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Why am I so nervous around my girlfriend?

197 Answers
Last Updated: 01/07/2022 at 7:23am
Why am I so nervous around my girlfriend?
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Jennifer Patterson, LMFT, ATR-BC

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Life can be messy. Sometimes you need a little support to make your way through it. I love to help guide people through their challenges & to find the beauty in our messes.

Top Rated Answers
June 25th, 2016 1:12pm
Being nervous around your girlfriend could mean different things: 1. You could be feeling stronger emotions about her than before and worrying if she's not feeling the same way. 2. You could be thinking that your girlfriend doesn't love you the same. 3. You could be drifting apart from her and not realizing it. 4. You could be feeling guilty for something.
March 27th, 2016 6:50pm
That is normal. You are just embarrassed, many people feel that way. Once you get more comfortable dating her, and more comfortable with other people knowing you're dating her, you will feel much better
May 1st, 2016 9:38am
Are you desperate to keep her happy? In a relationship you want to keep each other happy and sometimes this pressure becomes a bit scary and overwhelming, maybe it's even some insecurity about not feeling your equal to her. Let me tell you, whatever you did to end up in this relationship you deserve to be in it and it's okay to relax a little. I'm positive she loves you back! 😀
April 9th, 2016 9:38am
I'm insanely nervous around my girlfriend too! It's really easy to miscommunicate and feel like you're messing everything up that you do or saying the wrong thing all the time, when in fact you're probably doing pretty well. Having a girlfriend is a big deal and not something that should be taken lightly. If you wasn't nervous around your girlfriend at least sometimes, I'd question that more.
May 29th, 2016 4:12pm
There are many reasons, a couple being you don't trust her; this could be from someone she has done in the past or something someone has done to you causing you to be afraid history will repeat itself and making you anxious about your girlfriend.
March 25th, 2016 1:06am
Maybe if it's a new relationship, or even just because your shy. Sometimes it takes ten times longer for someone to get comfortable with someone.
August 5th, 2016 9:48pm
It takes time to adjust to a relationship. You could just need get used to the relationship. It's also common to be worried or anxious because you think she doesn't feel the same way. Or are worried about how stable the relationship is.
April 3rd, 2016 11:18pm
You love/like her! Of course you feel nervous around her. You wouldn't want to upset her would you? It's very common to feel nervous around girlfriends/boyfriends. Don't worry! You'll be fine.
April 8th, 2016 8:16pm
Nervousness stems from anxiety about a certain thing -- most likely an insecurity about something. Whether it's a fear of getting chastised when you speak your mind or losing her "love" for you if you mess up, it's an indication that you might not be very comfortable around her. Try spending more time around her and getting to know her. Make sure to set boundaries and, remember, communicate. I can't tell you enough how important it is to communicate with her on a regular basis.
April 29th, 2016 1:14pm
It could be that you really like her and possibly love her, and it could be that you are afraid to embarrass yourself or do the wrong thing in front of her.
March 28th, 2018 6:02pm
nervousness may occur if you aren’t sure how you really feel. is it a new relationship? are they your first girlfriend? if so, you may just need to adjust to this new thing in your life and use it to guide you into a better wellbeing.
June 3rd, 2018 5:36am
It shows that you really care about her and when you care about someone there will be a correlation between love and fear. That fear being the fear of losing her or pushing her away. It helps to imagine that everything is perfect in your relationship and that she lives you for who you are (which she probably does). After that, you can be yourself.
April 2nd, 2016 9:06pm
It really depends! If it's a new relationship, it's probably because you're still getting to know each other. This can be a nerve-wracking time, and I want you to know that it's normal and okay to be nervous. When a relationship is still fresh, you might be more conscious of your words and actions, wondering how the other person will react to them. This then makes you nervous. When you like someone a lot, you want to impress them, and you want them to like you back. Therefore you might be more nervous around someone you like compared to your friends. Once you become comfortable in the relationship, the nervousness should fade. If you've been in a relationship with your girlfriend and you're still feeling nervous, there might be something else going on. Try to make a list of possible reasons you're nervous around your girlfriend. This might help you figure out why you're feeling this way!
April 27th, 2016 10:17pm
You could be feeling like you're going to mess something up with her. Just be yourself and if she doesn't love you for who you are, you know she isn't the right one. Best of luck!
May 8th, 2017 3:42am
Let me guess, you're nervous around your girlfriend because you're worried about what she's thinking about you. Be confidant, girls love confidence in a guy. Most of all, be yourself.
May 1st, 2016 4:59pm
You're nervous around your girlfriend because you think that she may judge you. So, you are nervous because the focus is on you and your personal flaws.
March 27th, 2016 8:27pm
Are you nervous around anyone else? Is there anything you're hiding from your girlfriend? Is there something specific your girlfriend does that makes you nervous? In an ideal relationship, all partners should feel mutual comfort and there should be clear communication. If your girlfriend is already familiar to you or you get to know her better and she knows the real you then likely you won't be as nervous anymore.
March 30th, 2016 6:00am
There are many reasons why one could be nervous around one's girlfriend! You could be feeling some anxiety due to the fact that you don't want to say all the right things and do the right things. It's important to remember that everyone is human and she's not expecting you to be a perfect superhuman!
March 30th, 2016 10:38pm
Are you worried about making a mistake? Are you worried she might no longer like you if you do something? You could be nervous just because you like her and are unsure how to go forward in your relationship with her. You could be nervous because of a lot of things, see how you react to her, when you do, and ask why. Are you nervous before you see her? Are you only nervous around her, or when you'r speaking with her? Do you remain nervous afterwards?
April 6th, 2016 2:25am
It could just be the nerves from the start of a new relationship. Or if you've been together for a while (6+ months), it's possible something one of you do makes you feel uncomfortable and you should think about it. Look into it. Also, try to relax. she's with you because she wants to be, and as long as you want to be with her, it'll all be okay :)
April 7th, 2016 3:58pm
That depends on your feelings in consideration with her feelings as well as your environment. Communication is key; talk is out.
April 8th, 2016 9:33am
beacuse you love her and your afraid to do something wrong around her just in case she hates you your be fine
April 8th, 2016 2:35pm
You may be in a constant state of worry that she may not appreciate the things you do. Even simple things like holding her hand may be difficult due to being worried that she might not like it.
April 17th, 2016 6:06am
If this is a new relationship it is normal new relationships are full of mystery as to how it will b
April 21st, 2016 12:49am
With my experience you are probably nervous around your girlfriend because you feel like you need to be "perfect" you might be scared that she isn't gonna like you for you. You just need to calm down and trust that she loves you.
April 21st, 2016 5:53am
this is normal, With time you will find her to be the best company and also remember women like confident men.
April 23rd, 2016 8:11pm
If you are new to dating or very young; then this is normal you are most likely worried about mistakes you might make with her and trying to be someone you arent to please her etc always be yourself Be respectful polite and honest and take your time When the nerves go then that probably means its going well, Most women just want the security of knowing you are being yourself: honest caring and thoughtful.. Don't think too hard about it just be natural not fake! .
April 27th, 2016 8:17am
This is a very natural human reaction especially when your newly dating or you feel the need to impress her.
April 29th, 2016 2:43pm
it may have different reasons such as ur afraid of not being as perfect as she is or maybe ur afraid of doing something that she doesnt like and make her annoyed
April 29th, 2016 5:21pm
Why aren't you nervous around someone stranger?Who you don't care about? Well that's it. You are nervous, because she means something to you, because you CARE. There is nothing wrong about that.