Am I allowed to start being upset and getting help for emotional abuse 3 years after it happened?

100 Answers
Last Updated: 06/02/2019 at 12:10am
Am I allowed to start being upset and getting help for emotional abuse 3 years after it happened?
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Christine Tronge, LCSW

Clinical Social Work/Therapist

I help those with depression, anxiety, and phobias develop coping skills to improve their lives and lessen their suffering, if not eliminate it.!!

Top Rated Answers
GrayFelia
April 8th, 2018 9:56am
Yes. You are absolutely allowed to. It may have been a long time since it happened but it doesn't mean it'll stop affecting you emotionally and physically. Time is a healer, for sure. But not without efforts. Please try to get some help to overcome this, you don't have to be alone. Love. xX
bubblingGrace29
April 22nd, 2018 1:11am
Absolutely. Sometimes it takes time to open up and tell someone what happened. That is a big step and you should be proud to have taken it.
richyShiny39
April 25th, 2018 12:05pm
Yes sometimes I remember when my baby passed away. There was so many emotions from everyone and aside from this I had to arrange a funeral. It took me about that long and I woke up after having nightmares. I started having anxiety bad and I had to see a therapist and a dr.
Anonymous
April 25th, 2018 4:41pm
Yeah sure...when something haunts you it doesn't get out of the minds but still trying to forget is best....
Anonymous
May 3rd, 2018 4:17pm
of course, PTSD can take years before to appear. and getting help at this time is essential. it's all an honnor that you are able to accept you need it, and seeking for it, here on 7cups and/or any resource that can help you to pass through it!
PinkFloyd65
May 8th, 2018 5:33pm
Of course. It’s never too late to become healthy again. Emotional abuse takes a while to heal from, but it can be healed.
Anonymous
May 23rd, 2018 6:36pm
For sure! You are allowed to be upset and to do something about it, you‘ve always been allowed to do so since it has started - abuse should not be tolerated and you should get help!
Anonymous
June 13th, 2018 2:22am
Of course! Sometimes our bodies delay our reactions to keep us safe. This is a very normal thing and don’t feel ashamed about it. You are valid.
ElaineSaysHello
June 14th, 2018 9:48pm
Even if it was ten years after it happened, it's still not too late to seek help. Seeking help is not something to be ashamed of and in fact, is one of the beginning steps in the recovery process
Anonymous
June 22nd, 2018 7:23pm
Yes of course. Getting help can help you get over what happened and sort out your feelings. It is never too late to get help
Allears247
June 24th, 2018 12:28pm
If you are still suffering from the affects of what ever happened 3 years ago I don't see why not. If it's a current problem for you it shouldn't matter how long ago it was. People bottle up things for way longer than 3 years and depending on what happened 3 years might not be that much time to cope.
Anonymous
June 24th, 2018 8:43pm
Of course. You are your own expert and if you feel like you need to process what happened, kudos to you for being brave enough to want to talk about it. I recommend working with a licensed therapist on this.
sereneHug87
July 15th, 2018 6:22pm
Yes definitely, When something traumatic happens to you, you have to deal with it/talk about it, even if it is a long time since it happened. Getting help would be the best thing that you could do for yourself.
Trancer
July 19th, 2018 11:11pm
Abuse can live with you for life. There is no time limit to seeking redress or help for this problem
CLMarshal57
July 25th, 2018 7:02pm
Hun, you can get help for abuse even if it happened 50 years ago. You can get help even if it did start a few years ago. Heck, I find it quite amazing that you are even considering getting help. I find it even more extraordinary that have recognized that you are acknowledging the abuse. I find it very brave when people take their own health into their own hands and start doing things for themselves. When people know that they should help themselves, I can't even describe how much I look up to them. It sounds simple enough, but so many people don't get help. So yes, you are more than qualified to get help. You can cry, even if it happened a while ago. Because, even though we might believe we are ok, we aren't. We still hear that snide voice as it tells us things that aren't true. You aren't worthless. You aren't ugly. You aren't stupid, nor are you a coward. You, my friend, is an amazing human being. Good luck.
Anonymous
August 12th, 2018 7:54pm
Yes because it normal. It’s okay to feel upset about a passed situation no matter how long ago because being upset is just a normal feeling like being happy.
RJordan0114
August 19th, 2018 11:21pm
Yes, for certain! Emotional abuse, like any kind of abuse, takes a toll on the survivor, no matter how long it has been or how strong they are. For some people, it may take months or years to realize the impact it has had and to get help in dealing with the emotions and problems it can cause. There is no time limit on the feelings and being upset because of what has happened to you. There is also no time limit on looking for some help from a fellow peer or a professional counselor, it's a very wise idea.
Anonymous
October 5th, 2018 8:25am
Yes, everybody experiences emotional trauma differently. trauma for me was compartmentalized for about 4 years and slowly leaked out. I am just not getting the help I need from the war in Iraq from 4 years ago. I have along way to go. today most people have only reason to tell me why I am wrong and inflicting more emotional trauma into my life. I have no reason to feel bad for a 2 way street. my actions were just and have been just for 3 years now. and today I am having difficulties keeping people cut out of my life and "intrusive thoughts", witch every way you want me to describe it. All I know, things happen for a reason, and third parties make them happen always. one reason I hate therapists and psychologists is because they can never mind their own business. I would rather be left to helping my self.
Anonymous
July 30th, 2016 12:45pm
You are entitled to express your emotions over it whenever that happens, and to get support for managing them as well... no deadline for experiencing the effects of emotional abuse... whenevever you feel ready to start dealing with it, is the right time. Trust the process.
complexdesign1
August 1st, 2016 10:02pm
You are totally allowed to feel upset about and seek help for an incident that occurred some time ago. For people who go through abuse it is not abnormal for them to be confused or lost with how to feel and respond which means it can take time to re-orientate one's self.
Anonymous
August 3rd, 2016 11:38am
Of course you are allowed to be upset no matter what you do it will still be in your Mind however , if you want to deal with the upset have you tried counselling? They could help with strageties to cope with the situation you are grieving over
delightfulHeart20
August 4th, 2016 2:12pm
yes! emotional abuse can leave a scar on you for a long time. it might shock you at first, but with time it will give you pain. get Help and support! people got to the therapist in times because of something that happened in there childhood.
carefreeNarwhal88
August 7th, 2016 5:09pm
Yeah, also it's ok to be sad and emotional, what you went through is not easy and horrible, you must have gotten hurt
AuntieGinger
August 10th, 2016 5:51pm
Yes. There is no time like the present to start healing.
Anonymous
August 10th, 2016 7:49pm
Of course you are allowed... There are people out there who have been abused badly years ago, and have gotten help in their adult years.. Honestly it is better to get help as soon as possible because that hidden anger or sorrow won't go away on it's own and from experience...I've seen abused victims who didn't get help and they carry around such anger with them each day...But each day it just eats at them more and more...Pain doesn't just go away and the best thing you can do for yourself is to get help when you sense there is a problem. Good for you for getting help!
TranquilLavenderFields
August 11th, 2016 9:45pm
I believe so. We are all individual and therefore heal/grieve at different paces. It would be highly beneficial for you. Well done in taking this step.
negiducky
August 25th, 2016 5:02pm
An emotional response in any form to any event, whether immediate or delayed, good or bad is completely human. The presence of any pyschosocial and environmental factors and triggers still do not change the first fact.
Anonymous
August 31st, 2016 7:31pm
you are allowed to get upset at any time that you fell needed because there is no time limit on when the effect will kick in.
jakfullofwandering
September 5th, 2016 4:38pm
Absolutely! Seeking help doesn't have a set timeline, being upset doesn't either. You are valid in how you feel and your path to healing.
ffmedic
September 14th, 2016 9:15am
Heck yes you are allowed to be upset! Our bodies and minds have no statutes of limitations inside regarding anything that happens to us. Some people do not start to think or process a situation or chain of events until after that person has been long gone from their lives or something similar to that. Also, people abused as children don't normally think what happens at home is "bad" until they're adults or later in life and then go back and have some emotional turmoil about the abuse that happened to them as children. I say when you finally connect and become aware of the feelings inside, don't trap them. work through them healthily. :)