Spying on ex's social media - since my breakup I can't stop from monitoring. Is that okay?
306 Answers
Last Updated: 06/06/2022 at 1:11pm
★ This question about Breakups was starred by a moderator on 5/12/2016.
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Top Rated Answers
you know the answer.. is it helping you to move on or it's hurting your..you are the best exprats on you..choose the right path
It's definitely natural to see what your loved one is doing. Ex or not, it's okay. It is recommended that you do try to move on. It's not good to stay in the past :)
Anonymous
December 24th, 2015 4:09pm
I understand why youre doing that but you need to stop it. you wont be able to move on if you keep on doing that. it will hurt you more. find the courage to stop it soon.
Spying isn't wrong, although it blocks you from fully going through the moving on process, which can also prevent you from accepting the breakup and accepting change overall
Anonymous
December 25th, 2015 8:39am
Personally I understand why you would want to look but stalking them everyday is something I wouldn't want to do.
No, it's not okay, you need to go over breakup, but this is not the way you do it. You need to understand that you're no longer together and move on. Go out with your friends or find a new hobby, you can do whatever you want and it will get better, i'm sure abou that :)
Personally, I think it isn't but I am not one to judge since I've been in a similar situation. It has only made me more upset and broke my heart more than it was already broken. My best advice would be not to indulge
Anonymous
December 26th, 2015 4:55pm
It is indeed hard not to do so. But it may effect your progress of moving on and finding someone new.
If I say it's not okay you are still not gonna stop..by now you might have got it as habit but you should know the only thing that does to you is hurt..so it's better not to let something lost, haunt you for its broken purpose. .let go and so you will feel better and more alive.. bcoz it's not worth your time.. take care ☺
I do it. As long as you're not harnessing them I think it's ok. But you need to move on. Maybe it's you're self saying your not over him
If the cyber stalking has taken control, that's a huge sign that you're not ready to move on. Take some time to yourself to really reflect on the situation and figure out what you can do to break the cycle and put yourself in a healthier, happier place.
You should try not to monitor your ex's social media. You are trying to get over the person and still be happy with yourself
Anonymous
December 27th, 2015 8:54pm
No u have to stop .. Apparently u keep thinking of her and u should stop both them and keep yourself busy
If you wish to fully heal from a breakup there must be measures taken to fully let go so and process the breakup that you can be fully healed. Is lying in wait on the outside looking into this life that you shared letting go?
Anonymous
December 30th, 2015 2:24am
It's natural to be curious about what your ex is doing, how they might be feeling or who they are connecting with but monitoring their social media will only make you feel bad. Checking in once or twice is okay, but at some point you must move forward and that wont happen if you keep going back. Blocking them for a while may help.
I'm not exactly sure. All i do know is that it is definately normal, a lot of girls i know do that as well.
Why do you think you try to keep tabs on him? What are you looking to find on his profiles, best case scenario?
no it's not especially since you are not respecting others privacy even though they trusted you. since she/he's your ex you have nothing to do with their lives
Anonymous
December 30th, 2015 6:06pm
This is not unusual, but it may do more harm to your emotions, and cause a lot of anxiety or depression. Try to find ways to distract yourself, and friends to help comfort you and keep you away from being able to go online
Anonymous
December 30th, 2015 6:47pm
Well i think that continually stalking your ex isn't going to help you move on, and i think that you know that. Maybe you just don't want to move on
Anonymous
December 30th, 2015 8:40pm
in my situation, i have actually done this. i think you should try not to. what if you see them with a different significant other? you will probably be shattered. i think it would be best for you not to stalk them and just block them. ive learned this because ive done it both ways.
We all do it for a while but it's best to move on. You make end up hurting worse if you fixate on someone too much.
Of course. People always have different ways of moving on, but of you are checking to see if they have say a new partner, maybe it suggest you aren't completley over them...
It's natural. However, you must admit to yourself that it's very harmful to do it. Whenever you get the urge, try to force yourself to do something else.
Anonymous
December 31st, 2015 8:51am
Yes that's okay,it happens with everyone just try to move on and then spying on your ex accounts would seem such a silly thing for you.
I did it for some time after my break up and occasionally still do. Depending on how obsessive you are about it and if it's helping you or not. My best guess is that you still have feelings and are looking for a way to make sure shes ok. But its best to stop before it gets out of hand.
As long as the other person does not experience discomfort in any way from you checking on his or her social media, I would not think too bad of it. You clearly are not over said person and need more time. However, to get over a person quicker it is most likely better to not remind yourself of that person too often.
Anonymous
January 1st, 2016 3:01am
It's okay but it's not a healthy way to move on. You need time and space try to distract yourself with other things like youtube, twitter or friends social media.
It's probably an unhealthy behavior. although I too sometimes do this. I would suggest blocking your EX on social media and getting as far away as possible from him.
That is not OK, because seeing it and comparing your life to theirs will only increase the pain that you feel when they move on. I would suggest blocking them, or removing yourself from facebook for a while so you do not feel the temptation. A goo;d way to feel better is to distract yourself with friends and hobbies!
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