The now is what's happening.
Anonymous
September 11th, 2016 7:25am
see therapists, talk with your family, write down your thoughts and try your best to clear your mind.
See other people, start small and work your way back. To a new much satisfying relationship . Most importantly do what makes you happy. After all you can do whatever your heart desires. Your single enjoy it.
Accept that you have feelings. Take time to feel them and then get back to the present situation, which does not include your ex. You don't need to do anything else but #keepgoing
Breaking up with someone you love is hard. Allow yourself to feel what you feel, don't suppress the emotions. Because that pain you feel is a part of healing. And you'll grow from this experience. When you're ready, do things that make you happy.. Spend time with friends and family, do that thing you always wanted to do, learn something new, anything! Love yourself, choose to love yourself more because you are worth it!
Just leave her , Don't bother about her after 5 big years :) . There are so many other people around you .
Delete all memories. Find someone who loves you even more, respect you, take cares of you, and pamper you. Buy a pet to spend time and forget sadness.
Reconnect with them and resolved any unresolved issues so you can have closure. Also focussing your thoughts on other people can help keep your mind off of them.
Try new things, don't keep doing the things you have been. Seek a professional therapist, research new ideas, and get new hobbies. Occupying and challenging your mind is a good way to keep away unhealthy thoughts.
Anonymous
October 5th, 2016 6:26pm
Just try to find out what is the reason why you can't get over her.. What doo you miss today. And than try to change that.
You could try talking to them and see if you guys can at least be friends or stay connected so you don't have to miss him/her
Anonymous
October 27th, 2016 7:00am
Rethink what exactly is preventing you from stepping out of the relationship toy had. Instead of fixating on the person.. Think about what you miss or what you feel upset about.
You should try to meet new people, try to make some friends, try to live your life and learn new things.
Seek out professional help, there are processes each person must go through to get over loss. Therapy specific to your need may be the best solution to move ahead with your life.
Telling yourself it's okay to still have something for them. They were once a big part of your life and it's only natural that you feel something. Some feel hate, some still love and some are in the middle and grow to feel indifferent over time. I think you should tell yourself it's okay to care for them still but don't let the feelings drag you around. Care for them and be happy for them, and then make yourself happy too. The positive focus on your feelings will make you feel better as you don't focus on all the negative about it and you get to have another ray of sunshine to shine on you. You'll move on when you're ready to do so and if you think that is now, then be happy that your ex is somewhere working on finding happiness if they haven't already. And then you deserve to find it too.
Take simple little steps for yourself and your life. Moving on is very hard from someone you loved. But you have to let the good go for the best. So be happy and start over with a new you and new beginning :)
Anonymous
January 26th, 2017 1:37pm
Try to find closure by removing anything you can about the ex, and perhaps even vent in a private "letter" that you'll never send.
Try your best to find something that will distract you like a hobby. Surround yourself with friends.
Anonymous
November 16th, 2017 5:58pm
You should seek professional guidance. Short of that, examine what you would need to find closure. If it's talking with them, and they are willing, pursue that.
Anonymous
November 22nd, 2017 10:05pm
Explore. Get a dating app. If you guys still ain't together, he wasn't worth it in the first place. Start doing something fun to get your mind off things.
Anonymous
December 8th, 2017 11:24am
It's not possible to get over something. The main thing one should concentrate on is the "will power". It is said where is a will, there is a way. So build your will power and you will be able to move on.
I think you should start to try to look for someone, who makes you feel like you’re amazing, and that you can trust.
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