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How to forget my one-sided love?

178 Answers
Last Updated: 06/09/2022 at 5:02am
How to forget my one-sided love?
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Lauren Abasheva, LMHC

Licensed Professional Counselor

A sex positive, and kink knowledgeable therapist with an open mindset and a clear understanding that we are all different.

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
July 18th, 2020 8:43am
I forget my one-sided love by reminding myself that I deserve someone that will reciprocate the love I have for them. I am worthy of someone that feels the same. It is a waste of time to dwell on someone that does not feel the same, therefore, I try not to give them too much of my time or energy. First, I acknowledge and accept how I feel. It is normal to experience this. Then, I focus on my hobbies, passions, and spend time with my loved ones- the people that actually love me back. It might be helpful to start talking to other potential partners (when you think it is time, but don't dwell on the one-sided love too much). Throughout this time, I am kind to myself because it feels horrible to not have someone reciprocate the love you have for them, but it is normal. I remind myself that I am worthy of someone that will value and love me.
safeshoulder2CryOn
July 26th, 2020 2:21pm
Many of us are unwittingly lulled into unrequited or one-sided Love. Often this happens when we are needy and desperate. However, if one party are unwilling to reciprocate, it leads to an unhealthy, emotionally absent partner. It is hurtful with the one you love is emotionally unavailable to you. Therefore it is best to go in separate ways since there is no commonality towards building the relationship. If you are on different paths, it indicates a disparity in attitude which would be difficult to rectify in the long term. Adopt an objectivity and optimism in such a flawed relationship. Let go of one-sided love and be positive in seeking the right one. Second best just wont do. Seek your soulmate not temporary mates as lovers. Trust your inner feelings. If something doesnt feel right, it probably isnt meant to be.Let it go.
Rabbit033
July 29th, 2020 1:23am
This is a hard thing to do for many people. Love is one of the strongest emotions we'll ever get to experience. Letting go to one-sided love can be especially difficult. In my experience, the two things that helped me most were time and rationalization. Remind yourself that the feelings weren't mutual. Remind yourself that the other person didn't care like you did. You need to accept this. It's not worth being with someone who doesn't want to be with you. Also keep in mind that time heals all. I have an ex who I was madly in love with. It's been several years since we were together. I can still kind of picture her in my mind and I can remember our past together but there is no longer emotion associated with her.
thoughtfulSoul2221
November 14th, 2020 8:11pm
Forgetting the feelings we have toward a special someone it's not easy. In fact, it's a process that will take some time, but with some effort and some patience we can get over it. I would suggest to do things that will make you not think about that person, with things I meant activities or hobbies of your preference that will keep your mind away from thinking about that person.There are only many things that one could do, it could be from a walk in the beach, to working out; to volunteer at any place that needs help, or to hang out with friends. Do anything that keeps you happy and stop you from thinking about your crush. Most important, talk aloud your feelings, speak with a friend about your situation or use a journal and write down what's on your mind. Hope this helps!
openEar107
November 23rd, 2020 3:18pm
Don't forget - learn from that experience - use you past to make your stronger and wiser . I believe we can use life experience to show us what works for us and what doesn't . Life is a great teacher. One sided love hurts and love shouldn't hurt like that - Love should make you feel good - Love builds you up - It makes life sunnier - You deserve more . Everyone deserves to love and be loved in return . No one should have to be with someone who does not really love them.
FlyLikeAButterfly1205
December 27th, 2020 4:03pm
I was in your shoes once upon a time trying to overcome by reading books, articles on google and motivational videos. so i can give u things to do I don't know if these will help you out, but they did for me. 1. Tell Them : No matter, what will happen just tell them about how you feel. Personally 2. Don't push yourself too hard 3. Write on the blank space : There may be moments like flashbacks of him/her in the middle of a night around 2am , memories of how you felt his/her presence ,how you watched him/her breathing air around you, conversations ,laughter, and everything that you miss or feel resonating about him/her. Just find a notebook or apps like OneNote and write down everything arranging into a poem or story or journal. After a year or later, if you find time to read them, you will be surprised to see that you've grown stronger. 4. Don't harm yourself : I never did nor I want you to hurt yourself . Your biological body is worth more than the finest of best AI robots or heavenly riches of Earth. And the person who doesn't love you will not love you even if you die or harm yourself. They might end up having grief. And I don't think you'll be happy to see them sad or crying
Anonymous
January 2nd, 2021 1:01am
You don’t have to forget them. I mean loving someone is quite a big deal. I think trying to forget is quite humanly impossible especially if they meant so much to you so instead you should try to work through the pain you feel for it being a one-sided love. Why do you want to think about them less? I think this is sometimes similar to just going through a breakup so I would think of the reasons why things are not working out or really face the facts. “This person does not love me and so I deserve to find love that is two-sided.”
Anonymous
January 27th, 2021 7:53am
Just try to accept their feelings. be aware of your emotions and keep it in control and try to distract yourself from thinking that. Its really hard to forget your love but the most important thing is you deserve love and we cant force anyone to give you that. so just start to love yourself and keep one thing in mind that you really deserve love and one day that love will find you. but it only happens when you start to accept your feelings and when you love yourself!!. Just enjoy the life and feel this nature. try to understand.
SoftTouch7777
January 27th, 2021 1:19pm
Give Yourself Permission To Grieve. When you are faced with an unreciprocated love, it can really hurt. ... Distract Yourself. ... Reach Out. ... Love Yourself And Practice Self-Care. ... Recognize Their Pain Too. ... Pick Your Distance. ... Set Big Goals
SirenSymphony21
January 28th, 2021 12:40pm
Forgetting your one-sided love can be a difficult process. Because you are so much attached to the person. What I do is to talk as much as I can about the experience I had with that person. If it was negative that is. I assume that this is the reason why you wanna forget them or your love towards them. If not, then also it is applicable. You can write a letter to them, stating how you feel, but don't send the letter. Keep that to yourself. This is just to help you vent. I hope the answer was helpful.
mariag807
February 26th, 2021 12:50pm
One-sided love can be mentally and emotionally draining. In my experience, it is easy to forget one-sided love by refraining from giving it to the non-reciprocal person, and rather giving it to myself. To love myself; my mind, body and soul. I have learned that people come and go, love and romance comes and goes. The only person who is permanent in my life is myself. That is the most important relationship that I had to improve. To forget about them, I had to focus on myself! Become the best version of myself, cultivate self-love, and redirecting that one-sided love to the ones in my life who do truly love me; my friends and family members.
danniemperor2012
April 11th, 2021 6:59pm
Dealing with a failed relationship is not an un-common thing these days. In the first place you had the courage to love someone even without knowing it may work well or not, so you should be able to deal with the second part as well! You can't run away as such from failures. Learn to walk through it. Listen my friend failing in your love is surely not the end of the world. There are better things waiting for you in the horizon. Numerous ways are there to get out of love failures in theory. But in reality the task is always difficult. Upvote the answer if you like it!!!
Anonymous
April 14th, 2021 7:33am
Hi there~ I know how hard it is to have a one-sided relationship with someone. But I would encourage you to not beat yourself up just to fall in love. Love is not something to be forgotten. It is a feeling that can't be forgotten. And it's not your fault that you fell in love with someone who couldn't give you that love back. It is a human emotion that you felt or feel and there is nothing wrong with that. A lot of times we think, we are at fault for loving someone and call ourselves the reason for 'our own sufferings' when that is not the case at all. It is the disappointment that you feel when you don't get the love back. Well now how do I move on? It is easy. It is to accept the fact that you did nothing wrong. You did the absolute best thing you could ever do and that is to feel the love. Once you do that things simplify in your favor. You realise that it was never your fault to love and the fact that nobody needs to force themselves to accept feelings. In this way you learn how to respect yourself and the other person who is involved.
originalFaith74
May 8th, 2021 6:28pm
You can forget your one-sided love by embracing it as a part of you that is so generous which can allow you to love someone selflessly. Why would you want to forget such strong quality of yours? It just adds up to how lovely you are. You are just amazing. Develop a good routine full of habits that captivate you. Surround yourself with lots of good people, who can make you "feel good about yourself"(its important). And allowing yourself all the time you need to move forward to next chapter in life. It is not easy, yet possible. Only thing required is Perseverance. Allow yourself baby like sleep. Cry when you feel like, eat when you feel like, be regular at work/study, maybe skip on a really bad day, talk to listeners, friends, family, watch good movies, play, laugh, do excercises, go for walk. Even 3 activities would do great to start with. Embrace your growth in you sweetheart.
sweetWriting46
May 16th, 2021 4:21pm
It might be difficult to forget one sided love. Still one has to realise that there nothing outcome will be there with the one sided love except hurting one self for not being loved by the person on the other side. In the end it is not a love as the person on the other side is not ready to accept the love which is of no use. Thinking of this love all the time yields nothing but pain in the end and hurting oneself. The best thing is to realise that this is not live and try to engage one self in different activities.
braveBlueberry607
May 22nd, 2021 12:28pm
One-sided love, we have all been there. Rather than forgetting, it is important to remember that it is a great feeling to love, we love and if it is not reciprocated we move on to love someone else a little more. Loving someone who does not love us back is nothing personal. It is not about you, it is about them. They may be dealing with something of their own. As the saying goes, it is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all. Because in the end, all we are left with is hope.
Anonymous
July 22nd, 2021 6:04pm
Give Yourself Permission To Grieve. When you are faced with an unreciprocated love, it can really hurt. so try not to have a mindset which only tells you to move on without allowing you to feel the hurt first. Once you feel like you have let the hurt sink in , try distracting yourself. Practice self care as much as possible. Engage in activities that bring you in contact with other people. Try cultivating a hobby. Maybe distance yourself a little from them at least for some time so you get space to think about what you actually want.
Anonymous
July 25th, 2021 7:32pm
Frankly speaking, it's hard to forget your love, whether it's one-sided or two-sided. Only thing that is do-able is accept the fact, meet new people, explore yourself, enhance your talents/capabilities, self-care, and most of all, love yourself. Once we start accepting the fact, we will eventually get out of it...even if we don't stop loving that person, we'll be able to live with the love for them in our self. Focus on yourself, give time to yourself, understand yourself better. Focus on your career because your careering is going to be with you for the rest of you life.
MindfulListener82
September 5th, 2021 4:57am
Personally, for myself I’d sit down and remind and clarify for myself what my values are and my needs and wants in a relationship and partner. Probably on paper. Then I’d think about what do I want my life when it comes to relationships and love. I’d consider and write down any ways in which their behavior, and mind with them, has supported or interfered with what I value and need in a partner. I’d probably make a pros and cons list even for the good and bad of staying with the person. That would probably give me my answer and make it easier to walk away.
Believeinspiredream
October 8th, 2021 1:06pm
Take time for yourself and try and do something that you are going to enjoy and love everyweek. For example, take baths, walking, gym, sports, journalling, reading, video games, journal anything that will keep you busy and then soon you will fogot. Its a hard process but life will get busy and every day as you move on the person you are thinking of will get less and less and less. You are strong, you are brave and loving something/ someone to much is never ever a bad thing, If you can get some therapy that really helped me.
AdmirableTree
December 15th, 2021 10:54pm
One-sided love is all love. When I love, I think fondly of another person. Beyond that, I believe that is what is known as 'greed'. I had a friend as a kid who was my 'everything'. He told me to make a racist joke and act inappropriately in public, and I listened. I didn't blame him in the least for that. When he told me he didn't want to be my friend I felt devastated. I think of him until this day. Is that love? Do I need to forget? No matter my answer, what he did and what I did are done. I remember the past, and so it hurts, I remember the past, and so I try to 'act normal'. What you carry with you into the future is a choice you make everyday in what you do. Because of that memory, I am different.
yournewfriend22
December 16th, 2021 2:25am
Love is one of the strongest emotions. So forgetting it can be challenging. However, there will be times when we must move on from a relationship. If I were giving my best friend advice to this question, I'd say, when you think of the one-sided love, cherish the good times. You know the ones that made you smile and laugh. And then channel those same "giddy" feelings back towards yourself. Always remember, you deserve love and you can always receive it, should you be its provider. Life is precious, so engage in sports, activities and gatherings that help you feel great about yourself and increases the love you feel within. Love is one of the strongest emotions. The right one will find you. Until then, you just hold down the fort :)
Anonymous
January 13th, 2022 2:22pm
One sided love is beautiful and terrible. It's pure and innocent but it cuts your heart in pieces. You always hope that it's mutual. That somewhere your love is shedding their tears for you. That you are loved by them. But when it doesn't happen, you break. It stings, hell it burns! But there's nothing you can do, the scars have to fade naturally. Spend time with your friends. Quit staring at his pictures. That is all you can do. You will have to let go. And it will not be easy, at all, but you will be free again and find the love that deserves you.
HappinessIsAFirefly
January 14th, 2022 5:03am
No one is perfect, even the people you love. Identifying and reminding yourself of a person's negative qualities (even if they're just little things) can help you stop idealizing them and, for lack of a better phrase, start seeing the other fish in the sea. Acceptance will also play a big part. That is, accepting that, even though you love them, they do not feel the same way about you and you cannot have them in a romantic capacity. Get out and meet new people, build friendships, and reinforce your sense of self-worth. You deserve more then them, anyway.
Anonymous
January 21st, 2022 11:30pm
It is hard to forget anything that you love because you put that time and effort in. This is somebody that you deeply cared about. Those memories and thoughts don't just go away overnight. However, remember that you deserve that love right back! Try to focus on loving things that do love you back. You can spend more time with friends and family that care about you. You can focus on hobbies. Most importantly, remember to love and care for yourself. Also, don't feel like you need to forget within a certain time. Give yourself compassion to take the time that you need to move on.
RosesEmpress
February 1st, 2022 3:18pm
RosesEmpress here, welcome and glad that you reached out. I understand that you want to forget about your “one-sided love”. Sometimes we ask the wrong questions. And that is ok. There are many ways to get to the truth and so many many questions. Maybe it is not about forgetting but about remembering how to focus and develop a relationship with ourselves. Therefore, either its about: “how do i forget, or how do i distract or how can i get out of this situation “ the answer remains the same. Focus on your relationship with yourself. How would your best day look like? How would your best date look like? Take yourself on a date and see how that feels. Get to know yourself. Be aware of your thoughts so you can change the focus. You are in control, you can do it!
Anonymous
February 18th, 2022 4:04am
Dive into distractions. Practice self-care. Let yourself be upset. Reach out to friends and family members.Be honest. Explain why you've decided to end the relationship. ... Talk to a therapist. Working with a mental health professional can help you recover from the breakup and examine your own role in relationship imbalance. ... Take time to recover. Look forward to the future. Set goals for your next relationship. Cut contact with the other person. Put yourself back out there. One-sided love is basically a feeling of loving someone who doesn't feel the same for you. In short, one-sided love can be referred to as an infatuation or any kind of attraction but as well as this is true love too. This feeling is for someone who does not reciprocate your feelings.
Anonymous
June 9th, 2022 5:02am
Remember you are not alone and this happens to everyone. The only thing which will help you to heal is "distance". Try to stay away from whatever belonged to him/her. After doing this for more than expected days you might still not forget mentally. Sometimes, it's such a bad experience that people go in the wrong direction. But you can do it. He/she left cause he/she was not meant to be so have faith that things will get perfect even though everything which you did for them might have went unnoticed, unappreciated. I wish you the best.