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I can't get over my ex girlfriend or boyfriend after a year. What should I do?

115 Answers
Last Updated: 03/20/2018 at 7:04am
I can't get over my ex girlfriend or boyfriend after a year. What should I do?
1 Tip to Feel Better
Mexico
Moderated by

Paola Giordani, Psychoanalyst

Licensed Psychoanalyst

I have helped and am helping people cope with loss, divorce, anguish and parenting. Depression is also a major issue that comes up.

Top Rated Answers
RibbonOfLight4
May 29th, 2016 9:42pm
I believe there might be two reasons to that. Or you are TOO MUCH into thinking about this person (don't want it to end, not even in your head. You are having a mental relationship). You are breaking yourself constantly and can't engage in other subjects. Or you are avoiding thinking about the subject AT ALL. You are not allowing yourself to go to whole process of grief. You don't allow yourself to be broken. Either, give yourself some time to think about your feelings (like an hour every other day?), and more time doing things you enjoy.
TheLolita
January 28th, 2016 4:44am
Not setting a time limit or expectancy is important when getting over someone. Allowing yourself to heal properly is important and once you heal moving on is the best thing you can do. Becoming active within your community, having a supportive group that surrounds you, becoming the best person you can be is the best thing you can do. I always encourage an individual to start working out, taking a college course, trying a new activity, becoming spiritual, helping others, etc.
Anonymous
February 21st, 2016 11:24am
you should try to concentrate on other important things may be there is a special someone waiting for you
Anonymous
May 15th, 2016 1:59pm
First you need to try to list all the things you hate about him, or try to push him away. This way he feel distant from you, and you will slowly see him less and also you will slowing have no feelings for him.
fantasticButton57
May 22nd, 2016 8:54pm
Speak to someone about it,or atleast text them and be cool,and explain how you feel,maybe they'll understand and help you
Anonymous
June 9th, 2016 10:28pm
Remove everything about her/him, on your phone or maybe in your room, if you haven't done that already. Keep your mind busy, and remember, sometimes i takes way longer to get over a breakup than you think. Good luck! :)
Anonymous
December 4th, 2017 5:11am
Moving on takes time. Maybe a year is not enough for you to forget. Don't worry, you'll get there. Enjoy your life being single. Do what you want and discover new things about yourself.
ConnyK
February 17th, 2016 11:58pm
If you can't get over them, you still have your friends to remind you how much they love you. Social activities spend with friends at hard times like this is definitely ideal. They remind you why they're YOUR friends and you tend to forget at the back of your head that you can't get over someone. All you need to do is smile and laugh and be open to new opportunities. Meet new people, go to a gallery. Keep your mind busy so you won't think too much about it. Eventually, the feeling of holding onto them will go away.
Anonymous
February 24th, 2016 9:53am
Try focusing on key points as to why it didn't work out and what has happened to help you move on and to remind you daily why it never worked out. focus on the troubles and look for the warning signs as to what happened and when the issues started.
TheListenerX
March 19th, 2016 3:51am
You have to get out there and find someone new, someone better! That may sound like something impossible at this moment in time, but itll happen before you know it.
JelayMe
April 7th, 2016 7:50am
Moving on is a difficult process. Some people's journey may be faster or slower but you have to remember that it is not a contest. Take it slow. Take small steps but never stop. No matter how slow you go, just keep moving on. You'll get there.
Anonymous
May 1st, 2016 3:47pm
Understand what's the unfinished business you still think you have with him/her. Sometimes just talking with an ex after so long makes you realize that the right thing to do was leaving them, so that might be all you need a one 5 minute talk to remember the things you dislike about then and get to move on with your plans
Believe89
June 4th, 2016 7:01am
First thing you should do is they rid of everything that reminds you of him/her. Take Classes or activities to keep you busy keeps yoyou mind off of him/her
Lavendel
June 5th, 2016 4:51pm
Remember that your worth is not reflected through them. You are your own person before anyone else's
Anonymous
June 9th, 2016 8:42am
I think you should consult a therapist. You should try distracting your mind for the best results. Also, it's totally up to you, whether to expect to return back, or move on and lead a better life. Decision making is important. Make sure, you do good, and it's for your happiness.
Anonymous
June 24th, 2016 7:32pm
You should get closure. Closure sometimes helps. You should talk to them about it or try dating new people.
charmingOrange11
June 30th, 2016 3:32pm
Maybe you need closure. You could try contacting them if you really wanted because the answers you got may not have been satisfying. Don't worry about it being a year. You must have really cared about them. You heal at your own pace.
Stellis
June 30th, 2016 6:03pm
Losing someone is hard especially those who mean so very much to us. It's important to give yourself time to heal whether that's a week, a month, a year or sometimes longer. Try focusing on positive goals and things that are good in your life instead of negative emotions, but when those negative emotions hit it's important to let yourself feel them and then move on. Instead of focusing on your past, try to look towards the future and what new adventures lie ahead.
RobVL
July 9th, 2016 3:30pm
This is always a hard experience. The first thing you need to start doing is looking after yourself. Focus on mindfulness exercises as these will prevent your mind from running or acing back to thoughts of your ex. Don't get me wrong, it is ok to think back from time to time. But moving on is more important.
SunShineAlwaysGrateful
July 11th, 2017 1:24am
The best thing you can do for yourself is take great care of you! Eat, sleep and exercise! Keep social connections with family and friends go do amazing things ....go on that hike, see an iceberg. See a play, go to the beach...experiences make your life blossom! IF you get stuck set goals and above all live each day fully! Work, live and play with zest! Which of course what you would tell your friend should they ask YOU the same question..always be kind to YOU😜
katejames429
November 13th, 2017 5:15pm
After being in relationship with my husband for nine years,he broke up with me, I did everything possible to bring him back but all was in vain, I wanted him back so much because of the love I have for him, I begged him with everything, I made promises but he refused. I explained my problem to someone online and she suggested that I should rather contact a spell caster that could help me cast a spell to bring him back but I am the type that never believed in spell, I had no choice than to try it, I mailed the spell caster, and he told me there was no problem that everything will be okay before three days, that my ex will return to me before three days, he cast the spell and surprisingly in the second day, it was around 4pm. My ex called me, I was so surprised, I answered the call and all he said was that he was so sorry for everything that happened, that he wanted me to return to him, that he loves me so much. I was so happy and went to him, that was how we started living together happily again. Since then, I have made promise that anybody I know that have a relationship problem, I would be of help to such person by referring him or her to the only real and powerful spell caster who helped me with my own problem and who is different from all the fake ones out there. Anybody could need the help of the spell caster, his email is (LAVENDERLOVESPELL@YAHOO.COM } watssap +2347053977842) you can email him if you need his assistance in your relationship or anything.
moeshawalter
November 15th, 2017 2:41pm
I can't thank you enough for all that you have done for me. About a year ago I my partner split up, we had both made BIG mistakes in our relationship. he ended up moving away from me to pursue a new life. I knew in my heart that he would be the only one to make me happy. I was relieved when I found your email on a site about what you have done. I requested 1 to 2 day casting of the reunite us love spell and within 3 days mark company had relocated him back to our hometown where I still lived. We immediately reconnected and move in with each other. Our wedding date is set for February . Expect to see dr. kpomosa and his temple team all thanks to dr.kpomosatempleofrelief@gmail.com for the relief.you can reach him for help his very reliable. Moesha Walter TX
Anonymous
November 16th, 2017 4:40am
How to get your ex back fast! I was hurt and heart broken when a very big problem occurred in my marriage seven months ago, between me and my husband . so terrible that he took the case to court for a divorce. he said that he never wanted to stay with me again,and that he didn't love me anymore. So he packed out of the house and made me and my children passed through severe pain. I tried all my possible means to get him back,after much begging,but all to no avail.and he confirmed it that he has made his decision,and he never wanted to see me again. So on one evening,as i was coming back from work,i met an old friend of mine who asked of my husband .So i explained every thing to him,so he told me that the only way i can get my husband back,is to visit a spell caster,because it has really worked for him too. So i never believed in spell,but i had no other choice,than to follow his advice. Then he gave me the Email address of the spell caster whom he visited. Pristbacasim2000@gmail.com. So the next morning,i sent a mail to the address he gave to me,and the spell caster assured me that i will get my husband back the next day. What an amazing statement!! I never believed,so he spoke with me, and told me everything that i need to do. Then the next morning, So surprisingly, my husband who didn't call me for the past 7 months, gave me a call to inform me that he was coming back. So Amazing!! So that was how he came back that same day,with lots of love and joy,and he apologized for his mistake,and for the pain he caused me and my children. Then from that day,our relationship was now stronger than how it were before,by the help of a spell caster. So, i will advice you out there if you have any kind of problem, Please i will advice you to contact Pristbacasim, i give you 100% guarantee that he will help you solve your problems.. Email him at: Pristbacasim2000@gmail.com or call him on +2349031655970
generousSpring2101
November 23rd, 2017 8:31am
My boyfriend left me for another girl. I needed him back desperately because i loved him so much. I became very worried and needed help. as i was browsing through the internet, I came across a website that suggested that Dr.Ebuka can help get ex back fast and stop a divorce or breakup and so on , So I felt I should give him a try. I contacted him and he told me what to do and i did it then he did a (return Love spell) for me. 28 hours later, my boyfriend came back to me crying and begging for my forgiveness. Today I'm so happy and i want to recommend this great spell caster to anyone that truly needs an urgent solution to his or her broken relationships and marriage. Simply contact the great "Dr.Ebuka" If you have any problem contact him and i guarantee you that he will help you., Thank you Dr Ebuka for saving my broken relationships and brought my boyfriend back to me!" email him at: ebukalovetemple@gmail.com ,you can also call him or add him on Whats-app: +13103599685
Anonymous
January 13th, 2016 11:29pm
I had the same problem for a while and it takes a while to let go. Eventually I took the chance with someone else and that's how I fully moved on although the thought of him crosses my mind.
Anonymous
January 30th, 2016 6:54am
If you can not get over them you could try to find someone else. There are plenty of fish and the sea and you seem like a nice person
youcangetbetter
February 13th, 2016 5:54am
Keep yourself busy. Missing someone is normal in the process of moving on so, keep it on and keep your mind busy.
SunshineTalkWithTara992
February 20th, 2016 4:27am
That's very tough. I find that picking up new hobies, doing little things that you enjoy for yourself, having a good support center, And going out to meet new friends can ease the pain!
AngelHavens7
February 21st, 2016 3:44pm
That's quite a long time I can understand how frustrating that may be. The best thing you can do is, is start changing your life around get busy, talk to other people, change your habits. Otherwise that person will still linger in your memories.
Chinup221
February 24th, 2016 2:13pm
Meet new people. Open yourself up. I know it's hard but if you ever want to get over your ex then you need to open yourself up. It will eventually happen.