I'm dating someone who has been cheated on. What should I do?
306 Answers
Last Updated: 04/26/2022 at 3:52pm
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Top Rated Answers
Take things slow,build trust and heal with that person. Because they are emotional torn and support from you will build a trusting relationship between you two
Anonymous
April 27th, 2018 7:56pm
You should talk to them, don’t hide anything from them as they might think that it might happen again
If you're dating someone who has been cheated on, give them reassurance. Let them know they are loved & that the past does not define the future. If the love is real they will feel that. But you need to show them love in the way they feel secure in your relationship.
Always let them know that they are the only one in your life and comfort them. It might sound silly, but it goes a long way.
Don’t cheat on them. Reassurance is key, show love with actions not words. If you don’t want to be with them, let them know straight out. Love and care for them, they can be sensitive, don’t do anything to break their trust.
Anonymous
May 23rd, 2018 12:39am
They’re probably going to be quite insecure and potentially paranoid. Be cautious of their feelings but don’t stop being yourself
Anonymous
May 23rd, 2018 9:09am
make sure they have your trust and that you have theres. that is the most important thing in a relationship.
You should be yourself and love that person the way you know best and treat that person the same way you would treat any other person that you have dated. For them to trust you and be completely open with you, you need to be yourself.
Building up steady trust is key. Since they have lost trust before, they will be on guard, even if it's to a different person like you. Confide things in them when they tell you things. Do favors for them and don't shower them with compliments but still occasionally compliment them. Showering makes you look suspicious, like you are trying to get something out of them.
Be open to listening to their story. Tell them you want to understand how it effected them so you learn what things will make them feel like you are doing the same. people who have been cheated on will usually assume it will happen again. You need to show them that you will not be that person. and work and compromise with them on boundaries and making each other feel secure and loved
Earn their trust gradually by reassuring them that you will remain loyal, but of course actions speak louder than words. Perhaps you can let them meet your friends and those who are close to you so that way they know who you hang out with when you're not hanging out with your partner.
Set time aside to spend time with her/him, let her/him know how much you love them and tell him/her that you wouldn't hurt them like that.
I've too been cheated on and the best thing you can do is let that person go because 9 times outta 10, the relationship was either draining or toxic due to arguments that mostly led up to the cheating and/or afterwards. Take time to gain the strength back with on you mentally and physically. Learn to love yourself over again and watch someone will come to love you better than the person who cheated on you
You should be patient and act carefully. Respect him/her because of a bad experience, not give reason to doubt your fairness.
Be kind to them. Best thing would be to not bring up the past in important conversations and be mindful of the things you say.
Anonymous
June 30th, 2018 2:06pm
Comfort them and make them know that every guy is bad and that you'll never do the same. Put yourself in their shoes
Treat them with care. Be prepared for jealousy and a very close very clingy boyfriend or girlfriend. Reasure them often. And just hold them close for a LONG time as often as you can.
Let them know that you won’t do the same. If they can trust you as you trust them they can be more involved in the relationship.
Nothing. Be present, be caring and patient but do not try to walk on eggshells around them in order to make sure they don`t get to the idea that you might be cheating on them. If they have trust issues, they shall work on them, you did not cheat on them, and you cannot take fault for their hurt.
Try to be understanding. They may be insecure at first. Give them time and love and they should feel better in time.
When dating someone, an awesome quality is to observe and learn. This quality helps you make a circle of comfort around the person you are dating. While you observe ways to make and keep your date happy, you also try to observe how personal/frank your date is becoming with respect to sharing either his/her weakness or any event of the past. Neither do you have to be too desperate to know every detail in a single go, nor have to be aloof enough to not even bother asking things. Make a balance, and observe reactions from your date. Let your date get comfortable in reveal things by him/herself. Unless that happens, probably your date does not want an old nerve to strike again. So be calm and have patience.
Also, since your date has been cheated and you know about it, he/she might be analytic or cautious towards you. Let it come, and still keep calm and patience. It pays. Remember, for many, old wounds take time to heal. So either we can turn scratchers of the wound, or, we can mould ourselves to become healers instead :)
Know that no one deserves to be cheated on and just support them. If they need reassurance, then provide that for them. That establishes stability within your relationship.
Understand! Understanding, empathy and words of care are the only things required in this phase. Love has energy and this energy comes to the person in destructive way when one gets cheated. Our compassion serves to counter the negative energy and makes the person feel better :-)
They’re going to be very suspicious and nah even accuse of you doing things you haven’t done. This is normal. They’re probably very insecure and that’s ok, just constantly reassure them even when they don’t ask
Being in a relationship means you should learn to trust each other and to build trust, it's not an overnight process.. it need times and commitment to do it. The more you trust each other, the stronger your relationship are..
Someone who has been cheated on, means he/she is feeling super insecure.. so what you both guys should do is to build trust. Building trust need both parties' effort.. so for this relationship to work out, both of you should commit to learn more about each other and build trust together :)
Try not to dwell on either of your past history. Be open and honest. If you think that you might stray, walk away.
be patient as they may have a lot of anxiety about being cheated on. As someone that has been cheated on and is currently in a relationship I found it difficult through the first few months to trust again but after opening up to him about these trust issues i have realised that i can trust him it just takes time
Hard to say, but if you had been cheated on, you must recover the self-esteem you shall have before starting a relationship. A new person is a new story, don't be conditioned by your past, most likely you're the one that should condition the past learning from it.
Keep the lines of communication open, and be as transparent as you can. Clear, honest communication is best way to let them come to trust you.
Be honest about what you want in the relationship, don't bring it up unless they want to talk about it. Make sure you know they have your trust and give them a reason to trust you, because that's the biggest thing with being cheated on. The trust you held was broken. It can be scary and hard for them to completely trust again. Be patient.
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