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He cheated on his girlfriend with me. Why is he ignoring me?

205 Answers
Last Updated: 11/21/2021 at 5:35am
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United States
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Amy Justice, BS, MA, LCMHC

Licensed Professional Counselor

My passion is to help people overcome feeling "stuck" in unhealthy patterns by facilitating real, healthy changes through self-discovery and practical applications.

Top Rated Answers
April 17th, 2018 8:01am
He doesn't love her, if he did he would respect her. May be he's just confused between you two , let him be clear and make his decision . Ask him whether he is guilty about what he did . Too bad you fell for it, because years from now you'll realize that you have wasted your life being somebody's hetaera. Not only that, but being in this situation will prevent you from meeting somebody who's meant to be in your life 100% . he divided his attention to both of you hope you can start valuing yourself as a person, and as a woman . Don't you think?
May 30th, 2018 12:02pm
Because he doesn't value you, just like he doesn't value his girlfriend. You don't want to be with a cheater do you? If he cheated on her, he will likely cheat on you too.
July 18th, 2018 2:18am
he might be ignoring you because he's trying to be around his girlfriend
July 18th, 2018 6:30am
That fact is he is a CHEATER! Why would you expect any other behaviour. The fact is why would you expect him to behave any differently with you? He is a total gem. Personally I think you need to take time out and get in touch with yourself. You helped him cheat on a girl- is this what you think you are worth? Please find some self love and find a single guy to be with. Always ask the question as to how a guy status wise before starting a new relationship. Get to know each other as friends and wether or not you meet his friends and family. Cheaters get what cheaters get.
July 19th, 2018 11:04pm
He doesn't know what to feel and what not to. He's probably emotionally lost. Probably just trying to figure himself out a bit
July 26th, 2018 4:12am
He may be feeling guilt for cheating. Maybe she found out about the two of you. You should confront him about what is going on.
August 9th, 2018 5:26pm
He may feel guilty about hurting her and also hurting you, I would give him so time to sort out these emotions.
November 9th, 2019 2:13pm
Sometimes people feel insecure in themselves due to low self-esteem, They seek validation in others as it makes them feel good about themselves, They also want the benefits of a long term girlfriend or partner, Clearly they are drawn back to that partner and are now scared that this infidelity will be revealed, Their behaviour in ignoring you is not your fault and you are a valuable person, It is more a reflection of the man in question, If you were together he would also cheat on you too, It is important to value and love yourself and realise you do not need others to define this for you, You are good enough.
November 9th, 2020 10:44pm
Hello. Thank you for the question. It could be that you both are feeling guilty of it. It could be that he doesn't know what he wants in a relationship. It could be that you are feeling guilty yourself. Does he talk about marriage ? Do you talk about it ? Are you both in a serious relationship ? Is the relationship emotionally connecting you both ? It could be all these things why it is not working. He may have no moral responsibility towards you or your ex. You are now feeling dejected for stealing someone's happiness and not feeling better. I hope this answer helps a bit. Take care. Be true to yourself.
May 17th, 2016 2:56pm
Maybe because his girlfriend doesn't know or he hasn't told her yet? He may find it easier to distance himself from you until he knows what he's going to do regarding that situation
May 18th, 2016 6:39pm
He is ignoring you because he has a girlfriend and you're the other woman. Forget about him, you don't need that.
May 18th, 2016 11:39pm
He may feel regretful of the situation, or just confused in general. Maybe you should try texting him first!
May 27th, 2016 11:50am
There are so many reasons he could be ignoring you. If he isn't making you a priotity, then he is not worth your time and you should move on and ignore him when he contacts you back. I was with someone during my breakup and went back to my husband, he feels I ignore him. I can only explain from my experience that if he didn't leave and stay gone (and choose you), he will have you as second best on his list, not a priority, if you allow him to.
May 27th, 2016 3:30pm
Sometimes when a guy cheats with you he was insecure about the relationship. Maybe he is ignoring you to find out what he was insecure about or even to be honest with is girlfriend and try to make things better.
June 2nd, 2016 11:21pm
He could be ignoring you because he feels unfaithful to his girlfriend, he could also be speaking to his girlfriend about what you both have done and trying to break up with her so make matters easier.
June 3rd, 2016 5:58pm
He probably doesn't think he needs to give you any attention, for him you're just a someone right now
June 5th, 2016 9:45pm
This is something that a lot of us have went through. There could be a number of reasons, chances are he probably assumed that it was a casual hook up and didn't feel the need to get back to you because he's afraid you might want to be in a committed relationship. Another reason could be that he's scared that his girlfriend might find out, which is why he wants to cut all ties from you
June 9th, 2016 6:36am
He may feel guilty about the situation because he had a moment where he questioned his relationship with his girlfriend. So he cheated. Afterwards he realized the mistake he made and he's probably trying to forget it even happened.
June 11th, 2016 5:20am
Maybe he feels guilty about the pain he's caused you and his girlfriend. He did the wrong thing by cheating on her, he may realize his mistake now and wishes to keep you out.
June 11th, 2016 9:31pm
Because maybe he understood it was wrong and he is guilty. You also should move on. Maybe he really likes his gf
June 12th, 2016 8:02am
Maybe he is going through a guilt phase, or maybe this time he is cheating on you with someone else..... All the best and good luck!!
June 16th, 2016 8:21am
Either he figured things out with his girlfriend and wants to make things right. He just wanted to use you. He feels guilty for what he did to her and you. He doesn't want to hurt you anymore. There are many reasons why he could be ignoring you and many reasons why he did it. What is important is how you feel about what happened and is happening, if you want to be with a man who is willing to cheat on his girlfriend with you. And why you feel he cheated on her, not just the reasons you come up with to make it feel right, but the real deep down reasons.
June 30th, 2016 2:06pm
Perhaps his girlfriend found out, perhaps guilt has started to kick in for him and perhaps he got scared of running two relationships at the same time - whatever it was, you are worth someone much better than that!
July 2nd, 2016 8:04am
There is a chance that he feels guilty about what he did and is trying to ignore the situation, so the problem goes away.
August 6th, 2016 6:48am
He must be feeling guilty or there must be something that is causing him to ignore you.. He could be in a different emotional plane right now.
August 13th, 2016 9:19am
We all have a code of values. Some we learn intuitively, some come from society or family. When we violate these values it can be difficult to make sense of ourselves leaving us feeling confused and guilty. Which in turn can lead us to turn off from what we have done on an emotional level. Ignoring you is a way of not confronting this inner conflict that he is contending with.
August 24th, 2016 1:28pm
He might love you or he might've regretted cheating but in both ways you shouldn't depend on him because if he cheated on his girlfriend he might also cheat on you
August 26th, 2016 8:57am
He might have been looking to blow off some steam, he got that covered the first time you guys were together. Now he's probably feeling regret towards his girlfriend and he is therefore ignoring you. He's not worth spending your time on, if he could cheat on his current girlfriend he could easily cheat on you as well.
August 27th, 2016 12:32am
Maybe because he has to manage his time with you and his other girlfriend. He doesn't want his other girlfriend know he's cheating on her, right? (:
August 27th, 2016 3:47pm
because may be he is guilty for that and realized that he did wrong doing what he did when he was have girl friend