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How to be good to yourself and to others?

178 Answers
Last Updated: 06/10/2022 at 5:58am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
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Elena Morales, LMHC

Licensed Professional Counselor

I believe silence creates a cycle. With empathic and collaborative therapy, we break the cycle. I help clients feel validated and supported passed anger, shame, and anxiety.

Top Rated Answers
calmingSalamander18
June 7th, 2018 3:03pm
It's important to always be kind to others, and generally we all know when we are being good to others. There's a little voice in the back of your head that tells you when you're doing something right or wrong. The thing that a lot of people forget to do is treat themselves how you treat others. If you look at yourself in the mirror, don't tell yourself that you look ugly. Would you say that to someone else? No. You deserve the same amount of respect and dignity that you give to other people. Just ask yourself: would I be friends with myself with the way I talk to myself? If not, then you need to change the way you think of yourself: you are incredible and you should respect that.
Anonymous
August 29th, 2018 4:27am
Its a good question, cause being good to our own self and to others is important to lead a happyt life. TO BE GOOD TO YOURSELF- you have to initially love yourself, take care of yourself, motivate yourself always whether the time is good or bad. Tell yourself to do hardwork so that you will strive unbound in your future. Be good to you, find your hobbies and just embrace your qualities . Tell yourself about the mistakes you have done and your faults, yet do not self harm, rather teach yourself to learn from the mistakes so that in future you will not face those mistakes ever. TO BE GOOD TO OTHERS- Care for the people who need love, affection and help. Stand for people who want support in emotional states. Do the amount of help that you can do, either mental support or if possible then to some extent financially too. When you are good to yourself, you will create positive vibes around yourself, and have good days, this will help others to get motivated as well, when they will see your success because you initially loved yourself and loved others as well. So be good to yourself and also to others, and lead your life in the best way ever.
mysteriousButterfly2020
June 17th, 2020 6:29am
Great questions! It is definitely one that each individual will answer differently. One thing for sure, is that it is extremely important to be good to yourself. Self-care is one example of taking care of yourself. Making sure you're mentally healthy is something that everyone needs to prioritize more. Being good towards others is also crucial. We need to treat all of those around us with kindness and respect. We are all human and each and every one of us deserves to be treated with dignity no matter what. To be good to others is to make sure that you are treating those around you in a way that you would want to be treated.
Greatlistener87
- Expert in Managing Emotions
June 23rd, 2016 3:57am
Treat yourself with respect, love and affection as you would to others. How you would want someone to treat you is how u should treat some1.
bubblingKermit2504
July 3rd, 2020 11:33am
In order to be good to others, we first must understand what it means to be good to ourselves. In order to be good to yourself, make sure that you allow yourself to forgive yourself. If you make a mistake, allow yourself to learn from that mistake and try not to dwell on it. If you realize that you've grown in an area, appreciate and acknowledge that growth. If you feel an emotion, allow yourself to feel that emotion before figuring out how to react or respond to it. To be good to others, consider how you'd want to be treated. Consider the emotions that the other person has and try to empathize.
Anonymous
June 7th, 2020 7:13am
Being good to yourself is not selfishness and you can be good to others only when you are good to yourself. You can be good to yourself by stop blaming yourself for everything, making yourself a priority, taking a stand for yourself, doing what you love and many more. You can be good to others by respecting them and their privacy. Talking politely to them because we don't know what they are currently going through. By actively listening to them and making them feel like they are heard. By being empathetic towards them and being more inclusive and amiable. :)
Snowball101
June 6th, 2020 10:54am
Hello! I hope you’re doing well. I think, I’m order to be good to other you have to be good to yourself. You can try self-care. Like having a day just doing what makes you happy. And as time goes by, you can manage it through time. Like taking at least 15 mins a day to look after yourself. Then you can try doing things for people that you would expect in return from them. Perhaps kind gestures like holding the door, saying they look lovely today, or even tell them that you’re here for them. I hope I helped you! Thank you for your time 😊
niceMonkey80
September 8th, 2018 9:03am
how to be good for yourself? self care. look after your health and emotions. set time aside to relax, maybe bath, use face masks, watch a movie. be active, do exercise, eat healthily but also don’t feel pressured to exercise every day or eat healthily all the time. be your own personally hype girl. treat yourself like you’d treat your friends, compliment yourself, hype yourself up - treat yourself like a queen. how to be good to other? treat them like you’d want to be treated. be kind, try not to be mean or rude or short-tempered and, if you are, own up to it and apologise. just be the best you that you can be:)
caringdreamer94
June 21st, 2018 11:51am
To know that you are worthy of good things. To know that you deserve good things. By acknowledging the good in your life, you will find ways of extending that same spirit to others. Basically if you are to be kind or good-natured to others, you have to begin with yourself.
PeacefulFlute74
June 22nd, 2016 6:53pm
I think you have to have compassion and empathy for yourself first. When you develop that, you are able to feel compassion and empathy for others. And if you have that, being good to yourself and others comes naturally.
BunnieLuv
May 6th, 2018 9:26am
I can be good to others by doing simple nice things. Saying good morning and hello to loved ones and friends, giving smiles to strangers, helping old people cross the street, offering a cold drink to someone who has been under the sun are some of the examples you can do to others. Being good to yourself, on the other hand, is like treating yourself as a good friend of yours. Practice self-care and try to avoid toxicity... It does wonders! *bunnie beleafs in you*
Hanaa00
March 24th, 2019 9:46am
I’ve learned to be good to myself and others by first learning to love myself and to give myself needed time and space for growth. You only become truly good to yourself when you learn to appreciate your strengths and focus on them rather than analyze your flaws. We all have weaknesses, and that is okay. It is okay to not always have it all figured out. We must not let it affect the way we are, and what we hope to make out of our future. By learning self love, compassion and empathy, we nurture love for others too.
Joyfulsmile
April 25th, 2018 12:24pm
I think i will be good by being helpful and a positive person towards other people and that will help me being good to myself as well
ElizabethWasHere
June 10th, 2022 5:58am
Trust your emotions and listen to them, just as you would for any other person. It's hard to not get caught in the day to day of life and to take a step back to breathe and take time to acknowledge yourself and your own needs. Take time to listen to yourself and to others. Be kind to those around you and especially be kind to yourself, you would be surprised at just how helpful it is to give yourself small positive affirmations throughout the day. "you did a good job today" Give others praise and give it to yourself as well, you deserve it.
Anonymous
May 15th, 2020 1:19am
It is important to treat yourself and others kindly, everyone is fighting their own unseen battles, so it is important to try and be patience with the people around you but also with yourself. Encouragement, kind words and even just a smile can be all someone needs to help them through their day, treat yourself with this same kindness by trying to speak kindly to yourself and giving yourself a break if things do not work out. Remember everyone is doing their best, so support others where you can and give yourself time and seek support when you are struggling.
NightOwl5280
May 13th, 2020 3:38am
I think that a lot of it is about perspective taking. Sometimes when I am too hard on myself I need to take a step back and think what would I say to my best friend if it was her going through this. Or what would my mom tell me if I told her I was feeling like this. Most of the time, I would be much kinder to my best friend and my mom would say something loving and supportive (I'm lucky like that, she's awesome). When it's someone else I need to be kind to, it's kind of the reverse. I try to put myself in their shoes. Sometimes that is easier than other times. I can think to myself okay that driver cut me off because they are rushing to work or just didn't notice. It's much harder when something makes a costly mistake or is rude to me. But if i can pause long enough to take a deep breath, I can usually give it my best go. And I am not always perfect about either, but forgiving myself for that is part of being goof to myself, too.
Evertonest
May 8th, 2020 6:17am
It depends on what you mean by being good to yourself and others. If you mean doing good to yourself and other people, it may be wise to 'do good' to yourself first. You can't 'do good' to others when you aren't 'doing good' to yourself. So how can you treat yourself well? You have physical, psychological, social, and spiritual needs. Fulfilling those needs would mean doing good to yourself. These needs can overlap - fulfilling your social needs can fulfil your psychological needs. To fulfil your physical needs, they can include: - Eating healthy - Drinking plenty of water - Sleeping well - Exercise Satisfying psychological needs can differ from person to perso, but can include: - Making time to wind down and do things you enjoy - Playing with your pets - Seeking support from others when you're feeling down, upset, stressed, etc. - Journalling To satisfy social needs, just do whatever you like to do to connect with others. This can include: - Being part of a community - Hanging out with friends - Hanging out with family To satify spiritual needs, you can: - Meditate - Do religious activities - Go outdoors and connect with nature There are many ways to 'be good' to other people. They can include: - Doing something nice for others - Helping strangers - Complementing others - Donating to charity - Use respectful language to others - Maintaining and respecting boundaries
ChemistryLover
April 18th, 2020 9:01pm
I think sometimes is easier to be good to others and not to yourself. At least for me I'm a very harsh person when it comes to criticizing myself, my work and even the ways in which I react to situations. I think that we can be more critical of ourselves because we are in control of ourselves more. To be honest, it took me a while to understand the importance of being good to myself and doing so can vary by person. For me, I do activities that relax me and make me happy those activities that let me give me time for myself to grow as a person but also emotionally.
lovelyDancer19
April 11th, 2020 9:29pm
Everybody needs a little selfishness in your life, along with being good to others. You deserve the exact happiness you give to other people, but sometimes you need to give it to yourself. Praise yourself, when you do something good give yourself a reward. Spend a little money if you need to, a $5 ice cream won’t break the bank. As for others, give everyone a nice little smile as you pass. A single smile can change someone’s mood instantly. Smiles are contagious. It also won’t hurt to ask someone how they are feeling. Not everyone is happy and some need a listener if they are struggling.
Anonymous
December 22nd, 2019 12:47pm
We can be good to ourselves by showing ourselves kindness, especially if we feel like we don't deserve it at times. We take it easy on ourselves and we do things at our own pace. We don't hold ourselves accountable for things we have not done and we try not to hold drudges against people for things that they have done. When we are truly kind and good to ourselves, being good to others comes almost naturally. Loving ourselves and appreciating who we are is the first step to loving those around us and appreciating them. Doing the things that we love is nice, but doing the things we love with those who we love is even better. There is no secret here, if we show kindness to ourselves and if we feel proud of ourselves for what we do, we are good and kinder to others.
Anonymous
December 5th, 2019 12:51am
To be good to yourself, you need to learn to accept yourself and be happy with yourself. I find that learning to love yourself is truly important. We often forget to care about ourselves. Before you can be good to others you need to be happy with yourself. When it comes to others we should just treat others the way we want to be treated. We are all equal. No one in this world is more important or superior to another. No one is lower than anyone else. We were all created equally and we also need to remember we are all human.
Panda4202
December 4th, 2019 1:55pm
I believe it starts internally, start by loving yourself first. Understand it is human, it makes mistakes and that's okay. Forgive it. That's step 1. As for others, always remember each person has their own secret battle they're fighting, they might be going through a rough time or having a bad day and at times just giving a smile, saying goodmorning, sharing a chocolate bar or asking if they're okay can make everything better. If you keep that in mind, i believe being good to others will come out naturally. Everyone makes mistakes, its our privilege as humans to be allowed to be mistaken, to fall down and then get back up with a new kind of strength and knowledge. Spread love and forgive.
Miller2019
November 7th, 2019 12:27am
If you wanna be good to yourself and others, you always have to start eith yourself. Self worth self esteem and how we look at ourself as human beeings are really effecting how we treat ourself and others, if you don't love yourself, how can you love others? if you don't treat yourself with respect, then how do you expect others to give you respect? Tell yourself that you are worth it every single day. Tell yourself that you care about you too much to make that bad decision, because you know the outcome and consequence. The ultimate gift is to give someone else a reason to smile.
AmethystRayne96
September 25th, 2019 4:05am
Being good to yourself and others can truly make a difference in your day. Personally, I try to take time to think about my physical and mental health, what I would like to improve and how to do so, and do the things that I truly enjoy as much as possible. Being good to others can be as simple as just being there for someone when they need to talk, a shoulder to lean on, or just a friend to have fun with. I’ve found that really getting to know a person helps me learn what I can to do help them.
Anonymous
August 18th, 2019 1:13am
Try not to hide the truth, you can try to stay as honest as possible, to yourself because then you can review and understand better, to others because then they will have all the facts so that they later won't get confused and can asses the situation themselves first, also try seeing things out of different perspectives, for example: you have a problem about what you think about a certain event, you can look at this event from a negative perspective first, then from a positive one and finally from maybe an natural perspective. You never know what you may learn!
RhoenH
July 4th, 2019 5:47am
I always advocate for treating others the way you want to be treated, and do not give more than you can give. Be around people who make you happy. Don't surround yourself with toxic people or you will start to feel bad. Remember to always validate yourself, its easy to put yourself down, but try to say positive things to yourself, and keep doing it till you believe those things. Remember to take time for self care whenever you need it. When you take care of yourself, and conserve your energy you become a better person and you start making better friends.
15Kenzi
June 30th, 2019 4:27am
Just make sure that you feel good on a daily basis. Not only on the outside or health wise but also emotionally and mentally. Make sure you're stress free and happy. If you're not take some time out to make yourself stress free and happy. Try to set goals that are achievable and when you don't achieve them don't feel too bad. Cut yourself some slack. Try to enjoy everything once in a while. Go out to eat with someone , take a walk in the park , catch the latest movie or read a book. Keep in touch with family members and surround yourself with the people who love you. Make friends who are optimistic and supporting. Those who will correct you when you're wrong and help you get it right. Be with you when you need them. And please,if you can't do any one of these things doesn't mean you're not being kind to yourself. We're all human and born imperfect. As long as we accept us for who we are and what our capacity is , we'll be happy.
Anonymous
June 14th, 2019 6:03pm
Being good to yourself and others are two very different kettles of fish! If you're looking to improve your self love, I'd recommend writing a short list of things you like to do to feel relaxed. Maybe write a diary entry or have a think about the things about yourself that make you happy, and things you're proud of (there's always something, no matter how small!). To be good to others, ask them what kind of support they need. Check up on friends every so often and ask them if there's anything they want to talk about (especially if you've noticed them feeling blue).
Anonymous
July 12th, 2018 12:18pm
Before you be good to others you have to be good to yourself and that means treating yourself and everyone else with respect, as long as there is respect there is kindness
Anonymous
May 19th, 2018 1:57pm
Planing your future , having respect for others and your self having a beautiful heart :) no matter how many times you get rejected or knock down or hurt you have to push through it and realize your not the only one suffering with something or someone it’s many others that’s suffering worser we have to push through it , life is to short , life is full of lies and many other things you just have to watch your self and pick good choices and never stop giving up !