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Why do I get over people so easily?

124 Answers
Last Updated: 12/03/2022 at 2:58pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
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Licensed Professional Counselor

A sex positive, and kink knowledgeable therapist with an open mindset and a clear understanding that we are all different.

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
September 11th, 2019 3:11am
It's possible you just aren't emotionally connecting to them to the level you think you are. I also tend to get over people insanely well and do not understand when people are stuck on a break-up or death for over a week because I simply just do allow myself to get emotionally connected to people to be hurt as such. It is possible you're doing the same thing with the same motive out of subconscious fear of being hurt. It is also possible you simply just get over most things quickly and there is not really a reasoning for it.
Iampandagenie
January 19th, 2019 1:16pm
Because they aren't worth remembering. I do believe this.. If i ever find someone who was so much useful for my growth path, i would never forget him/her. I will pray for him/her everyday and will always remember him/her. They are always in my heart.. and this feeling is so good than to wanting them again and making everyday difficult to live. It's bitter to know but it's true.. we are the one responsible for our own misery. People will leave, forget them who did bad to you, love them who always support you. And love blossoms in separation. Attachment is the enemy of love. About all those who did bad to you, think about it, if they are even worth to be in your mind? You are gonna meet so many like them. Just get over them is the only option to make everything easier. And there's nothing bad in getting over them.
Anonymous
August 8th, 2018 4:32am
You have stronger mindset to get over things beyond your control. It may be useful to do so in order to move forth.
Allears247
July 25th, 2018 10:28am
Maybe you do not allow yourself to become overly attached to people. Or maybe its possible that you don't let people all the way in emotionally so when they are gone from your life it doesn't affect you much.
KristinaJ86
June 7th, 2020 11:29am
Some people emotionally distance or seperate themselves when they feel that a relationship is not working. In cases when the couple try so hard to make things work, one or both parties may have given up - but fear of being alone may prolong a breakup. You may get over people quickly because you have emotionally broken up with the person before a physical breakup has happened. When you do finally seperate, you may also be ready for a new relationship. This in no way is a bad person. It just means that you know what you want in a relationship. It is important to communicate this though so that you remain emotionally connected in a relationship.
funkycherry13
June 27th, 2018 1:12pm
Getting over people easily might mean a few things, you may just be laid back and not ready to commit to a serious relationship, which takes a lot of effort, care and trust to build. Maybe you want to try different things before committing and simply aren't ready yet. Sometimes it means you just haven't found the right person to share a relationship with.
Anonymous
June 13th, 2018 7:36am
because that's how you are. you get over people easily because you're capable of that. it is actually a unique skill to have in life considering getting over people, regardless of the situation is needed in times of life even when there is a crisis going on about how do i get over this friend? or how do i get over my girlfriend that broke up with me. appreciate that but also know it's just how you feel and those are your feelings.
amiablePond7294
July 2nd, 2020 1:31am
Some people may get over people quickly. It is not quite a bad thing, although others may view it as. It varies from person to person. In my personal experience, I also get over people very easily. It does not mean that I did not love them or care for them any less. I'm not sure the true meaning why some get overs other quickly. Maybe you knew subconsciously it was time to move on. Or maybe you processed the entire situation without even realizing it. Nonetheless, it is not a bad thing and I don't think there is a one-sized fits all answer to it.
PositivitySpring68
July 11th, 2020 10:55am
Getting over people can be a tough experience especially if you shared a lot of special moments with a particular person. From a personal experience, I have been able to get over people by accepting that there is a season and a time for everything in my life. The same is with everyone's life. Letting go has come with accepting that people are meant to come and go and that every interaction in my life is meant to teach me a lesson. The duration of some interactions may be longer than others but at the end of the day, once the purpose of a particular person in your life has been completed, they will go. So, I find appreciating and learning from every interaction I have with people helps me let go easily.
dtanushree
July 18th, 2020 3:34am
There can be a lot of reasons for getting over people easily. Some reasons could be: -Some people have the have the ability to cope with difficult situations easily. It is because of their personal experiences in the past or their upbringing. They handle any situation very easily. When they are supposed to get over people, they let them go without getting stuck in the situation. -Some people are like "no strings attached". It is not like they do not have feelings or emotions but they are capable of staying with people without getting attached to them. Attachment is indeed a very painful approach to life and situations. -There's a quote which can be one reason why someone can get over people easily. "When the pain of staying put is greater than our fear of the unknown, we find our wings". I don't know what are your reasons to get ober people easily but it is okay. Staying somewhere where you don't want to be may not be pleasant for you or the person you are with. I feel that getting over people easily is somewhat a good aspect. 💓
Thegirlwhowrites101
March 1st, 2018 2:22am
Some people just get over things faster than others. It does not mean you don't care or that you're weird. It is normal for some.
Anonymous
March 1st, 2018 1:49am
Some people have the ability to let stuff go and not feel guilty. But don't look at it as its being a bad thing
considerateVision16
November 15th, 2017 6:05pm
That's just how you are. Consider that a gift because there are people in this world who take years to get over people.
Anonymous
November 9th, 2017 4:35pm
Because they were never what you really wanted if that person were the one you wouldn't have let them go as easy
Anonymous
September 16th, 2017 3:55pm
It could be that you've learned yourself to block the negativity out of your life a little faster than others, this can be because of events that happened in the past. This definitely isn't a bad trait.
spectacularForest
September 13th, 2017 11:54pm
Because perhaps you dont feel like they have an important role in your life so your mind kinda automatically remove them
ParoxysmsJulie
August 11th, 2017 3:42pm
That's not necessarily a bad thing. It may be just your personality and that's okay. It saves you a lot of unneeded stress and crying at the least!
UntilThen
July 17th, 2017 5:54am
Getting over people easily isn't necessarily a bad thing at all. It may very well be that you are just able to handle those specific type of emotions better than most. If you feel that is comes from some other issue, such as lack of empathy or issues connecting with others, or some sort of mental illness, then try working on that issue and other life changes will come.
peacefulkat
April 9th, 2017 3:24am
It may be because you don't get attached to others as easy, it takes awhile to open up to them and to fully trust them.
Anonymous
January 16th, 2022 3:08pm
Some of the reasons can be that- You know what is good for yourself and prioritize your mental health over longing for someone who probably won't come back. You also may have already sensed their separation from you a long time ago and have prepared yourself for the parting so it doesn't surprise or take a toll on your mental health too much when it finally happens.
BlueOasis420
April 7th, 2021 11:07am
That's not abnormal. People are born with different characteristics. That means, some people are really struggeling with overcoming things and other do not. That doesn't mean you're a sociopath or something, it's just a part of you. Sometimes people with problems overcoming also had a rough childhood where they were left alone, or they just were born like that. Don't worry about it. That's completely acceptable and okay. Maybe you can just enjoy your ability of not feeling grieve as intense as others. It doesn't make you a bad person or mentally ill. It's some kind of gift, too. You can overcome relationships quick and find new ones without old grieve or triggers. Maybe it's not a flaw, but a skill. Maybe there are even people who wish they could be you. So just be happy and okay with it. There's nothing wrong about it and it's just a part of your personality, nothing more. Have a nice day!
omica
July 2nd, 2016 11:57pm
Maybe you haven't found the true "one" yet. It is not a bad thing to let go of people easily because it would bad to hold on to people.
AndrewLupis
March 31st, 2021 6:36pm
Thank you for reaching out! You might want to ask yourself how you feel about getting over people easily. Do you feel good they are out of your life? Do you feel bad they are out of your life? Do you feel a sense of loneliness; a feeling of being incomplete without them? Getting over people has different meanings depending on the situation and circumstance. Getting over someone has a tendency to be applied to intimate relationships, but it could also refer to other situations. An example of another situation would be an acquaintance that you have been hoping to make friends with which seems to be very challenging. Whatever the scenario is, in this particular question you may re-phrase by saying "Why do I not feel like putting any further effort into a relationship with this person?" Thinking of the reasons that you do not want to put any further effort into a relationship or transaction will allow you to determine what steps you have taken to ascertain your position. Perhaps you will notice that you were not too interested in pursuing whatever person you thought you were interested in. Perhaps you feel that you exhausted all reasonable or feasible options in pursuing your interest with another person. Perhaps you find that you prefer not to spend as much time with particular people. Perhaps you feel meeting more people to gain many different experiences is for you! It may be helpful to write notes on a journal or diary about your thoughts in order to gather your ideas and have a better understanding to answer your own question. You know you best. You are welcome to reach out to one of our listeners or online therapists for further support.
Anonymous
March 13th, 2021 4:39am
Generally I know that for me what is important is my life and my goals and dreams. I don't look for that in another person thus if for some reason someone feels like we no longer fit that is ok because I have to keep doing me. I am not saying that I never missed or didn't care about a lost relationship. Yet if someone is on a separate path no amount of force can bring it back. Life is too short to keep worrying about what was there is always so much to come. I am positive that tomorrow will be a better day if I keep trying.
Anonymous
February 28th, 2021 5:18pm
In my teens we moved around a lot, I changed schools once a year for 4 years. I observed people and made friends each time and found that relationships would rarely persist throughout the years. This used to sadden me deeply before I understood the valuable lesson in these experiences. People come and go in our lives and often despite our best efforts to stay connected, move in a different direction. There's incredible freedom, for everyone involved, in enjoying people while they're around without making them feel obligated to stay. The ability to let people go has actually made the right people stay and kept unhealthy relationships at bay
Anonymous
September 5th, 2016 11:53am
Maybe you weren't that into them in the first place..
Anonymous
September 22nd, 2016 1:17pm
Because I do not get too involved emotionally, I try to maintain my distance and avoid getting close to anybody
Anonymous
October 19th, 2016 11:05pm
I get over people easily, because it's easy to forgive and forget over time. We all make mistakes in the end, and when we do, we move on and keep moving forward.
allnaturalUnicorns70
June 24th, 2016 1:29pm
Is it possible that you haven't connected to them in the first place all that much? If so, maybe consider why that might be?
supportiveLove68
March 11th, 2017 7:30am
Because I am a surgeon, so as a defense mechanism in work, I pull back emotionally and eventually it became a part of me