Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav

Why is he ignoring me after breakup?

303 Answers
Last Updated: 08/24/2020 at 6:16pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
Portugal
Moderated by

Jennifer Patterson, LMFT

Art Therapist

Life can be messy. Sometimes you need a little support to make your way through it. I love to help guide people through their challenges & to find the beauty in our messes.

Top Rated Answers
marianaschled
November 15th, 2017 2:05pm
Sometimes it's best to give someone time, especially after a breakup. He might be informing you for various reasons, but surely it's about him, and not about you. Remember, you aren't doing anything wrong, and you shouldn't worry about it. He might still have feelings for you, or he just needs to take his time before becoming friends or even just acquaintances again. If you need anything, come talk to me! I'm open to listening!
Nellie33
May 19th, 2016 9:26pm
May be because he is unable to face you,u can simply try asking him in a general way to know why is doing that!
txalant
June 13th, 2016 3:27pm
It is possible that he could be mourning the breakup. Talking to you or seeing you could trigger old feelings, and it may be too difficult for him right now.
Future737Pilot
June 14th, 2016 6:29pm
There could be many reasons why he is ignoring you. It could be because he is trying to cope with what happened. It also could be because he wants to be alone.
Askath
July 15th, 2016 10:20am
Most likely he needs some distance from you, in order to feel better again. I did the same. felt in love with a really good friend but she got another guy. I took more and more distance because i couldn´t stand the pain seein her. Everyone handles breakups differently, but taking distance is quite common I think
Anonymous
June 12th, 2016 11:28pm
He told me it wasn't work out because of distance, and because he needed to "find himself" again. As if our relationship, took parts of him away? I think we push each other away because we know how hard it is to be alone, and we go searching for the confidence needed to be ourselves again. I suggest maybe he's looking to separate who he was with you, from who he is now?
phi123
December 22nd, 2016 6:19am
People are weird and complicated. He could be ignoring you for a number of reasons but the most likely is that he's trying to move on/get used to not being in a relationship with you. It's awkward getting over someone and getting used to not being in a relationship so he's probably just dealing with it in his own way. I wouldn't worry too much about it. Some people find ignoring someone an easier way to adapting to post-breakup life. But if it's concerning you it may be a good idea to talk to him about it and ask why. :)
Safehaven47
July 30th, 2017 10:37am
Well that depends on why y'all broke up to begin with. It may be that he is ready to move on with his life and keeping in touch with you will prevent him from doing that. It may be that he is ashamed of what he did and doesn't feel worthy of your attention. Or it may be that he feels guilty for letting go of the best thing the ever happened to him.
Anonymous
August 29th, 2018 12:28am
I know how frustrating that feeling can be, no one likes to feel ignored, especially by someone they love. Some people have different coping mechanisms and handle breakups differently. Maybe he just wants some space and some time to himself to make sure he made the right decision for himself. I am so sorry you are feeling ignored by him. How many times have you tried to reach out? Want to tell me a bit more about your break up? I am here to actively listen and point you in the right direction of great resources and information that might be useful.
Raspberrycheesecake
June 13th, 2018 10:57am
After a breakup it can be very hard for both you and the other person. He is ignoring you for reasons that you might have not considered. It could be because he has work or something is going on in his personal life. Either way, just Gove it some time and he might start talking to you again.
enchantingSun49
May 22nd, 2016 8:59am
firstly evaluate why he broke up with you, is there any reason? Is something happening in his life? Was he trying to respect your life or keep you safe?
XConsolingAngelX
November 23rd, 2016 3:44am
Usually when we break up you decide not to talk to one another. And over a long period of time you both can either decide to talk with another or not. So for the time being because it's a very fresh break up he probably just wants to keep it at a distance for the time being
Ashley132
July 15th, 2016 10:12am
He wouldnt be ignoring you, he would just be needing time to think. Once he's ready to talk he will.
colourfulUnicorns83
May 17th, 2016 8:14pm
All people deal with breakups differently. Some people like to handle the emotions and pain on their own so they will isolate themselves, others will talk about it. He may be trying to process everything on his own.
dropwithus
February 15th, 2017 4:20am
He might need some time to cope with the breakup. Or he simply just needs some space, some time to himself.
Anonymous
March 26th, 2017 8:50pm
He may be stressed out and sad you are not together. He probably loved you and maybe still does so he is mad. Ignore him and stop messaging him and maybe one day he will pick up his phone and have the courage to message you back.
Anonymous
July 24th, 2016 12:19am
You two broke up, you're not seeing each other, you're no longer in a relationship. Why would he purposely be looking for you to talk with?
simplisticmoon
July 16th, 2016 4:02am
He might be hurting as well, or maybe he is trying not to focus on what happened. Sometimes, space is best for people who need to heal.
Naturallyhappy00
July 15th, 2016 3:50am
He is probably ignoring you because e is hurt or upset in time he will get past these emotions the best thing to do is no contact
ASilentObserver
September 20th, 2017 2:47pm
Break up is an unpleasant event. It leave the hearts in pain. So, some avoid their ex to avoid more pain after seeing them, or find it difficult to deal with the ongoing emotion inside them, so prefer to stay away. So reasons could be many and it vary from person to person. It is better to ask rather than assume. If you feeling bad that he is ignoring you, probably speak with him and sort out it.
OnlyAhavah
July 5th, 2018 2:26pm
The opening of your heart and sharing it with someone is a very scary thing, but once you have to close it to someone it really hurts, just as you are hurting now. There are far too many people in this world who were not properly taught to deal with ending a relationship, understanding what closure is for and taking the time to heal themselves afterwards. It's much easier, is it not to just ignore all of these steps along with the person that you had to leave behind? I suspect that this may be the case for him. We all have our own set of beliefs and limitations with which we build the framework of our life, but as life's experiences come along that framework has to grown and change to meet those challenges. So don't be angry with him, just recognize that he is going through the same tough time you are, but he is resisting a growth opportunity. I've found in life that when I resisted growth opportunities they only came back again and again, but got harder each time. So pray for him that he will learn and not suffer any more than he has to so that he can move forward with his life. Peace and good luck!
CheeseandCrackers
July 3rd, 2016 5:13am
After a breakup, a lot of feelings can arise from both people involved. He may be feeling guilty, awkward, or just isn't ready to talk yet,
KleineHaschen
June 4th, 2016 7:26pm
Maybe he needs time, breakups are not easy and they bring to the surface a lot of emotions that should be dealt with in order to move on.
Supergirl94
June 16th, 2016 8:34am
Because he is hurting as well and may be trying to get through it just like you. And sometimes it feels to awkward or weird to be friends after being in a relationship, even if you agreed to be friends. He may not know how to be friends after your relationship. Or he may just need time to heal and then will start talking to you again when he feels he can be friends with you. It will just take time and healing to know where you will end up
Anonymous
November 18th, 2017 1:43am
Maybe he or she is tired of having relationships fail or having people disappoint them
Anonymous
December 13th, 2017 11:38am
Unfortunately, this could just be because he is trying to move on with his life. He might not be doing this to try to hurt you in any way even if it seems like it. Chances are, he's trying to take care of himself and learn how to live life without you in it.
Anonymous
June 2nd, 2016 11:24pm
He may be ignoring you because he is still coming to terms with what has happened in the relationshop
Sunshine201
February 23rd, 2017 11:02am
Everyone has its own way of behaving after a break up, some persons just choose to be friends even after break up and some want to have no contact with their ex, that's why they deliberately ignore the ex, they might have certain hurtful or pent up feelings for that person .
wonderousWhisper18
August 27th, 2016 3:44pm
may be he is angry and dont want to talk at the moment give him time or may be he want to move on and dont want any communication
skylerraber1234
August 11th, 2016 4:55pm
After a breakup men usually feel guilt. They know how much they meant to you and so they feel bad and guilty from breaking it off. Also, some men don't really feel the affects of it until later when us ladies already moved on.