How do I help explain to a parent that what I feel is valid after they reacted badly?

Sometimes parents forget that we are people just the same as they are, and easily overlook our feelings, thoughts and opinions. It's sometimes helpful to remind them that you are at a point that you have developed into your own person, and your ideals and feelings will not always coincide with theirs, but you respect their feelings and would ask that they give you that same respect in return. Mutual respect is usually what I find to be the biggest issue in any relationship, rather it be friends, family or a partner. You must respect one another even if you disagree, to therefore value one another's feelings.

Parents will always think good for their children. But they are also human and can make mistakes. Even though they think what they are thinking is good for the child, they can be wrong. Make the parent understand that their opinion matters to you and will always matter but You should be the one making decisions about your life. Take baby steps. Make them allow you to make small decisions of your life at first. Then gradually make more and more decisions yourself along with consulting your parents. When the parent sees that you can make your own decisions in a good way they will start to give you more autonomy, even when they sometimes disagree with your decision and react badly.

I've been in this situation before, and I know how stressful and nerve-wracking confronting parents can be. You have to be mindful of how your parent could react to what you say. Is it something that could make them angry? Would they be understanding? Think of ways to express what you feel in a way that they understand. Remember that the goal isn't to get them to agree with you; it's to have them validate you. Brainstorm what you say based on seeking validation rather than persuasion, and remember to be completely honest. Validate them too by acknowledging their previous reaction.

Describing a reaction as bad is a relative term. Such a reaction would vary from person to person. Only you would know what the specific reaction of your parent would be. In previous situations where such a reaction was observed, think about what helped to diffuse situation. Is it better to seek another appropriate time? Is my tone respectful? What would be the best choice of words? Am I interrupting when my parent speaks? Do I sound like I am talking back to my parent? How is my body language? Am I rolling my eyes? Am I shrugging? Do I appear closed off, like I'm ignoring what they're saying? Am I being reasonable? Am I willing to hear their side? Think about how you'd like your parent to respond to you and give them the same courtesy. Since your parent is in the position of power, considering the possibility that you may not get your way this time, helps you prepare beforehand on how to react calmly. Communicating maturely in the present will serve you in good stead for future occasions, even when relating to people other than your parent.

Ask if you can have a conversation with them because you have a few concerns and would like to talk to them about them. You have every right to have this conversation. Especially if you are feeling badly or confused. Start by asking if you could have a few minutes of their time because you have a couple of concerns you would like to talk about. If it’s not a good time for them, ask when you can have a few minutes of their time to talk about your concerns. They then have the option of accepting your request or declining to discuss your concerns

Firstly stay calm! Do not fight fire with more fire. Try and figure out how you are currently feeling. Angry? irritated? Devalidated? you need this for the next technique i have learned from a listener a log time ago! when you have calmed down and taken your time to figure out how you are feeling. You can pick up a conversation at a different point when everyone is calm and has the time to listen. And here is where the technique comes in, this being: Talk from how you are feeling. Do not accuse! say things like: the way you reacted to my (fill in conondrum") Made me feel such a such way. But i do feel such and such a way about this conondrum. This made me feel as if how i felt was not valid. With this conversation technique you do not accuse anyone of anything so they will not feel attacked or jugded. most of the time. But it does make it clear in a friendly nonhostile way how you feel. And gets across the point you wanted to make in the first place.

Explain to them how it makes you feel and describe how you’re feeling and how it is affecting your daily life. Explain why you’re feeling that way and that it really is affecting you and that you’re being serious, and what you’re feeling is real. Try to calm them down and tell them you wouldn’t be talking to them if you didn’t think it was that serious, and that you want them to consider your feelings and be validated. Ask them why they reacted like that and try to have a conversation with them about it and try to get along.

I think it is very hard for parents to not react on our situation. When we are young they are used to react to every single cry, always! As we grow older I believe it is hard to step out of the way and acknowledge that we can deal with our situations quite well, or that we can grow into it. Especially when their kids are facing a challenge, it is hard for a parent not to interfere, and this is something one also has to respect. I would explain to a parent that I acknowledge their attempt to act, and that I appreciate that. But, that I need more support, rather than someone else taking over. Therefore it is crucial to feel seen and accepted in the situation that I am in, with all its emotional turmoil.

It's great that you are in touch with your own emotions and understand your thoughts. How do you think you could best express them to this parent? How do you think they will react? I know how hard it can be to talk to someone about their actions and decisions, but do you think talking to this parent will help the situation or resolve your feelings? think of ways you can combat this situation that will be easier for you or won't contribute to your feelings of nervousness. Ask yourself if you are sure about what you're feeling and consider if you think this is something necessary in helping you with your feelings.

It is going to be hard to do it, but you will have to be the bigger man or woman in the situation even if your parent continues to treat you unfairly. It may be easy to fight fire with fire, but that will only create a bigger issue. You have to take initiative, walk up to your parents, ask them if they are available, and open up about how you feel and what you feel. It sounds cliche and generic, but being straightforward is better than beating around the bush and hoping that they understand later. People are a lot more loving and care than society makes them out to be. I wish you the best, and I believe in you!

It can unfortunately be really difficult to convince parents about something they are against or have a negative outlook about. In many cases it might take a lot of time to make them understand. But what you feel is always going to be valid so don't give up and keep trying. Parents will in most cases change their mind with time cause they want to see us happy. But the change can be really really slow so please don't lose patience. Lastly I would like you to know that make sure you are not in a situation where you can get hurt, take care of yourself and if you think they love you? Then be a bit patient and they might come around!

From experinece with speaking to a parent, I know what helped me get a point across when they were not very receptive was supplying an outside parent accepted influence. For instance, if I read about a topic but did not have a strong backaground seeing what a professional said about the topic helped me learn more or provide insight to sources. For instance, if I disagreed about how long an activity should take reading what an expert said would either change my opinion or at least convey to my parents what I had found. I think also being mindful of approaching a subject carefully was also helpful in getting parents to become more receptive in my own experience.

Sometimes have tough talks with our parents can be hard. One of the best ways to create a common ground is "I feel "X", when you "Y" statements. This helps us acknowledge our feelings and bring them to the surface in a non-threatening way. This can open the floor for consideration and discussion. Here is an example: Son: "I feel overwhelmed when you say I need to do more dishes than my little sister." Mom: "I understand how that can seem overwhelming and even a bit unfair. I feel like this is a skill I have already taught you and, as a result you can handle a bit more. Your sister is still learning and we would only have to rewash any dishes she did not do correctly. It would make more work. What would make this easier for you?" This opens the door for communication and resolution in a non-accusatory way.

Once everyone has cooled down, I think you can try to put forth your experience and your point of you in a way that doesn't give the impression that you are blaming them. Once people feel like they are being blamed, they are more likely to become defensive and have a hard time empathizing with you. Try to put it forth as compassionately as possible so that it is easier for them to grasp. You can use "I' statements. For example, instead of saying "You don't care about me or my feelings.” You can say “I feel frustrated when my feelings aren't heard or acknowledged.” This way the focus is on your experience and feelings and less on them. You can also add statements such as "I understand that it may be hard to see where I am coming from but I just want to let you know what my experience is."

From my personal experience, it’s best to give the issue sometime and talk to them at another time. I remembered bring up the topic several times with them immediately reacting badly (not even able to start a conversation), but after sometime (during which I reflected and I believe they did too) we were able to sit down and at least talk rationally about it, with them eventually acknowledging my feelings. I believe that most parents are caring for their children, it’s just hard to alter their preconceptions, etc. If we give them time, bring up the topic calmly, show them that we are thinking maturely (instead of acting childishly), they’d eventually come to understand. Communication is super important but don’t expect every conversation to end in resolution. Parents need time to change.

Relating to this on a personal level after having had this conversation earlier today with a parent, it is pretty hard to discuss things with a stubborn one. They may be very stuck in their ways and don't want to entertain the possibility of being wrong or there being another way alongside their own. Personally, I sought a therapist which could mediate and stand on an equal level with my parent so that instead of my parent having constant control where they could shut the conversation down when it wasn't going the way they wanted - I would get the chance to voice how I felt and what I thought without being constantly told that it didn't matter how I thought or felt. You could try getting a mediator such as a therapist.

This hasn't happened to me, but having a heart to heart conversation with your parents may not work, but may help. Sitting down with a friend that might go through the same thing as you, and sitting down with them and your parents might help too because they can perhaps explain what they're feeling through different words. That's what I did with my friend when she was thinking about getting an ADHD test. Her father wasn't listening and thought she was only being 'insecure'; something she gets scolded a lot for some reason. Anyway, when I had a sit down with him and my friend, I explained that ADHD isn't only hyperactivity and attention problems. He understood much better. :)))

Relationships with parents are difficult however your feelings are one hundred percent yours and nobody can take that away from you. Since they reacted poorly remember that you can disagree on opinions but you cannot disagree on your emotions since they are yours. It also may be helpful to keep repeating that they are valid so that you remember why you need to explain it to them so that if there is a next time you are ready for another explanation. You are not at fault for what someone else does. Also, don't forget to take your time when explaining the situation to them and do some calming exercises before so you are not too anxious.

While this may be difficult to hear, we can never force anyone to accept anything. Even if we use violence or abuse to coerce them into believing what we want, in their hearts they may still hold their previous belief. Ultimately, the only person who can validate your beliefs...is you! However, it is very painful when we are not acknowledged or accepted. The first step is letting the other person know how you felt and why, without being accusatory. If we are accusatory, they may just shut down and no longer want to hear what we have to say. When open communication is an option, we should always strive to connect with others.

I think this might happen because of the cognitive gap. Cognitive gap is a thing that you feel different from others, such as your parents. However, I believe that everyone will probably have different perspectives, and it is normal to have different opinion towards one thing. Parents might more mature than you, but if you really feel valid, you can explain your own views and demonstrate that your opinion is reasonable. And you can politely suggest to your parents to let them try to think differently towards this issue, maybe they will feel better even though they feel badly at the first time.

This is a very delicate situation. I think you should first wait for them to calm down then maybe over a cup of tea bring up the issue at hand. However, when sharing your opinion be sure to avoid from saying something along the lines of "you are wrong, you don't understand"- while this might be the case its likely to anger them. Just try and be mature and respectful when approaching them. I might recommend making it clear when you approach them that you do not mean to offend in any way. Don't raise your voice and avoid pointing fingers. Now if they still don't listen, don't get angry. Your feelings are valid even if they may not understand.

I would give it some time to make sure that everyone is calm about the situation & then ask them to talk about it. explain the situation from your side, how they reacted, why it made you feel the way it did & what you would want them to do differently. then they can share their side too and explain what they would like you to do differently or why they acted the way that they did. that way it helps both sides understand each other and know what they can work on and change to avoid this happening again

Setting boundaries with parents can be very difficult, but it is important to remind them that you are your own person that has feelings and thoughts as well. Try sitting them down to calmly let them know that there reaction hurt you. Try not to be accusatory or bring up past problems. Tell them that you are explaining your feelings as a way to grow in your relationship with them, not as a way to disrespect their authority as a parent. Explain how their reactions specifically hurt you and why they hurt. Trying to keep it respectful, calm, and making it clear it is a discussion may help avoid further bad reactions.

Explain to them that their reactions were not what you expected and explain to them that your feelings are valid because you are experiencing something. If needed, you can educate them on your issue because a bad reaction can come from lack of education. Educating and informing can do wonders for a parent's reaction. You can also explain how their reaction made you feel by saying their reaction wasn't what you were expecting or hoping. Hopefully, your parent will become more understanding and will want to help you in the future so this does not happen again. Hope this helps.

This is really difficult and many people struggle with this, including me! I think it's important to wait until everyone has calmed down before attempting to discuss it again because, in my experience, people tend to be irrational during a bad reaction, or for a while after. It seems easier to talk to them at a later date and explain exactly how you felt in that moment. Perhaps, if it's a more urgent situation, you could put then in your shoes by explaning a scenario they may understand in order for them to know how you're feeling first hand. Maybe that could help them to see how your feelings are valid without them being confused about your emotions

Firstly try to listen to them attentively if they reacted badly in a way that affected you emotionally you could wait till when they are in a much better mood bring up a joke and then amidst that you could tell them" but hey mom haha this is what you said I might feel reluctant telling you anything else cos you will be mad at me and they could either apologize or laughingly feel bad. Thing is parents mindset are wired to think they are always correct and know what best for their kids absolutely and so on

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This can be a problem of generation gap. It is very important to express yourself in a way which is not hurtful for them too. So try to be patient with them and also explain yourself in a way that doesn't hurt them too. Try to understand where they are coming from and then work your way around at changing that point. Statements like : -The other day we had an argument about this thing. - I haven't been able to stop thinking about it. -It hurt me really bad that you couldn't understand me. -I would appreciate if you could try to give a chance at understanding me.

Getting them to a place where they can listen is the first step. No one can fully pay attention in the heat of the moment. So, I would start by letting them know that I understand why they might have reacted in such a way, while using a calm, warm tone. Parents can get overprotective because in most cases they want what is best for their child. As soon as the tension is somewhat relieved, I would reassure them that my intensions were not to defy or undermine them but that it would benefit both parties if they understand my view of the situation and do my best to give clear arguments. This might not apply to every situation, but being calm and respectful is a great start when trying to discuss something sensitive with parents.

My mom and I love each other very much. I’m grateful for her every day. But every once and a while me and my mom diss agree on something and yell at one another. I end up feeling awful and guilty for yelling at my mom and apologize to her almost immediately afterwards. But recently I’ve discovered that that is not quite the way to go around the issue. Recently, I’ve made a point of talking about the issue after we’ve both calmed down. Sometimes it ends quickly, other times we both have to leave the room again in order to not have to start all over again. I’ve learned through this experience that my feelings are valid and I shouldn’t feel guilty for sharing how I’m feeling.