How do I tell my boyfriend that I don't want to be with him? (anymore)
Last Updated: 12/28/2020 at 5:05am
Melissa Hudson, MS Ed, PhD(c), LMFT
Marriage & Family Therapist
I work with clients of diverse backgrounds on a multitude of concerns. My approach is, at times, directive, yet always curious, nonjudgmental, collaborative, and validating.
Top Rated Answers
Tell him you don't think you two are a good match for each other. There are other people out there who will be even better for him than you are, and you hope that he finds that person.
I had this problem - it was the hardest thing I have ever had to do as I cared about him so so much but unfortunately the love had just gone. I had put it off for 3 months. I finally sat him down and just told him how i felt and explained how staying with him wasn't fair on him as he needed someone who truly loved him, and it wasn't fair for me to give someone false love. It's hard but you'll both be happier for it in the long run. Hope this helped x
I have been dating this guy for about 3 months I moved way to fast at first and have gotten in to deep .. the love of my life comes back in to my life and I don’t wanna pass up this chance how do I break up with my current boyfriend without hurting him ? He thinks we are life long partners
If he has been with you for years you may wanna take the process slow however if he has been with you weeks then just let him down but do it easy remember us guys have hearts to
Be honest when you can, as soon as possible. It's better to end the relationship before things get too serious. Have a face to face conversation and tell him how you feel. You don't have to say everything but, be attentive and understanding to you're needs first and then his.
This is always difficult to get around, but probably easiest to address how you are feeling towards the relationship but let him down gently. Say you still respect him and like him as a person but you need to be on your own. The worst part will be getting round to doing it in the first place so best of luck- put yourself first x
Sit him down and tell him how you feel!!!!!and why you want to break up with him!!!!!!
Try to be gentle. Thank him for this beautiful time you spent with him, and for all the happiness. Don't say „let's be friends“ because people usually hate this sentence after a break up.
First of all, think everything through. Be sure you really don't have d=feelings for him at all and he became a stranger to you. The thing is - break ups may be tough for both lovers and you do not want to suffer from your decision. Find a day when he is not down and explain everything that you have. You should know that everyone left behind always have lots of unanswered questions afterwards, so make sure he understood your choice. If needed, try be supportive after break up and don't be afraid to ask him how is he doing. Remember that he is a living person with feelings and memories.
I'm sorry. I apologize now for what I'm going to say. I don't want to be with you anymore. I just don't feel ok being with you anymore.
You have to speak to him and be clear about it. Be natural, give him valid reasons and why you're no longer ready to spend time with him. Tell him how you exactly feel and make him understand that there is no future that's why it is better to tell the truth rather than cheating with a lie or trying to stay there feeling nothing for him.
I think the best way is to be gentle, sit him down, tell him what you feel is wrong in the relationship and why you can't be with him anymore. Expect him to be angry and mad but don't be defensive about it, since if he truly loves you, he would feel abandoned and hurt. Give him space and time, and maybe in the future there is a possibility of a friendship, you never know. Good luck with everything and I wish you a happy life
Tell Him Directly..sometimes it's Good to face the situation Directly, i knoe its Difficult..But its For the betterment of you both..:) Stay Blessed..:)
If it’s a relationship that has been going on for awhile.Firstly you need to establish your reason to end the relationship, and if you’ve lost feelings or just plain don’t want a relationship don’t make anything up. Tell them the exact truth, so they can move in easier. Once you’ve done that I would advise using some sort of notepad or notes app to prewrite what you’re gonna say so you can edit and choose what you’re gonna say before you say it, that way you make less mistakes. After you’ve explained the reason of breakup in the pre-write tell him you can’t do it anymore and it’s probably best for y’all to split up. However if it’s a shorter relationship or a less serious relationship just let them down easy and tell them it’s not working out. I wish you the best of luck ❤️
Break ups can be very difficult. Telling the truth may hurt, but at least you'll know you were honest and that you won't feel guilt eat you slowly from the inside. Just make sure that they won't do anything stupid after said breakup.
I was going to advise you to use Chris Brown's song. "Firstly, I want to start this off by saying that I love you and this thing aint been a walk in park for us. Listen to your heart baby. You know we should be apart. There's never a right time to say goodbye,but we know we've got to go our separate ways. I really don't feel the way I once felt about you. Boy it's not you it's me . I've kind of ,got to figure out what I need. " OR tell him that you want to break up with him for x,y,z. Tell him which direction you want your relationship to go in.
There is no magic way of doing this without hurting him. There just isn't it. You have to be gentle but honest with him. Tell him you just don't feel the same way about him that he does about you, and that the relationship is over. If he is as lovely as you say he isn't going to hate you. He might feel hurt, abandoned and angry at first and it's important that you leave him be and don't try to make him feel better by giving him any false hope. In the end, hopefully he will realise that you did the right thing and did so out of respect for him, because you did not want to string him along. But you can't make him see this straight away. Tell him. Let him grieve. Keep a respectful distance. Whether there is a friendship possibility in the future is really his decision.
Be honest with him and just sit him down and tell him. Also prepare to also tell him why you want the breakup and what made u do it. Cause this are the answers that he would want to know.
I think the best way is to take out any blame if there is any, and make it about you needing something else. Be gentle, and calm and explain what you need.
Its never easy to break up with someone as we don't want to hurt their feelings. Being honest with him is always the best way! Plan what you will choose to say as well as what response he may have that you don't want to deal with. For instance, he could become angry, in denial, or attempt to bargain with you. Be very clear with your reasoning and avoid confrontation as much as possible. You can say things like "I'm sorry you feel that way but..." or "I see you are hurt..." Either way, be prepared, honest and stick to your belief of what is best for you (and him).
I will begin to say that there is no easy way to do this. Your boyfriend will be hurt and that will affect you. On the other hand - be honest with him, tell him that your feelings have changed and you don't want to be with him anymore. You are doing this out of respect for the both of you.
Be honest about your feelings with him. Show sympathy and explain your reasoning behind your decision.
Dont sugar code anything, just say it straight up. Being honest is so much more rewarding, then being nice and not getting to the point, if you feel that way, just say it to him. I mean, if you dont have any feelings for him and still is in a relationship with him, you are lying to yourself and to him and it is better to tell honest truth, then a sweet lie.
You let him know, you be honest and you just communicate it with him. If you are not happy anymore or you don't want him anymore, you need to let him know because you matter too.
You should just ask him about something that happened/tell him. It's not bad to tell them how your feeling.
I think when you are in a committed relationship you need to be honest with one another and if you are genuinely not happy and do not want to be with your partner anymore break it to them in the nicest way possible you can sit them down talk about it with them gently, explain your reasons for doing so, your not a bad person for doing this, Many people break up for different reasons , imagine it was your partner wanting to break up with you would you prefer it if they was honest an told you or kept on being in a relationship with you ?
Be very straight forward. Honesty is always key in a relationship even when ending it.
Just do it. That's the best advice I can give. Just do it, and (as long as you're sure breaking up with him is the right choice) do it sooner rather than later. It will be hard; it will be messy; it'll be heartbreaking for the both of you. But the sooner you tell him, the sooner you both can begin to heal and eventually move on.
First think about what you have decided clearly, if you still want to go ahead with breaking up then calm down talk to him and tell him that things are not working out how you thought it would be and tell him you would love to keep in touch even after the separation.
Okay, first, you need to think about it if you really want to end your relationship with him, second, if you already thought about it, and your answer is "yes, I don't want to be with him anymore!" then it's time to talk to him personally and tell him what you are feeling. He will be very confused but don't worry, you have reasons! So tell him your reasons and talk, after you talk, you can walkout. Don't be angry with him even if he reacts madly. :)
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