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How can I stop thinking about my ex?

188 Answers
Last Updated: 04/30/2020 at 8:36pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Alison Humphreys, LCPC

Licensed Professional Counselor

During the therapeutic process, individuals will learn to manage transitions, overcome obstacles and work towards their full potential .

Top Rated Answers
HopefulJet61
November 9th, 2015 2:13am
Try picking up different activities and hobbies best way hands down! Why? You will be distracted, moving on, and enjoying yourself in the process!:)
Teddyzxc123
November 23rd, 2015 4:12am
you can stop thinking about your ex by doing alot of other productive stuffs like going out with your close friends, watching your favourite movies / TV shows, reading your favourite books, listening to your favourite artiste, sleeping, cycling, play your favourite games, eat, chill. there's so many things you can do! but i have to say this, it wont be easy to just stop thinking about your ex straightaway. it takes time, but it'll be worth the amount of time taken just to stop. show him/her that you're better without him/her! :)
CreamyHearts
November 30th, 2015 8:22pm
I recommend spending your time with your family and friends. Keep yourself occupied and avoid doing things that reminds you of him :)
Anonymous
February 23rd, 2016 11:26pm
Your best option is to stay busy. Whether its through school, friends or work, I've always found staying busy to be the best remedy.
Anonymous
May 30th, 2016 5:14am
Reading, spending time w/friends, exercising. You can join a club/s, learn new languages, watch T.V.
KindWinter183
August 8th, 2016 9:29am
I think you need to find activities that keep your mind distracted from the ex, and when there is a thought of your ex, be conscious about it, feel the feeling and acknowledge the emotion, and let the thought pass like clouds. This is a form of meditation i learnt.
PuppyLove13
September 18th, 2016 7:52pm
Engross yourself thoroughly in an activity or hobby of your choice.. I love cooking so I spent hours searching for different recipes and trying different techniques.. I kept myself occupied by multi-tasking.. Helped a lot :)
lacedaniellehelp17
September 23rd, 2016 12:26am
Keep yourself very busy doing things you love. You will think about them less and less. Until you just stop all together.
Smythical
September 23rd, 2016 3:35am
Whenever we breakup it takes a certain amount of time to break-free from that relationship. Letting go can be very hard to do, and it does indeed take time. You should always focus on yourself, and be thankful for all the good times that contributed to the relationship, never be sad, be positive!
Anonymous
September 23rd, 2016 5:02pm
The way you can stop thinking about an ex is the same way you can stop thinking about anything. Unfortunately it takes effort if it's not happening naturally. Replacing with thoughts such as reasons why you'd benefit from stopping thinking about them can help. Also reminding yourself that time may help.
Arlee
September 24th, 2016 4:19am
Keep your mind occupied, Keep your schedule full. Another suggestion is listening to music, write or long walks.
Anonymous
September 29th, 2016 5:50pm
What you resist, persists. Based on my personal experience, allow the thoughts to come and go. Don't try not to think, it will only make you think harder, Send them love and go about your life.
Anonymous
September 30th, 2016 2:30am
Go out and enjoy the world. Live in the moment and be yourself. Don't let your ex hold you back. You have to remember what life was like before your ex. Start doing things that you used to do before him/her.
softUnicorns54
October 4th, 2016 1:32pm
Do something that you like to do like a hobbie, go on a trip, ask why you broke up, and turn it in a good way.
7thguyfromearth
October 5th, 2016 4:45am
Try fishing, knitting, crocheting, cross-stitching, play sports, learn to cook a new recipe , learn how to drive, go on a trip, meet new people, work hard on your studies/work. The list goes on...
intern
October 15th, 2016 4:03am
Move on in life find someone or keep busy so you won't think of them and miss then that much I know it's hard
QueenPassion
October 23rd, 2016 7:15am
Moving on to someone else. If u can't then try being happy with yourself. Keeping your mind active a by maybe reading or simply hanging with friends might help
Anonymous
October 27th, 2016 2:30pm
My previous boyfriend was my first and only boyfriend. I was excited and nervous to know what it was like to be in a relationship. We were an on and off couple every now and then. When we broke up my mind wasn't attached to my heart. My heart didn't miss him but my mind did. Weeks passed and it finally hit me. I missed him and all I could think was him and how we used to be. I had to learn to get out of the mind set of missing. I used that time by learning how to draw better and be a better person for my own sake. Be stronger for my own sense. Every now and then I catch myself thinking about us. I don't regret those moments with him. They are memories for me to cherish.
GayGuyListens2975
October 29th, 2016 4:44am
You need closure. Find out why you broke up. After that just try to be happy with yourself. It's very hard to do but you have to find someone or something that makes you happier.
hopeful789
November 4th, 2016 8:37pm
Try spending time with friends. Having fun and enjoying yourself can often help with taking your mind off things.
compassionateHeart32
November 13th, 2016 12:41am
Thinking about ex's is a time monster. One of the best ways to not think so much about past memories and how painful it is to not be with that person anymore, is to take on a new hobby or volunteer position doing something that you truly enjoy and maybe have always wanted to try but never got the chance. It will open up new doors and expose you to new people. Stirring things up a little and helping others is a great way to not think so much! Horseback riding, archery, joining a choir, helping in a soup kitchen or food bank, adopting a dog or volunteering at an animal shelter- whatever makes you feel good and puts a smile on your face :)
cherishedDreamer25
December 1st, 2016 5:27am
Tell someone close about your ex. The sweet memories, the sad times, the reasons why you broke up, how you feel about your relationship and more. Just basically tell him/her everything about your ex. As vividly as possible, to get it out of your head. Next, keep away all of the stuff that reminds you of your ex. Be it the pictures on the wall or the sweet gifts from him/her. Keep them all away. You can choose to put it in a box and place it in the store room or just simply throw them all away. If the couch or bed reminds you of your ex, try to buy a new cover for it. Replace the bed covers and buy little pillows for your couch, just make it look different. Lastly, don't allow yourself to have the time to think of your ex! Busy yourself with things. Be it sports, reading, hanging out with your friends or even watching drama. Just do anything to distract yourself! And when time passes, you'll soon forget about your ex.
Anonymous
December 1st, 2016 7:29am
You can start off with living in the present rather than the past bud, this happened to me a few times and it messed me up bad I almost dropped out of school over one person! I know it sucks now but think now that you're one step closer to the one.
Alicat711
December 10th, 2016 3:14pm
This is something that I have struggled with personally and I know how tough it is. Honestly, it just takes time. I know that's not the answer anyone wants to hear but the thoughts really do go away over time. My ex broke up with me over a year ago and to this day I still will have occasional thoughts about him, but I no longer think about him everyday or all the time. It can also help to find a hobby you enjoy, or a fun way to occupy your time. Exercise, join a club or a class, do some art, set goals for your future. Find something that makes you happy and focus your thoughts and energy on something positive. Spending time with friends or family can take your mind off of him too.
Anonymous
December 17th, 2016 5:44pm
Now this can be really difficult as generally we hold alot of feelings towards the people we enter relationships with. Self care can be really important like keeping yourself busy, and taking up a hobby in the begining. Over time these feelings may subside and be less. If this.has been happing for a while then it may be worth talking to a listener or therapist for support in overcoming these feelings.
HeartofaPhoenix
December 30th, 2016 7:28am
Find things you enjoy to occupy your time. Start a new hobby that doesn't have a connection to your ex.
AspiringTherapist22
January 5th, 2017 1:06am
The best medicine is your friends company. When you are busy talking and having fun with friends you'll forget about your ex in the moment. You will be talking about other things, thinking about other things. Keep doing this and you will realize that the world has much more to offer.
PinkKitty101
January 29th, 2017 9:14pm
Occupy your mind with different things! Focus on things that make you happy, weather it be watching movies, hitting the gym! Take this time to put yourself first and figure out what you want from your life and focus on learning to love yourself!
Hikushi
February 1st, 2017 4:00am
Allow yourself to dwell on it, then move on to something more interesting. Pick up a new hobby, work on yourself and meet a lot of new people. The more interesting things going on your life, the less you'll think about your ex because they'll be boring/irrelevant in comparison. Create a life that is better than a life with your ex in it and that will help you move on.
compassionateWaterfall99
February 2nd, 2017 5:32pm
Personally, it took me a long time to get over my ex but i found that going out with friends was the way froward; you know they care and you can rely on them so spending time with them takes your attention away from the past.