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How can I overcome anxiety if I can't talk to a therapist or my own doctor?

300 Answers
Last Updated: 01/15/2022 at 10:26pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Lauren Abasheva, LMHC

Licensed Professional Counselor

A sex positive, and kink knowledgeable therapist with an open mindset and a clear understanding that we are all different.

Top Rated Answers
November 21st, 2016 11:30pm
It's time to get creative! I suggest you find the core of your troubles - what do you find worrying about the most? If you need an outlet I suggest you express yourself through music, art, writing, blogging etc. If you are unhappy with yourself or your life I suggest you work everyday to find something you're grateful for If you're fearful for the future I suggest you write a list of your strengths, weaknesses, goals and how you're achieve them - having stability could ease your fears Being extra organised or prepared can make you feel more ready for new environments
December 4th, 2016 3:26pm
So sorry you feel this way, i too have the same problem due to trust issues. It can feel very restricting but i have noticed that if i write down my thoughts either on pen and paper or my phone..the release of expressing my thouhts and fears through writing really helps..i feel as if someone is listening in a way (i know that sounds weird but im not the best at explaining in detail) it also saves me the trouble of feeling any regret for actually speaking to someone as i normally feel like i shouldnt have opened up to certain people in my life. I suggest you try it sometime, literally write whatever word or expression that comes to mind. Be honest and let it all out, it really has helped my anxiety and feel slightly more in control..hope this helped and all the best!
January 8th, 2017 8:23am
Anxiety is usually caused by being afraid of something. Try identifying what causes you to be scared in this time of your life. Is there anything you can do to make it go away? If it is something that can't be helped, know that this is okay and normal. Talk to a friend or your parent and just have them listen. Or you can use 7 cups, and make it a routine to tell us what you're feeling. If you're not up to that, you can always write down what you feel. It's okay to talk to yourself sometimes. :)
January 8th, 2017 10:05am
Firstly, just think what is your anxiety about? By therapist information you tell is confidential, therapist can only speak with the third person if you are harming yourself or somebody else. With looking therapist is important to give yourself a time and look on this as a new experience in life learning something new and helping yourself. Anxiety is nothing strange especially if it is hard for you to trust people and if it is something really personal. And therapist is always in clients interests to help you as good they can. Sometimes it is good to read were this therapist is specialized, as about doctors to get the best help for you. I hope I could help you a little! There is lot of good doctors and therapist out there just try different ones and find the one you feel the best with. Have a good day! S.
January 19th, 2017 9:57am
I've never had good experiences with therapists or psychiatrists (probably because I live in Japan, where the lack of sufficient mental health care is notorious), so naturally I work on my problems alone. I don't tell my friends either because mental health issues are a bit of a "taboo" so to speak; it's just not smart to talk about it. (Isn't it a wonder why there are so many people who commit suicide here?) What I do is, I do everything I possibly can to try and help myself. I read a lot of self help books. I research on a lot of mental health care treatment that I can do myself (like CBT, some books come with exercises you can do by yourself). Hell, I even became a listener on this site and utilised the training material offered here to make sense of my own feelings and what I can do about them. Eat three meals each day, sleep at the right time. Do the basic human stuff properly because this can make such a big difference and it can give you the energy to help you deal with anxiety. As a last note: I refuse to stay "sick" because others won't or can't help me. It's precisely because others won't help me that I want to get better. And I will. The "need" for dependence on others can sometimes (SOMETIMES, not always) be an illusion. The struggle can be overwhelming, but know that you have the power to improve your well being. That it is not all in the hands of others. That if you don't have friends it doesn't mean you will never get better. That if there is no therapist or doctor, your anxiety will never go away. Just take your time, work through things at your own pace. There is no rush.
January 19th, 2017 4:31pm
Find someone you can trust, like a friend or family member, and talk to them about it. If you don't have anyone you can talk to about it, then maybe try writing it down in a diary. Write down how your anxiety makes you feel, the things that trigger it, and what helps alleviate it. Recognizing these things and having self awareness are the first steps to managing your anxiety.
February 1st, 2017 6:12am
Try taking deep breaths. Inhale in for 5 seconds and exhale slowly, there's no certain amount of time that you need to exhale for. Repeat this 3 times. This calms down your parasympathetic nervous system which is in charge of bringing down your heart rate among other things.
February 1st, 2017 8:42am
You can try to contact the listeners in this organization. They are always willing to help. Also you could try talking about your feeling with your friends or do relaxing exercises to feel calmer. Once you feel more relaxed you can start thinking about the source of your anxiety to try to improve your situation
February 3rd, 2017 9:47pm
You can try to avoid things that will trigger your anxiety and here is the guide that could help you.
February 7th, 2017 7:10am
You can overcome anxiety by trying breathing exercises, it may also be handy to have a stress ball to fidget around with or even getting crystals that help calm or your own charm and bringing it with you can help remove any nervous energy.
February 26th, 2017 4:36am
That is and can be a hard one. Try practicing what you want to say to your therapist/doctor ahead of time. Try writing things down that you would like to ask or talk about. And know that having anxiety seeing your therapist/doctor is very normal for many. One thing to is doing mindfulness or something you enjoy doing before your visit. Good luck and know one baby step at a time.
March 8th, 2017 2:17pm
Had the exact same problem. The trick is to let someone else make the appointment for you. And one day before going to the doctor, get a good night rest, play your fav game, watch your favourite movie. Asking someone to accompany you is a great plus as well. Just need to take a step into the doctor's office and the doctor will help you from there
March 8th, 2017 5:50pm
If you find it hard to talk to someone an easy solution may be to write down how you are feeling explaining how anxious you are to at least get things started. Doctors and therapists are trained to deal with anxious patients the big step is that first appointment.
March 9th, 2017 2:16pm
Breathing exercises, meditation, physical activity and a balanced diet can be a very effective way to deal with anxiety and you stay healthy at the same time! Writing down the reasons and the situations you feel anxious and analysing them can help you find solutions to cope with your anxiety. When I find it difficult to talk to someone, I count from 3 to 1 in my head then immediately do it without thinking about it. The physical stress linked to your anxiety can be used as a form of energy to get you going, in fact it uses the "fight or flight" system in your brain, the same chemicals in your body can be used to fight your anxiety or flee from anxious situation.
March 10th, 2017 1:05am
Many people find that if they take notes in with them that it soothes some of their anxiety. If you think notes or bullet points aren't enough. Try writing out exactly what you want to say to your doctor or therapist, word for word. Reading it out may feel a little awkward, but most providers will let you do this and appreciate the effort it took to get your points out. And its important to address your anxiety in talking to them, because if you can't talk to them, then they can't help you as effectively.
March 11th, 2017 8:01pm
With my anxiety I have found it very hard to talk to people. I rarely talk to anyone in real life with my anxiety. Talking to people online has truly helped me. I have gained so many friends who have gone through the same emotions that I have gone through. I have found that people online are more helpful than people in real life. As I am saying though, this may not be the case for everyone. If you don't feel comfortable talking to people in real life, find some people online. As you can see on this website there are online therapists, doctors and so many others that can help you. I hope this response has helped.
March 15th, 2017 5:21pm
It sounds like you already know the first step! If you are having trouble talking to a therapist or a doctor because of your anxiety, then set that as your goal! Take small steps to work your way up to it. For example, if I am terrified to talk to a doctor but I am able to talk to a friend, then I will start by talking to a friend. Then more and more and more until I finally feel like I am confident enough to go to someone higher up, Even if you have to start from just text messages, start with something doable! Now, if you are just not interesting in going to a doctor for other reasons, there are definitely ways to deal with anxiety on your own! It depends on the type of anxiety, for sure, and it is different for everyone. One of the tips is to create a mantra in your head, that overpowers those negative voices! For example, "I am strong". If you repeat your special mantra over and over in your head really loudly, then it really helps to block out the bad voices.
March 17th, 2017 10:06pm
Find somewhere quiet, close your eyes and listening to your breath can calm your mind and body. Listen to it intently and breathe in and out slowly until calmness returns.
March 24th, 2017 3:24am
I find that taking small steps is the way to go. Make a goal of telling one trusted person in you life just a bit about how you are feeling and then work from there! Also if you feel comfortable talking to people here on 7 cups, that can be a great place to practice!!
April 1st, 2017 5:21am
It's perfectly understandable to be nervous when talking to a therapist. Opening up about your feelings is not easy. Perhaps while you adjust you can consider writing down your thoughts for your doctor to read, or maybe just having something to read off of will help. Your doctor should be very understanding of this, and if they are truly the right doctor for you, you will start to become more comfortable around them. Good luck. :)
April 6th, 2017 2:55pm
If you can't talk to a therapist or doctor right at the moment, start to process those feelings & create a good support network. Recognising when you are anxious & why can really help in first managing anxiety, especially if you are feeling particularly overwhelmed. From there, learning what helps most in those situations for you and how to incorporate these into everyday life will definitely set you on the right path. There are guides & recommendations on coping mechanisms as well as forums to ask what might be good options to start with.
April 9th, 2017 5:00am
A therapist may be the best help in dealing with anxiety, but there are other resources available. Talking with anyone who cares can help -- and 7 Cups is a great place to start that. There are therapists available on-line, through 7 Cups or elsewhere, if that might be an option. There are also plenty of books and on-line resources available for dealing with anxiety, too. The important thing is to not give up. There are always options, and people who care.
April 9th, 2017 6:46am
Talk to your friends or family or use the 7 cups anxiety guide. Talking things out can help immensely.
April 12th, 2017 2:06pm
Just take it slow. Anxiety benefits a lot from exposure, which seems like a paradox since it's the very exposure that makes you have anxiety. But even if it feels like it's not getting better, over time it does. If it helps, try writing out what you want to say instead. That's what I did with my therapist. She knew I had trouble talking so she gave me a notepad during out meetings that I could write out what I was thinking. It really worked for me.
April 20th, 2017 5:19pm
There are exercises to help decrease anxiety. Breathing exercises are one of them. You can also look into mindfulness exercises, too. Another thing that could help you work through your anxiety is physical exercise,
May 12th, 2017 12:32am
For me, it helped to find an exercise that I enjoyed. I do yoga very regularly and find great joy in it. I also like to write things down. Putting emotions on paper and giving them a name that seems separate helps me so much!
May 14th, 2017 6:59am
building a relationship with your therapist or dr can and will take time. start small with normal conversation and ease yourself into a trusting enviorment
May 26th, 2017 3:35am
One of my favorite things to do when I have an anxiety attack is called grounding. You pick out 5 things you can see, 4 things you can touch, 3 things you can hear, 2 things you can smell, and 1 thing you can taste. This technique had really helped me to calm down and take control of my anxiety.
June 8th, 2017 3:51pm
Anxiety can be a very complex issue to deal with. It can often refrain you from talking to those, like doctors or therapists, that can help you. One way to help overcome anxiety, first of all, is to identify what makes you feel anxious. For example, talking to strangers or walking to the shop. Next of all, think of small ways to provide comfort to yourself in these moments. For example, saying comforting phrases to yourself or talking to a loved one as you complete your challenging event. Often or not, small changes like this, over time, makes a great difference.
June 15th, 2017 12:34pm
Anxiety usually occurs when you are overwhelmed, or continuously running worrisome thoughts through your mind. The inability to take action, or having to delay the action, often causes the anxiety to go into overdrive. Anxiety subsides when given a definite repititve task to focus on. In my personal experience, I found making small pieces of repititive doodles very soothing. It would take my mind off my worry, and help me focus on something without requiring thinking. Pick a paper and black pen. Start by making a large shape within 2 inches by 2 inches, could be a circle, square, triangle. Dont worry about perfection. Choose a doodle - short straight lines, small circles, waves. Fill up the shape with that repititve doodle. Focus on the lines you are drawing, and deliberately draw each stroke. As you continue, you will observe your mind go off your thoughts and focus on the doodle. Make as many shapes as you like, overlap them if you like. Do it for as long as it takes for your anxiety to subside for that moment. ~ And always here to help :) Reach out to me if you have any questions