My parents don't listen to me, what should I do?
Last Updated: 01/14/2022 at 11:19pm
Halayma Khatun, M.A Theology(U.K, UAE), Diploma With Distinction in Counseling, Certification trauma abandonment
Compassionate, patient, experienced depression counselor. I use Psychodynamic counseling techniques. My counseling experience is +8 years, I counsel women.
Top Rated Answers
Well, the answer to this question depends on a lot of factors--right from your age to the culture you belong to. And most importantly, what are they not listening to you about? From my personal experience, more often than not, it is teenagers who have problems with their parents, so I am going to assume you are a teenager as well. Most parents don't listen to what their kids have got to say about matters because they fail to see that their child is growing up and is becoming more mature with each day that passes by. Probably the best way to tackle this is by keeping your cool. Remember that no matter how infuriating they can get, they are still your parents [and if you are a minor, they have considerable power over you] and you must ensure that you do not flip. Staying level headed helps you maintain your sanity and trying to convince them in a calm state of mind goes a long way in helping you prove your point. It will also make you sound far more superior than them when you are in zen mode despite the terse situation. If you want a detailed response that is specific to your situation, then you will have to describe your case in a little more detail.
Express how much it hurts when they don't listen to you. Tell them you want to have a good relationship with them but you don't feel like you can do that if they aren't listening to you.
Your parents knows best because, they are more experienced than you are. Children should listen to their parents and not the other way around.
sometimes parents think they no best and dont like hearing otherwize. remotley there is nothing you can do, besides trying to get them to hear you out
My mother can be dismissive and sometimes just ignore me. Like, on purpose. I found that talking to someone else can help. I have a therapist, and counselor that I talk to because my parents won't.
parents sometimes feel they are in the right and dont listen but you need to state what you want and keep repeating it until the do hear you may take lots of work but it will in the end good luck sending a hug
What are the methods you have tried in order to get your parents to listen to you? I feel like parents see themselves as authoritative figures and feel like they know what is best. From personal experience, when my parents would not listen to me (verbally), I took the time to write a letter to them and just let them read it for themselves. Turned out to help a lot!
I understand this feeling very well and I think it is a common feeling for people to have about their parents. It is my opinion that we absolutely need to be honest in all our relationships from family relationships to dating. If we hide or repress what we are feeling and thinking, the relationship has a strong tendency to become unhealthy for both sides or all sides. It is better I believe to be straightforward and honest than to repress your feelings and keep them inside. That said, you might think about finding a time to talk to mom and dad about your feelings: that you don't think they are listening to you. This gives them the opportunity to change their behavior. I would use what I call a sandwiching technique. You start the conversation off very nicely with something about how you love them and you need them to listen to what you have to say right now because it is really important to you. Then you tell them how you feel using "I feel" statements, which put people less on the defensive. So you might say "I feel like you do not listen to me because x, y, and z. And that makes me feel this way." Then wrap up the conversation by saying something about how you know they love you and you feel that them listening to you would be very meaningful.
Explain it in a way they'll listen. It's not that they don't listen to you because they don't want to, it's just that they want you to take the right path always. If you're very sure what you want is right, explain it to them in a good way. :)
Have you tried to approach them about this? They might not even realize that they are ignoring the things you say. Your parents do have control over you but it's important to remember that you are your own person with your own individual needs. Good luck friend!
I would suggest to try writing them a letter (or an email), explaining everything you want to say. This means your thoughts will be well thought out, coherent and organized, and they have to take into account everything you have to say before responding. Also, this will make it less likely that the discussion will escalate into an argument.
Parents are the creators of our world with tons of experience more than us, If they are doing something it has to be of some use for the kids. So firstly try to follow the path of your parents. In case you don't want to follow their path, prove them theoretically that you know what the right path for yourself is, if you are able to convince them with your thoughts, they will listen. Still if they do not listen, think about the worse case scenario of your path, what can be the worst result about your path, even after thinking of the worst case scenario of your path your are not afraid and convinced that this is the right path for you, GO AHEAD ON YOUR OWN and show the world. Wishing you all the best. May the joy be with you:-)!!!
If your parents don't listen to you, think back at everything they have done for you in the past. When you got sick, when you had a bad day at school, when you won an award, when you played a sport... Believe it or not, your parents listen to you more than you realize. After I realized that, my mother and I became best friends. When I didn't feel like she listened, it actually wasn't that she wasn't listening, it was that she didn't understand the situation from my point of view. I encourage anyone who feels that their parents don't listen to them, to give them a chance and to look at it from their point of view.
Ask to sit down with them and speak calmly, clearly and maturely, this way they'll be more open to listen to what you have to say and you will have each other's full attention.
Maybe the way you're approaching them isn't as effective as it could be. It's easier done than said, but sitting them down and telling them how you feel in a mature way might show them you're worth listening to!
That can be tough and I know how that feels. I would sit down with them with no distractions e.g, phones, tvs, laptop etc and discuss how you really feel. It can be hard feeling like your not listened to or worthy. Say in depth how you feel and get some feedback from them too.
If you see that your parents don't listen to you, try taking a step back, calming down, and asking yourself some questions. What are you arguing about? Can you reach a compromise? I found that whenever I couldn't agree with my parents, it helped a lot.
Try listening to your parents
You could try writing them a letter explaining how you feel and what you want to change about the relationship you have.
You should try to connect with them in a different way. Maybe in a more compassionate way. Tell them how you're feeling, and it bothers you that they are not giving your their full attention.
i understand it may be hard, but try talking to close relative to talk to them for you, if you feel they wont listen to you at all, may be try talking to someone you think they listen to and he/she can be able to talk to them on your behalf. thanks
You can try to sit down with them and talk with them. If that doesn't work, maybe write them a letter explaining how you feel!
Maybe they don't realize you have the need for them to listen to you. Start a conversation with "Hey mum/dad, I have this topic - do you have time to listen to me?". Maybe that works. If not, think about finding other people to listen to you.
Politely confront your parents, in a time where they don't have prior distractions and ask them to pay some more attention to your opinions and feelings. It's a big step but should make you feel much better and help them understand how you feel because chances are they don't even realise it.
Sometimes your parents will not always listen because they believe you do not know enough. You can approach a conversation level headed and ask to speak to them one on one about something that is on your mind. If this does not work you can tell the you have a concern or problem that you need help with but you would like to explain the entire situation before they help.
Try to talk to them calmly. Always start with "i feel.." and express your concerns. Do not start arguments with them, always take the calm way.
Sit them down and tell them that you would need a few minutes of their time to listen to you. Then tell them what you want them to hear you say.
You should try to express how serious you are and how much it means to you. Maybe sit them down for a serious chat and tell them what is on your mind. Good luck!
Talk to them about how you're feeling ignored when you can; they do get busy with work and stressing about you
Remember the way you were pampered in your childhood. Its your time to pamper them now to make them understand your perspective. With your age, they are also growing old. So its your responsibility to understand their childish mind and tell them warmly about what you wish for.
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