Why do I feel so alone in my relationship?
Last Updated: 04/13/2022 at 6:26am
Hannah Caradonna, MSW, RCSW (RCC #11330)
I offer a warm and non-judgmental space for you to work through your problems. I can help you with anxiety, disordered eating, depression, relationship problems and more.
Top Rated Answers
When we get into a relationship, we do it because we have some needs that we feel need fulfilment. If you're feeling "alone" in it, it is usually because some of your needs aren't being fulfilled as well as they should. Maybe you should try to talk to them about how you're feeling? That's the kernel of a real relationship...
Sometimes you might feel alone because of certain doubts. Or feelings of insecurity may make you question about your relationship and you are afraid to talk about it. Your partner cannot read minds and does not know or understand what you're going through. Because of this, you feel alone. Try talking with your partner and together, you'll find a way to get through this phase.
That's something that you shouldn't feel and need to bring up to your partner. Tell them straight forward, "Hey, I feel alone in this relationship."
A relationship is between two people. If you are feeling alone, also known as disconnection, from your partner, there is lack of communication. Communicate with your partner in regards to how you feel and why you may be feeling that way.
It happens sometimes. Be frank with your partner. Let him/her know what you feel. Unless you let them know they won't know.
Because when I felt that they weren’t giving into it so all you haft to do is tell them your problems and hopefully they will understand and give more.
It could be many factors as to why you may feel isolated despite having a significant other. Chances are, you and the person may not be compatabile at all and thus, can not seek validation from one another on a deeper level as you simply do not click.
Maybe this person is not providing you with something that you need. Maybe theres a chance you could be depressed.
It sounds like your partner might not be pulling their weight in the emotional compartment of your relationship. They might not take care of your needs, even if you vocalize them, fail to communicate, or not spend enough time and effort on you. Try reaching out to your partner to explain your feelings clearly. If that bears no fruit, it is perfectly healthy and legitimate to take a break from your partner. An intimate relationship should make you feel warm, loved, comforted; if you never feel like that in yours, don't feel guilty about ending it.
Feeling alone in your relationship could mean a number of things. It could mean that your partner is not giving you the attention or time that you want, that you don't connect with them well on an emotional level, or many other reasons. Talking about it with your partner could be a great start, because they may be willing to change things to help how you are feeling, but sometimes feeling lonely in a relationship could be the first sign that you aren't in a relationship that suits what you need or want, and that you may be ready to move on
This may be a lack of communication between you and your partner. I know sometimes I feel alone in my relationship because I'm not getting the type of attention I want or need at the time. I find it is best to talk to my partner about how I am feeling and what I need at the time. This really strengthens our relationship and helps us to be more in tune to each others needs. That being said, it may turn out that your partner can't give you what you need and that is okay! Just know that communication is key.
When I had this weird unofficial-kinda-official relationship (yeah, it was really weird) with this girl when we were in high school, I felt the same similarly. She had tons of friends and also other girls who liked her. When she'd spend time with me and we'd hang out, I'd feel inadequate. That could be one reason why you may feel alone. Do you think it's the feeling of not being enough? Not "matching up" to your partner? Or deserving? But maybe in your case it's not a matter of matching up -- but perhaps feeling like being unheard in the relationship. Not having your space held as much as your partners. Do you think it's more on this imbalance? In that case, is your partner open to talking about this? Sometimes our partners really are oblivious -- or they sense something is wrong but feel awkward or don't know how to approach this. I used to resent this girl because she couldn't seem to read my mind and I felt tired of being so empathetic and understanding hers. This created an imbalance and loneliness in my part. Conversation opens up doors. I hope you get the answers you seek.
I would ask myself what would not feeling alone in this relationship would be like? And, who in this relationship is creating the distance, me or them? Lastly, how often do you reach out to your partner in times of vulnerability? Feeling alone in a relationship can be slightly a complex thing. The sensation of loneliness comes from within ourselves and is based on conscious or subconscious perceptions about what we are experiencing. What we need to figure out is what is it about the external experience is fitting so perfectly with that "lonely" worry we have within us.
You may feel alone in the relationship because the other person isn’t putting in as much effort as you or showing as much love as you. That’s a hard thing to get through, maybe try telling the person about how you feel alone or how you like they aren’t tying as hard as you to keep the relationship going and you want them to try a little harder, if that doesn’t work, maybe the relationship isn’t for you. Your deserve someone who will put in just as much time and effort into a relationship that you do. Remember that always.
Your partner may not be very understanding or provide the support that you may need. They may not be right for you. In a relationship, both parties needs are equally met. It is a lot like a balance with how each person shares their support, time and energy. It will not always be sunshine and rainbows but you will find a peace in having that balance. So they may not be the one for you or you need to take a look at how you are each spending your time and energy. It can be very individualized among different relationships.
From my own experience, usually when you feel this way, it's just because you really are. I know that sounds really sad, but sometimes it's actually a blessing in disguise. It's like someone just pouring cold water over your head and reminding you that maybe you're not in the best relationship. Maybe you've fallen out of love, if you get what I'm saying. Love isn't always eternal, and the worst thing ever is a relationship where you're forcing yourself to love someone who you honestly are beginning not to love. But the second that you ditch that relationship, you'll feel a lot more free-- I promise. And you'll find someone, eventually.
I understand exactly what you’re going through. Here’s what I have found through my personal experience, and I hope it helps. Sometimes in a relationship the very reason we enter one is to feel loved and not alone, but that isn’t an immediate solution. Loneliness is often something we put onto ourselves, we block ourselves off emotionally from many people and say we are alone, when really if we just let our walls down we would see an ocean of people that are there for us. So often in life we enflict loneliness on ourselves because we don’t feel like we are able to be open. So even in a relationship we can feel very alone when all we need to do is knock down our walls. Which by no means is a simple task.
I think that is because you are not receiving the amount if love and attention you want to receive, it may help to first figure out what you feel is missing, maybe you don't cuddle as much as you use to in the beginning if the relationship, maybe you don't talk as much and maybe you make all the decisions in the relationship and maybe you don't, either way figuring out what is missing and what you want can help then once you have a clear idea what what it is, talking to your partner about it is the next step, having a nice talk expressing how you feel and trying to figure out a way to fix the issue is the best way to go about.. Or so I like to think
There are many reasons why you can feel alone in a relationship. From my experience a relationship is about controlling a balance. When you become attached to someone your world can become smaller, friends become more distant and you invest your time in one person and relying on one person for your sole happiness but one person cannot fulfill all your needs. There is still the person who was once young and capable inside who stills wishes and dreams for more. Remember who you were, rekindle friendships or make new ones, connect with them and family regularly. Include your partner but both have your own friendship circles. This will give you more to talk about with your partner or if you are feeling like you’re not quite as connected, respark the relationship. Find an activity you can do together, experience and laugh with each other. Being trapped in isolated thoughts causes doubts and makes you more distant from your partner. This is my experience anyway.
Often relationships can become one sided after a while. Maybe that is why you're feeling this way. Maybe your partner is not providing you the emotional or physical or sexual support that you need from your relationship. When this happens a part of you starts feeling empty. You might've tried talking to your partner and it might've not gone as expected that could've only made things worse. Try talking to your partner about it. If not consider counselling. This must also be because of the insecurities you're experiencing (if you're experiencing any) which may make you feel more in your head and less able to relate to others and eventually make you feel alone. Try talking to someone about it. Hope it works out for you ✌️
There could be many reasons for feeling alone despite having a partner. One of those reasons could be the lack of communication and therefore emotional connection as well. Perhaps you or your partner have stopped sharing things with one another, have stopped talking about your feelings and your relationship, which made you feel disconnected. Perhaps you changed, or your partner has, and you just want different things in life, or have different views on certain issues. This can often make one feel like they lack emotional support from their partner, which doesn’t have to be the case. Communicate your emotions to your partner and let them express their own feelings.
Relationships can be hard work, and sometimes it feels like the tough times will never end. If you are feeling alone in your relationship it is helpful to establish why. It could be that work hours mean not much time is spent together, it could be wildly different interests or it could be that somebody is struggling to put in the effort that goes into most relationships. A relationship requires work from both parties, figuring out what your partner enjoys and what their love language is can go a long way. Communication is equally important, if you are in a safe and loving partnership it is unhealthy to bottle up your feelings. If it is an issue of incompatibility, there is no shame in breaking up and moving on. Relationships shouldn't be a chore, and they should be draining.
Often, after being together for a while, people can feel like they’re alone. This tends to be caused by a work driven partner, or perhaps a partner with a hobby that they are constantly doing. Think about what it is that is making you feel alone, and speak with your partner, in a calm, mature manner. We can all feel a little alone sometimes, even if you’re surrounded by people all the time. The most important thing is not to worry, and know that there are always people available to listen to you and guide you to help you feel yourself again.
Maybe your partner isn’t giving you the love and appreciation you deserve. You should sit down with your partner and be honest about your feelings. If they truly love you they will be willing to change and you can work something out. If not, then it might be time to find someone else who wants to grow with you and start a healthy relationship. One sided relationships can be very emotionally draining for both you and your partner, and is just not healthy. It’s hard to leave someone you love, but if they’re not willing to grow with you then it’s time.
If you feel like you’re the one who’s doing all the work and putting the effort while your significant other isn’t then you should either confront your partner about it and tell him/her how you feel alone and how you’re feel like the relationship relies on you basically. And if your significant other doesn’t change his/her habits then you should probably end the relationship. a relationship is about you two both putting the same amount of high effort and you two working together in order to solve your problems. That’s my recommendation and I hope all goes well with you 🖤
Because you know your self worth and what you are deserving of. When you know what you deserve it is expected that you will want to feel loved and cherished in your relationship. If you’re in a relationship that isn’t open with communication it leaves a lot of feelings unsaid and mats unturned. The key to making any relationship work is to have an open line of communication, even if it’s to ask how was your day? How are you feeling? Can impact greatness in any relationship. The moment we start feeling alone it helps to immediately talk about it.
It is important to communicate with the other person about how you feel and work together to come up with a way of spending more time together and also coming up with a plan to put in the effort in the relationship. However, I also feel that learning to enjoy your own accompany is a blessing. You will discover who you are and it helps you have a good relationship with yourself which is the most important relationship. Self love is very important and sometimes when you embrace loneliness by learning to have fun with yourself, magic happens. So make sure you enjoy the time you spend on yourself.
Well. I guess it would all depend on what your significant other does to make you feel alone. Sometimes, it could be because he is ignoring you, neglecting your feeling and opinions.. or because you feel like you are putting in all the work. In my past, I felt alone with an ex. He was a great guy, but not a fantastic boyfriend. He'd often run off and hang out with his buddies, and left me alone. I often kept the relationship afloat while he didn't see anything wrong. We were 2 different people and we gave it our best shot. I hope all gets better with you two though!
There could be many reasons for feeling alone. It's a legitimate feeling that there's no reason to be ashamed of. I think that some people who feel alone in their relationship are lonely also without it. Unfortunately relationships cannot solve all of our problems, and they also don't have to. People aren't there to satisfy our desires our to heal our wounds; that we must do ourselves (of course we can use their help). It is important to understand where those feelings come from, because they may just as well stem from us and not only from our SO's behaviour (although that possibility isn't necessarily excluded). Once we better understand ourselves we can think of a good way out, each individual with his unique solutions.
You may not be getting the kind of support, love and care you need in your relationship. It doesn't have to mean that your partner is a bad person, but that perhaps you are mismatched. You should certainly try to communicate your feelings to your partner, both of you could come together to figure it out. If talking doesn't help then maybe the relationship isn't worth maintaining. Self care should always come first, you need to ask for and receive what you need in a relationship and give back just as fervently. If you feel unheard and uncared for it's better to find a partner who is worth your time and effort
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