I have no friends in high school or college. What should I do?
Last Updated: 06/30/2020 at 9:17pm
Amy Justice, BS, MA, LCMHC
Licensed Professional Counselor
My passion is to help people overcome feeling "stuck" in unhealthy patterns by facilitating real, healthy changes through self-discovery and practical applications.
Top Rated Answers
It's normal to have trouble finding friends in places where your interests may not align. School is a second place (home is the first). If you're having trouble finding friends in a second place, try a third place, like a community centre, club, gaming space, etc. Go find a thing you love to do, and you'll find other people who love it too.
If you do not have friends in the places you go, you should try joining a club or take acting classes. Art classes and yoga will also introduce you to other people. Find what you enjoy and makes you happy, be confident and people will be drawn to you. Also understand that just because you do not have any friends does not mean there is something wrong with you. Some of the most intelligent thinkers in history were anti-social and had no friends!
Finding new social groups is a great way to meet people and make friends. This could be a club, religious organization, student committee, or any other gathering where there are other people who are interested in the same things you are. Once you meet someone who seems interesting, simply strike up a conversation. Ask them what brings them there and what their interests are. You will probably have at least one thing in common, and you can build from that. The easiest way to build a friendship is to find common ground. There are many people out there like you, in the same position as you, and they would love to be your friend.
It's normal to feel lonely and insecure in throughout school. Whether you realize it or not, many people including myself, all experience these feelings at least once in their educational journey. Don't be afraid to step up and be the person that initiates the first conversation with a classmate. Explore student communities! I know it can be hard but chances are, you'll feel so much better after getting out of your shell, reaching out to others, and making close connections. Most importantly, just be true to yourself. Don't feel pressured to conform to the people you're surrounded with. Just let your natural personality show and there's bound to be someone who will embrace you for it.
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