Spying on ex's social media - since my breakup I can't stop from monitoring. Is that okay?

What do you think is it okay? I know that you want him/her to be happy and move-on but don't do anything that will going to hurt you at the end of day. Time is a great healer and one can overcome if he/she can put his mind to. Try to indulge any other activity that will help you in not remembering him/her. Coupe up with your friends and enjoy each moment of life as we have less time at the end of each day. Travel to the other side of the city, country and explore. it will help you explore new things and to interact with new people as well.

It's not okay to stalk anyone. How would you feel if she did the same to you without telling? Would it feel great? Isn't it better to move on than getting stuck at her and living someone elses life?

It is very understandable, however, not necessarily helpful for you. Spying indicates and interest and most likely a willingness to get back with your ex. However, simply spying and unavoidably coming up with different assumptions is not where true happiness lies. First and foremost putting someone else as your priority number one does not indicate a healthy relationship with the self as we should be in the centre of our lives, the drivers of our life-mobil. In the case of willingness to reverse the situation, one may be better off talking openly in a heart-to-heart conversation. If the spying stems from curiosity then one should question why this curiosity exists. My best advice to any addictive behaviour is to ask yourself the question if you would recommend a person who you truly love to do this. The chances are that if you are advising a loved one you would avoid recommending harmful in one way or another activities. Then try loving yourself and give your best advice to your favourite person - yourself. You deserve the best.

if you feel that its okay and you feel good by doing this then its okay. but dont let that person hurt you in anyway or you hurt your self . that would not be nessasary if you think that its is not fine and for any reason this thing is hurting you more then you should move on try to be strong and try to find a better person which will make you happy and make u fall in love

If you are doing this you are probably a little jealous and are still getting over the breakup. Try to focus on your own life and forget about your ex. You go girl!

At first, it's okay it is very natural and i would do it too. Though, it is not healthy to do it forever, at some point you should stop and move on, it's okay if you can't because that is where you can talk to us for some help :)

that's not healthy. the only way you will find closure and the ability to move forward into a healthy relationship (when you are ready) is to find closure in letting go. If you continue to spy on your ex you're not allowing yourself the chance to heal and find closure.

No,because he will think that your stalking him and that is really really creepy so no. not O.K. at all

Its incredibly normal to do this after breakups. In today's world its hard not to get away with the amount of social media options we have. I cant think of a person who hasn't monitored their ex's social media at some point. To answer your question, yes! Perfectly normal. For the sake of your well-being however it's best not to make a routine of this. It makes the process of getting over them last much longer than it need to.

I think the temptation is there. However, it is a bad habit that needs to be broken. I think it makes it difficult to move forward. Try blocking him. Remember the phrase "Out of sight, out of mind". Good Luck!

Not really, You are not letting yourself go from the past. Dont look back, you can only look forward.

It is normal, we all have been through this phase but what is important here is why do you want to monitor their activities. Seeing their pictures or statuses is only going to hurt you. Why do you want to hurt yourself? It is not the time to focus on what they are doing in their lives, you should try to keep the focus on yourself and move on in your life.

It's not healthy but I think everyone is guilty of doing that. If you feel yourself wanting to do it, do something else instead. You need to find distractions. Download a puzzle game on your phone or watch a funny video.

It is okay to be hurting, but becoming obsessive is not a good thing. Obsessiveness is an unhealthy habit to get into and will almost always result in you getting hurt again.

I feel that it isn’t okay nor healthy to do so. Spying is just a nice way of saying stalking. When you let go of the hurt and pain truly you won’t feel the need to spy!

At some point you will stop doing that but if you want to seriously move on you should stop doing it since it will hinder the process

although you may want to see whats been going on, you cant spend your life constantly checking up on someone who doesnt matter anymore. it wont get you anywhere

For some time I think it's quite normal, you've been involved with this person for some time and you want to know how that person is living after you. But it's healthy to look through it each time less and less.

If you want to move on then no in my experience, i don’t thibk it’s okay. It acts like a constant reminder of all that’s happened. We keep looking back. In order to move on we gotta break free of these habits. You know what they say “out of sight, out of mind”

I think people do this as a way to stay connected, but really, it's a reflection of the fact that you're not letting go and accepting the end of the relationship. It's not a very healthy way to behave, particularly if it goes on for any period, as it just signals an inability to move on with your life.

It is normal to do that- but you are only doing yourself more harm. Try to keep away from social media for a while after your breakup, or maybe just take a break; it'll clear your mind. Try to focus on the things that you love doing in life and think positive!

Completely okay. But if you are planning to get over your break up, you should stop from spying and move on.

No its not ok as they are now your ex and its none of your business and on top of that you're torturing yourself.

It's certainly normal to want to see how your ex is getting on. It could be out of jealousy that you don't want to see them with someone else, it could be anger that you don't want them to hurt another, clarity for the reasons why you broke up with them, or it could even just be habit from how much you're used to caring for them etc. However, it's not healthy. If the decision of the break up was final then you need to be able to function happily without them in your life. Time is the best healer for that but you need to be able to move on and live for yourself.

Sure, but the only one that's gonna get hurt is you. Spying on them doesn't bring you anything besides seeing their pictures or what they have to say. And one day you'll see something you don't like, that's just bound to happen, and you'll get yourself hurt because care about someone you should be forgetting.

Technically speaking, you can do whatever you want, but since the dynamics are very different now, it wil be considered stalking if he finds out. Also, stalking your ex prevents you from moving on from the relationship cleanly, and you might find yourself clinging on to it which is bad for your emotional well-being. I suggest you block him entirely and treat your relationship as a relic that you don't want to be reminded of. Treat you current situation as starting anew and look to the future as a blank scape.

Each breakup is unique and for this reason so is the 'correct' procedure on how to handle it. In my own experience the moment you decide to delete the numbers, remove the messages and block both yourself and your ex from being able to see each other on social media - you gain a huge about of control and momentum. At first, you may find yourself counting the days since you checked and wondering what you may be missing but ignorance is truly bliss! Slowly but surely by lack of exposure to your ex - you will begin to heal and move on without even realising.

In the beginning is okay, but if it has been going through longer, you might have some problems with missing affection and intimacy with somebody. Try to distract yourself with friends, studies, work, social life or hobbies. If the emotions are too overwhelming still, consider seeing a counselor or therapist.

It's not ok, for either of you. In my experience it only keeps the hurt going. Letting that go, the 'spying', is one step closer to letting yourself heal from that hurt.

That is completely normal to do! It is not easy to completely stop thinking about your ex right after a breakup, but it helps to reduce how often you monitor them!!