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How can I explain homosexuality to my parents?

221 Answers
Last Updated: 05/26/2022 at 9:51pm
How can I explain homosexuality to my parents?
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United States
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Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
April 23rd, 2016 1:03am
You were born this way. Everything on earth is natural, if God did not want you to be this way, you wouldn't.
Anonymous
March 13th, 2019 12:51am
If you have very ignorant parents, then this would not be a wise idea. If, however, you have very understanding and loving parents, then yes I would recommend trying to explain this to them. Before I begin, I would tell you something very important. If you have ignorant parents, I would recommend waiting until you are fully independent. I say this because I have witnessed, first hand, Countless parents disowning or kicking their children out of their home for being gay. If you have very understanding parents, then I would recommend telling them as you would prevent carrying all this weight on your shoulders. In order to explain homosexuality to your parents, please follow the following steps. Firstly, make sure that they are not already stressed out or dealing with other difficult situations. Secondly, sit them down, preferably in a private area and make sure to stay on topic. Thirdly, go ahead and tell them. Don't be worried if they are speechless as this is common in these kinds of situation, just give them time and honestly answer any questions they may ask. And finally, don't be afraid to express your emotions, If you feel like crying then cry.
Probius
May 21st, 2016 6:24am
You can tell your parents that you love someone of the same sex, as opposed to the opposite sex. Nothing else is different about you.
RaCat
February 9th, 2016 7:51pm
I haven't explained it yet (even if I identify myself as bisexual) because it's one of he hardest thing to do when your parents are homofobics. But I think that the truly loving parents would accept them child no matter what sexuality he has, maybe it will take a little bit more time than always but at the end of the day, they will understand. Just try o be honest, show them what it is to be like this and show that it's still you, that nothing ever changed.
dancingBeauty97
June 5th, 2016 10:48pm
Homosexuals are just like any one else. They love like other people and care like any one else. They have nothing wrong with them. They are the same just like "straight people"
HelpWisely
June 4th, 2016 7:08am
What is there to explain? Just tell them that you are a homosexual and that is the reality of who you are. You are still a human being even if your sexual orientation is towards homosexuality.
Anonymous
September 27th, 2015 3:48am
I think it's best to wait sometimes. Explain it to them if you have a safe place to go, or are out on your own. I know how hard this is, I'm waiting right now too. I've tried explaining some things, but haven't..come out about anything yet. I feel they wouldnt understand. So I'd rather be somewhere safe and then explain it to them, so I know I have a home somewhere. As far as ways to explain it, maybe mention that homosexuals dont choose who they're attracted to any more than heterosexuals do. Find the facts to back it up, but dont push too far past personal lines all at once. Acceptance is a process. For some, that processing time is quick and painless, while others take much longer. Much love and I hope this helps ^~^
optimisticPumpkin82
June 17th, 2016 12:22am
You could explain homosexuality to your parents by telling them that homosexuality is not that much different from a normal relationship. Only thing different is that with guys you have a male and male and girls it's a girl and girl. Love is love no matter what.
sunalchemy
June 4th, 2016 2:23am
First you have to make a short and reassuring introduction like .. the other day i found instead of i've got something to say it's less stressful. Second you explain how gradually you found that you were homosexual and that they actually nothing to fear you will stay the same. The rest will depend on your parents reaction !
SimplyBeing
May 8th, 2016 5:50pm
I have struggled to explain homosexuality to many people I care about. For me, people began to understand when I started talking more about how I feel than why I felt that way and how I became homosexual. Your feelings are yours and you deserve to have your feelings respected. Your experience of being homosexual is what matters. When I made my explanation more about "this is who I am and how I feel, right here and right now" people began to hear the authenticity in my voice and they started working to understand it themselves. I wish you peace ~J
SMStar
July 9th, 2016 7:26pm
Homosexuality is love for the same gender as yourself. Though it may differ from how society portrays what a relationship should be, a relationship is always moving, building, and growing. Love is love no matter what gender or pronouns or preferences people have. Love should not be discouraged based on people's gender.
BubblySerenity91
June 10th, 2016 1:01am
You know what works best with your parents, but do your best to make it easy and clear to understand
bhetherson4
June 11th, 2016 3:24am
Homosexuality is love for the same gender as yourself. Though it may differ from how society portrays what a relationship should be, a relationship is always moving, building, and growing. Love is love no matter what gender or pronouns or preferences people have. Love should not be discouraged based on people's gender.
tiredsnail
March 31st, 2018 6:50pm
To begin, it is recommended not to come out in an unsafe environment. If you are comfortable, explain that you feel an attraction to the same gender.
Anonymous
June 23rd, 2016 1:39am
Sit down with them and have a calm and trusting talk. Don't just spring it on them, but lead them calmly into the subject.
RedVase1234
June 9th, 2018 10:12pm
You can start by telling your parents that 2 people of the same sex or gender can feel the same kind of love, affection, and attraction as heterosexual couples do. Understand they might have questions, and be open to answering them the best you can
Anonymous
September 11th, 2019 4:44pm
The simplest way to explain homosexuality to someone is that you like the same gender and would make love with exclusively the same gender. If they don’t understand this, then try that you don’t like any other gender but the one you identify as. If they say homosexuality isn’t normal, well, it’s found in 450+ species while homophobia is found only in one. Another way to deal with hate is to tell them that it’s not a choice- you are literally born gay(it’s been proven!) so it’s not something you can control. In the end, it’s your choice on how to explain it to them, and I’m sure it’ll go well!
Aayla
- Expert in LGBTQ+ Issues
August 9th, 2019 10:21pm
It's all about telling them openly how you it feels to be homosexual, how you realize it, and what it means to live as homosexual. Make sure you tell them about why certain common misconception are wrong and what is really true, for example the fact that homosexuality is something innate and not a choice or a consequence of some life events. Let them know that gay people can be as happy and in love as any other. Let them know you're available to answer any question they might have, and most importantly, be as open-hearted as you can! Good luck!
NekoBread
September 22nd, 2015 2:15am
Just try to tell them of the easiest and informative way you can, and when you see that is a good timing; if you can, get support for some friend or someone that be there for you in these hard times. and info yourself about other cases like you.
TylerDelRey
April 21st, 2016 5:24am
The best way to explain is to tell them that its natural. No one chooses their sexuality, so they shouldn't be judged for that!
BlissfulNathalie24
January 28th, 2018 7:51pm
Congratulations for discovering you sexuality and starting to think about how you will come out to your family! I'm so proud of you for coming to 7 Cups and exploring your options. Feel free to chat with me about this! I know it can be stressful and scary and at times feel alone. @BlissfulNathalie24 ! My short advice is to form a plan! Sounds easier that it is. Write down the best case scenario of what you WISH would happen. Now write down the worst thing that can happen. Could you get kicked out of your home? Made fun of? .. Think about that. Now go online. Find an LGBTQ+ support group (I work for one called the LGBT Life Center, Is there one of those in your city?) There, they will have hotlines, support groups, and even safe housing resources and everything to ease your fears! Think about THAT! .. Now tell a trusted friend. It is easier, for some reason, to come out to a friend you've known a few years than it is your family who has known you your whole life. Use this as a practice run for your parents... Now think about HOW you will tell them. The where and when. Will you tell mom first and then dad? Or will you do it over dinner like an announcement? Maybe have a sibling lay the ground work of telling them and then all you have to do is confirm it later? It is ALL your decision. What YOU are comfortable with. I'm so glad you are choosing to show the world who you are. This is a very vulnerable thing to do and I want to welcome you to this beautiful LGBTQ+ community.
calmingSalamander18
June 7th, 2018 3:07pm
This can seem daunting and a difficult subject to approach. I've had to go through similar things with my own parents and it depends on how open and accepting they are. If you know that they will be ok with it then I would suggest trying to open a discussion with them about it - maybe bring up a local pride event in a near town? If you think they could be less accepting then test the waters - do you know anyone lgbt in real life or on tv? If so try mentioning that to them at dinner or in the car. Gage their reaction - if they don't seem to mind then maybe it's worth trying to open a discussion. Remember, though, that your safety always comes first: do not risk your safety!! I wish you luck and I hope that it all turns out ok - it has with my family so there is always hope.
Olweg
July 1st, 2018 9:08pm
Some people are heterosexual. Other are homosexual. It's not any more a choice than being heterosexual. It's not a disease or a perversion, it's just a bit less common than heterosexuality. And most importantly : it's not about sex, but about love. (or at least, as much as heterosexuality is :p). Attraction is like a spectrum : it can evolve in one's life, and it can stay the same all one's life.
iman2002
July 12th, 2018 11:31am
Homosexuality is when a the same genders are attracted towards each other. They feel the physical attraction too.
NiyahBaptiste
June 5th, 2018 11:11pm
Explain it in the way that makes the most sense to you, Explain how its not a choice its not an option its natural. That its as natural as taking your first breath. You persay might not know at the time that you are a Homosexual but its there and when you finally do decide to come out, just try to express that its not a choice its something thats always inside of you, like being good at basketball; for some thats just something they themselves are good at, for others they just arnt. Thats homosexuality its a sexual preference that is deeply rooted inside a person, its a romantic attraction, sexual attraction or sexual behavior between members of the same sex or gender. And then just leave it at that.
Allears247
July 25th, 2018 8:13am
Tell them that is the sexual attraction to one of the same sex. That it can happen both naturally and unnaturally. That a gay man likes a man the same way a straight woman likes a man. It's just the way your brain is wired.
S229
August 12th, 2018 1:05am
Slowly. Give them time to process, its not a race and you most certainly don't want to seem unsure of it
Teenagehelp
July 28th, 2018 2:48pm
Coming out- is a big step to a new reality. Why do you recognize yourself as a homosexual ? If you have already thought about all pros and cons of being homosexual, then do it. Try to tell it at the time, you will be completely ready for that. Actually, parents are people who always love and understand so just be you when you talk about your secuality
Sandra98
July 19th, 2018 1:24pm
Tough question. If your parents are homophobic it's gonna be hard to change their view. But it is good to teach them and remind them that homosexuality is natural and normal. You're just borned with that. Scientist are not 100% sure what causes sexuality but parents shoudn't blame themselves if their child is homosexual because as I said it's normal and natural. Around 5-10% of population is homosexual... but I'd guess it's even more like 15-20%. So it's not that small number.
ephender
May 16th, 2018 4:11am
This is a hard one- one that doesn't really have a universal answer. If your goal is to explain homosexuality for the purpose of just explaining sexuality- you can direct them to the American Psychological Association or the American Psychiatric Association to show that homosexual is a natural variant of human sexuality. In contrast, if this is about "coming out". You have to always prioritize your safety. As a queer person- you will always be "coming out" for the rest of your life- at work, at school, etc. But WHEN and HOW you do it is YOUR choice. I recommend coming out ONLY if you feel as though it is safe to do. Have a back up plan incase things do not go as you would like them. Join our LGBT support group, or our community group for inspiration and ideas. Most of all- be proud who you are- because you are special- you have self worth- you matter. GOOD LUCK!